


First Impressions

by Bagpuss



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-07
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2018-02-16 12:37:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 51,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2269962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bagpuss/pseuds/Bagpuss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vilkas meets a gorgeous Elf but his lack of people skills let him down</p><p>I don't own Inigo, Smartbluecat does. See notes</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

'You only get one chance to make a first impression’, those words hung heavy in Vilkas’s mind as he sat staring at the stars, mead in hand. He couldn't understand what it was about that damned Elf that made him so damn nervous, he smiled at the thought of the Altmer, it disappeared when he remembered that he'd probably never speak to him again after the previous evening, it had all started so well, the beast blood made it difficult to sleep and being someone who suffers from bouts of insomnia anyway sometimes it was downright impossible, so he spent those nights lost in his own thoughts sitting on the back porch of Jorrvaskr. Last night was one of those nights, he sat listening to the breeze blowing through Whiterun, it always soothed him, suddenly something was carried to his ears, the sound of soft Lute playing. Curious Vilkas followed the sound, it was coming from the direction of the Skyforge, Vilkas walked as quietly as he could silently cursing the noise his boots were making but it seemed that the Lute player had not heard him, this he found to be untrue as when he reached the top of the staircase he turned and looked at him "You're not terribly sneaky" the Elf had said grinning at him from his position on the Anvil, the usually gruff Vilkas had found himself grinning back

"Sneaking is not for honourable warriors" he chastised gently, he was surprised at how thrilled he was that the grin was for him

"Well" said the Altmer "I wouldn't know anything about that" Vilkas was afraid he'd offended him, it seemed not though because the Elf was still grinning

"The honourable or the warrior" he cringed when he heard himself say it, it sounded so much better in his head

"The warrior, not really a weapons man myself, more of a mage" he said lifting his hand up and lightning appeared to sheath it like a gauntlet, Vilkas thought he would just dispel it but he didn't, instead he gathered it all together in a ball in his hand and as Vilkas watched it twisted and morphed into a beautiful flower then it dissipated leaving only a wonderful memory

"That was incredible, did you learn to do that in the Isles?" he said presuming the Altmer was not native to Skyrim, they did have native Altmer although they were rare.

"Kind of I suppose" he said and suddenly looked very sad, in his eyes he had a lost look that said he was very far away from Skyrim right at that moment, he seemed to jog himself out of it and grinned again, Vilkas felt he could gaze at that grin forever, he'd always preferred males, he didn't share his brothers affection, no near obsession for the female chest or any other part of their anatomy for that matter, but this Elf, Gods he was something else, Vilkas realised he was talking, he apologised and asked him to repeat it, the Elf's grin broadened

"I said, I hope my Lute playing didn't disturb you, I couldn't sleep and it's warm here" he said gesturing to the Skyforge

"No, not at all, you play well. Are you a Bard?" he asked desperate for the conversation not to end

"No" the Elf said, shaking his head "I only play for my own pleasure, playing helps me to think" he explained

"Yes, it must be stressful" Vilkas agreed

"What?" the Elf asked

"Thalmor duties" Vilkas said, the grin instantly disappeared from the Elf's face

"Not all Altmer are Thalmor" he hissed the anger clearly evident in his voice, he stood and stormed off ignoring Vilkas's desperate apologies.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The sleepless night spent staring at the stars and thinking about the Altmer did nothing to improve the foul mood that plagued Vilkas the following day, he was training the Whelps and they were suffering the brunt of it "Gods how many more times must I show you" he bellowed at Ria and the poor girl almost burst into tears "Do it properly!" Farkas was watching from the porch and decided the Whelps had had enough 'training' for one day and walked across, he dismissed them, ignoring his brothers scowl, they almost ran back into the mead hall Ria shooting Farkas a grateful look as she passed.

"Okay, I understand that you're not sleeping and I understand that makes you grouchy but that was brutal even for you. What's up brother?" he asked concerned

"I said something stupid and now I don't know how to fix it?" he said, eyes fixed firming on the floor in front of him

"Said what to who?" Farkas asked

"Doesn't matter, leave it" Vilkas growled defensively, his brother instinctively growled back then realisation spread across his face

"You've met someone" he said with a sly smile, "What's his name?"

"I have no idea" Vilkas said, "he didn't tell me"

"So who is he? Where did you meet? Tell me everything." Farkas was pleased for his brother, he'd had too few relationships because he was so damn picky, the fact that this man had made such an impression was surprising

"I already told you I don't know his name he didn't tell me, he was sat by the Skyforge last night playing his Lute. Look it's all irrelevant anyway 'cause I said something stupid and he got angry and stormed off, I doubt he'll ever want to talk to me again" Vilkas said sadly, Farkas was about to reply when Whiterun shook with the shout of a single word

“DOVAKIN”

The brothers both looked at each other and turned to rush into Jorrvaskr when Farkas caught a familiar scent on the air, Blood!, It was then they heard the calls and shouts for somebody to help, without speaking they both turned and ran towards the commotion, Vilkas blood froze when he saw what the problem was and where the strong smell of blood was coming from, barely standing, in front of the gate was the Altmer from the Skyforge, he looked like he'd been in a serious fight, he was covered in blood and white as a sheet. Vilkas and Farkas ran down to help, the Elf looked at Vilkas

"See!" he said weakly "No fighter" and then he collapsed, Vilkas caught him so he didn't bang his head but he was unconscious just the same. Vilkas lifted the unresponsive Elf into his arms and looked at his brother

"We'll take him to Jorrvaskr, I have healing potions and we can care for him there"

"Where are you taking him" hissed a strange coloured Khajiit, clearly concerned

"The mead hall, Jorrvaskr" Farkas said soothingly "it's where we live, he'll be more comfortable there"

"I WILL accompany you" the Khajiit said firmly

"Fine!" said Vilkas and stalked off towards home.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It had been several hours since they had managed to get the healing potions into the Elf, he was still unconscious but seemed more comfortable, Vilkas had checked him over but he seemed to have nothing more serious than bruising, although the black smudges looked very painful, he was looking down at him wondering why something beautiful was so often so fragile when his brother entered

"Any change?" he asked concerned

"No" Vilkas answered not looking away from the sleeping Elf

"Wait! Is he?" Farkas asked realisation dawning

"The one from the Skyforge, Aye" Vilkas said tearing his eyes away to look at his brother, desperately searching his face for signs of disapproval, he found none "What happened to the Cat?" he asked suddenly remembering the Khajiit that had so annoyed him at the gate

"Inigo, he's upstairs with Ria," Farkas said "he's telling about what happened, quite a tale, Ria's hanging on his every word" Farkas told Vilkas about the Dragon attack and the battle that followed when he'd finished Vilkas was confused

"But if he wasn't hurt during the fighting where did all this blood come from?" he asked

"Apparently not only gorgeous" Farkas teased then his tone took on a more serious note "but heroic as well, threw himself between a wounded guard and the Dragon, warded himself and the guard until he could drag him to safety, guard had been wounded pretty bad, blood spurting and he used all his magic to save him, so the Khajiit says"

"Wow" Vilkas responded it seemed pretty weak but it was all he could come up with, but Farkas hadn't finished

"That's not the end" he said "there's more"

"Well, get on with it" Vilkas said eager to hear more

"Well Inigo, the Khajiit and the guards managed to kill the Dragon and Joshua..."

"Joshua" Vilkas mused, he liked it

"Yeah that's his name although Inigo believes it's not his real name. Anyway Joshua was just helping the guard to his feet when the Dragons corpse started to spark, cackle and flake and this beautiful energy flowed out of it straight into Joshua, seemed like it hurt too he said. You know I think he's Dragonborn, it all fits, I thought about it and it does, the energy, the call of the Greybeards we heard earlier, Dragonborn" he finished hopefully

"Yes Farkie, I think you're right", Farkas grinned at his brother’s confirmation.

"Who are the Greybeards and what is a Dragonborn?" a weak voice came from behind them, they swung round to see Joshua struggling to sit up, Vilkas hurried to help him, once seated he groaned and put his hands to his head

"Take it easy, how do you feel?" Vilkas said concern evident in his voice

"Like I've got the mother of all hangovers" the Elf groaned, he tried to reach for the tankard of water Tilma had left for him earlier, Farkas leaned in and passed it to him, he took it with a wince, "Thanks" he said and took a big swig "So?" he asked

"What?" Farkas said, the Elf rolled his eyes with a look that said 'God's, Nords'

"Who are the Greybeards and what is a Dragonborn?" he reminded them. 

They told him what they knew of the Greybeards and Dragonborn, which wasn't much,

"Great," muttered Joshua as he passed out again.


	2. Dragonborn and the Thalmor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chance meeting in Markarth gives Vilkas a little insight
> 
> I don't own Skyrim Bethesda does  
> I don't own Inigo either, Smartbluecat does

It had been a couple of weeks since Joshua had left for High Hrothgar and previous to that Vilkas hadn't seen him much, he'd left Jorrvaskr the next day and taken a room at the Bannered Mare for a few days to sufficiently recover from his ordeal, he had seen Inigo though a couple of times and the Khajiit assured him that Joshua was doing quite well and would soon be well again. The fact that it had taken so long for him to recover had worried Vilkas but it seemed that he was now fully healed. He was sat on the back porch on his usual table daydreaming about Joshua's jet black hair, his dark brooding eyes that seemed to burn into your soul, his amazing smile....when a noise jolted him back, he listened harder sure his mind was playing tricks when he heard it again, the song on the wind. It was coming from the Skyforge and Vilkas rushed up there, sure enough sat with his back to him was Joshua, he didn't turn around as Vilkas approached and he wondered if the Elf had heard him, he had because as he got to him he said "You know it's really rude to try and sneak up on someone, not the behaviour of an honourable warrior at all" he turned his head and grinned at Vilkas, who sat down by the Anvil leaning against the forge

"Can I help it if I'm light on my feet" he said with a cheeky smile

"I wouldn't go that far" Joshua chuckled "but you're not heavy either" he added, Vilkas wasn't sure but he thought he heard desire in the Elf's tone

"And you are more of an honourable warrior than you think," he said "Inigo told us what happened, you saved that guards life. You should be proud" he added

"Maybe" Joshua said quietly. He started playing again, it was a tune that Vilkas didn't recognise

"That's a lovely song, I don't recognise it" he said

"No reason you should, it's one of mine" he answered, gorgeous, heroic and talented, Gods he couldn't get enough of this Elf

"What's it called?" he asked

"Wish you were here with me" he said flatly. They sat there in silence for a while, Joshua quietly playing, Vilkas gazing at him, 'Get a hold of yourself' he told himself sternly

"Joshua?" he said eventually

"Mhmm" Joshua mumbled seeming slightly lost

"Who is Ilianna?" Joshua snapped his head up to look at him

"How do you know that name?" he snapped almost aggressively, Vilkas inner Wolf growled, it had been passive till then as it always seemed to be in Joshua's company but now it grew aggressive

"You muttered it in your sleep when you were.....at Jorrvaskr" he finished feeling very nervous that the Elf would storm off again, he seemed to sag, the anger of a moment ago evaporated

"Someone I love very much" he said quietly "I guess I'm missing her more at the moment as she would help me to.....come to terms with all this" he said the tears welling up in eyes, Vilkas felt a cold spike drive through his heart at this sight and he was about to get up and comfort the Elf when he shook it off, the Altmer mask slipping back into place "So I play and remember her and that has to be enough" he said his tone much more brisk and businesslike, 

"So you and Farkas are twins right?" he asked suddenly

"Yeah" Vilkas said "he's all I've got, what about you?"

"Parents, sister don't see any of them, lets just say I couldn't be a bigger disappointment if I tried" he smiled but there was no joy in it

"But you're brave and talented, how could they be disappointed?" he growled his inner Wolf becoming very agitated

"Because I don't toe the Dominion line like a good little Altmer, my black hair, my piercings, pretty much everything about me. Not my sister but my parents..." he said "Safe to say they hate me" Vilkas was shocked, the way he said that like it didn't bother him, the thought of Farkas, his only family hating him was unthinkable. He opened his mouth to say something encouraging

"You can't help your hair colour" he said 'Divines that was lame' he thought 'I suck at this’ but Joshua smiled

"I would agree if it was actually black" he grinned at Vilkas and his heart leapt and his Wolf growled happily "Naturally my hair is white"

"I like it" Vilkas stated "your piercings too" at this Joshua smiled

"Thanks" he got down from the Anvil "well, I suppose I'd better turn in, so, night" he said turning to go. He took a couple of steps and stopped "Thanks Vilkas" he said quietly

"For what?" Vilkas said confused

"For being there" Joshua said quietly and disappeared down the steps.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas didn't see Joshua for a couple of weeks although he seemed to be able to think of little else except that gorgeous Elf and his breathtaking smile, so it was a relief to him when Farkas said he had a job in Markarth and would he like to join him. When they reached Markarth they were to report to the Jarl so they went straight to the keep. They heard the argument as soon as they entered, it seemed they would have to go past so they decided to wait at the door until it was resolved, that was until they heard a familiar voice 

"Don't you dare touch me you Thalmor puppet" the voice was filled with hatred and venom. They rushed round down to find Joshua arguing with a Thalmor Justicar

"Now Sindill calm down and let’s be reasonable about this" the Justicar said

"Sindill died with her, died when you killed her! Never call me that. Ever!" he said menacingly

"I didn't kill her Sin...No one did, the Justicar involved, he couldn't have known that would happen, High Command found no fault..." he was interrupted by Joshua punching him in the face,

"Give that to High Command" he said the menacing tone was still present, one of the guards took a step forward but the Thalmor gestured them to stop, leave it. He wiped his face on his glove

"I know you're still angry so I'll let that go" he said

"Good of you" hissed Joshua

"You should tell the Ambassador about this Dragonborn matter, she'll have you looked at...."

"Experimented on" Joshua corrected

"Examined, and maybe we can help you understand it fully" he finished

"I think I'll pass" Joshua hissed and turned to go, the Thalmor put his hand on his arm to stop him, continue their conversation and Vilkas saw the lightning glove appear on Joshua's hand, as he wrenched his arm from the other Elf's grasp, within seconds Vilkas was at his side stopping him from attacking, taking him away so he could do no harm, Joshua didn't resist until they were outside. He pulled himself roughly from the hold Vilkas had him in and started pacing angrily "Who does he think he fucking is?" he said "Asshole!" Vilkas was pleased Farkas was here, he knew how to deal with people

"What happened?" Farkas said

"Thalmor bastard!" Joshua spat "I need a fucking drink" and he started down towards the tavern. Vilkas was torn, he wanted to follow Joshua worried that in this mood he'd end up in Cidhna Mine or worse, but he was here with his brother, Farkas seemed to sense his brother’s dilemma because he said

"Go with him and keep him out of trouble, I'll go see the Jarl and meet you at the Inn" he said and went back into the keep. Joshua was quick and had almost got to the tavern, he was snarling angrily at a Priest of Stendar when Vilkas caught him up

"No I don't know anything about this fucking house, I don't live in this shithole, ask the bastard at the keep, fucking Thalmor know about everything" and he stormed off towards the Inn again, Vilkas left the bewildered Priest and followed Joshua "Give me a pint of the strongest swill you sell" he asked the barkeep, Vilkas indicated to make it two and thanked the barman. Joshua chucked the coin down on the bar to pay for the drinks and took his to a table. 

“By Meridia this stuff is foul" he said as Vilkas sat, he gave Joshua a small smile

"Good" he said "so you won't be drinking too much of it then", this provoked a small smile from Joshua and he seemed to relax a little "So what did he say to get you so worked up?" he asked

"They know I'm Dragonborn, and want to experiment on me to see how I can be of use to them, not how he put it though" he said swigging his mead and making a face

"Why are you in Markarth" Vilkas asked

"Moth gro-Bagol, the Jarl's personal smith asked me to get him a Daedra Heart, I was here to drop it off. He caught me on my way out" he explained "Go ahead ask if you like" he added

"Was Ilianna the girl you were talking out?" Vilkas asked

"Yes" he said a deep unending grief filled his eyes dampening their usual sparkle

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to" Vilkas forced himself to say

"Thanks, but...." his voice trailed off

"But what?" Vilkas asked

"Maybe......maybe I should, I suppose I never have and I feel comfortable with you Vilkas, like I don't have to pretend....I can just be me, you won't judge" he added quietly

"You can" Vilkas said "You can tell me anything. We're friends, friends help each other". He started to say something and stopped, Vilkas looked round and saw Farkas walking up to the bar with Joshua's friend Inigo in tow. They bought beers and joined the two friends. Joshua seemed on edge all evening and jumped whenever the door opened like he expected a Thalmor regiment to come in here and swoop him up, Vilkas didn't get a chance to say anything until they retired to their rooms, he stopped by to see him on his way to bed, the Elf seemed lost somehow, very different to the anger of earlier in the day 

"You okay?" he asked when the door was opened

"Yeah," Joshua said and stepped aside so Vilkas could enter and their conversation would remain private

"You've been quiet and on edge all evening, do you want to rethink that and try again?" he grinned

"Okay, not great" he said grinning back "I'll be alright, I've faced worse than this, trust me"

"I do" murmured Vilkas staring at the floor, when he finally looked up he saw Joshua staring at him surprised, before he knew what he was doing he was claiming the Elf's lips with his in a deep passionate kiss which the Elf returned with equal vigour, Vilkas growled with desire. When they parted their breathing heavy and erratic Joshua muttered 

"God's! I've never been kissed like that before", 

Vilkas was suddenly ashamed that he had forced himself on this man, his friend, he muttered that he was sorry and turned and virtually ran out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inigo is a modded companion, heres a link to his page where there is a video showing him in all his crazy glory http://www.nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/40960/.


	3. The Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua gets some bad news, Vilkas tries to help

Vilkas was miserable, the job had gone alright, but just after leaving the tomb, prize in hand it had started to rain, heavily and he was soaked through to the skin. His body ached as he dragged himself up the road to Whiterun and his bed. When he arrived he discovered it had not been raining here and he snarled at the guard when he mentioned Vilkas's appearance. The guard looked nervous and muttered an apology followed by an ‘I was only saying’, Vilkas snarled in reply and stamped through the gates. He was just passing Warmaiden’s when the front door of Breezehome swung open and Joshua appeared, it was immediately obvious to Vilkas that he had had a too much to drink, he came out of the house, didn't bother to shut the door and wobbled unsteadily up the road towards the Jorrvaskr, 'he's going to the Skyforge', Vilkas thought, panic slowly setting in, he picked up his pace to catch the drunk Elf up but as he passed Breezehome an Altmer came rushing out. 

"Sin, come back this instant..." he stopped when he caught sight of Vilkas and his expression turned from concern to disdain "Yes, is there something I can help you with" he said with a typical Thalmor air, he wasn't wearing his robes but Vilkas recognised his scent, he was the Thalmor that he'd stopped Joshua from attacking in the keep, two? Yes two months ago. It seemed so much longer than that, he'd actively avoided Joshua when he was in town. Shame over what he'd done prevented him from going to talk to him, he realised the Thalmor was still staring at him "Well?" he demanded, he was obviously not used to not being answered immediately.

"No" Vilkas said trying to keep his voice light, although his insides were churning "just going home, you need any help?" he gestured toward the wobbly Altmer who'd almost disappeared from sight

"Thank you, No" the Thalmor said curtly "I can manage perfectly well", he turned on his heel and went after Joshua who had now disappeared from view. Vilkas sighed and started to walk on home when a movement caught his eye, it was Lydia, Vilkas knew her a little, when they were younger she'd had a brief fling with Farkas. He'd heard she'd been made housecarl, she smiled apologetically at Vilkas,

"Bad news and alcohol, not a good mix" she said simply, he wanted to ask her what the bad news was, why was that Thalmor here, the last time Joshua had seen him he'd tried to kill him and now here he was drinking with the bastard. Instead he just gave her what he hoped was a sympathetic smile and carried on to Jorrvaskr. His Wolf growled possessively, 'No!' he told himself 'I can't be possessive, he's not mine".

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

With all the excitement in town and his Wolf's agitation, Vilkas knew sleep would be impossible, so he went out into the training yard and sat staring at the stars. The voice of the Thalmor came drifting down "Please, Sin, come away from the edge, I'm no more comfortable with you being there than I was with you being near the forge"

"What does it matter," his voice sounded very slurred and dejected "what's the point?"

"You are a superiorly bred Altmer...." The Thalmor began

"No!" the desperation in Joshua's voice ripped at Vilkas "don't give me the fucking company line, just...." he trailed off unable to finish the sentence

"Just what Sin? Tell me" The Thalmor's voice had taken on an almost begging tone "Please"

"I'm just so gods damn tired Mar" he said the tears were obvious even though Vilkas couldn't see them "They've taken everything from me, everything" he said quietly

"I know Sin, but maybe it's for the best, she hasn't been 'well' for a while now, you know that" The Thalmor said soothingly, trying to be supportive

"Fuck," Joshua spat, the anger returning full force "You sound like him, like it was her fault not his, Bastard!", Vilkas then heard the sound of a bottle being thrown violently against a wall

"Please come home, you need to rest, grieve properly for Ilianna. I can stay if you need me to" the Thalmor said

"Okay, but only because I think if I don't I'm going to fall asleep up here" Joshua said, his voice defeated "plus I just threw my wine at the Skyforge, you're fault" Vilkas could tell from his voice he'd just given the Thalmor one of his unforgettable smiles. He heard their footfalls on the steps, they were making their way down

"You know you really do have a foul mouth sometimes" the Thalmor commented as they passed Jorrvaskr

"I can remember a time when you couldn't get enough of my foul mouth" Joshua replied "or at least your tongue couldn't"

"Yes, well....." the Thalmor stuttered and then was sharply cut off. Joshua had obviously kissed him because he said "You know that Spiced Wine doesn't taste too bad after all, I just tasted it the wrong way". Vilkas didn't hear what Joshua replied because it was so quiet and they were moving out of earshot. Vilkas sat for a long time trying not to be jealous and failing.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The following day was a glorious sunny one, and the whelps were training in the yard, Vilkas was bellowing at them every time they made the slightest mistake, he'd just chastised one for a sloppy attack when he heard a groan, he turned round and saw Joshua standing watching, he noticed him looking and gave a small wave which seemed to be very painful. Vilkas barked at the recruits to continue their practice and wandered over, Joshua gave him a tired smile "Hi" he said "had a bit too much to drink last night", Vilkas looked at him, his eyes were swollen and red, probably from crying, he had bags under them, he looked awful

"Aye, I know" Vilkas said quietly so not to pain him any more than he already was

"Oh, it was you. Ondolemar thought it was Farkas" he said, "Sorry, I know terrible conduct not befitting a Dragonborn, I got a letter with some bad news" he explained

"You okay?" he asked

"Yeah, nothing I can't handle, like I said I've been through worse, I'll be fine" he smiled but it didn't reach his eyes, they remained dark and cold "Anyway better be moving on, I'm off to apologise for throwing a bottle of Spiced Wine at the wall behind the forge last night, like I said bad night, so I'll see you sometime" he turned to go

"Joshua" Vilkas said stopping him

"Yeah" he said "what's up?"

"If you need to talk, you know where I am okay" he said

"Thanks, but I'll be fine, I always am" he gave him another half smile and went up to the Skyforge, he came down a few moments later and headed into town.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The Thalmor stayed for three days and Vilkas saw little of Joshua, just once at the market shopping with Lydia, he didn't look well at all, he'd obviously not been sleeping and by the smell drinking far too much, instead of his usual citrus he stunk of alcohol and sweat, so not bathing either he thought to himself, his inner Wolf growled with lust at the smell and it took all his self control not to take the man to bed and have him, but it wouldn't be right, not after Markarth. They hadn't really talked since, just that once in the training yard. Joshua had tried a couple of times but Vilkas avoided him, and he really didn't know why. 

A few days later Vilkas saw Lydia in the Bannered Mare, he'd taken to drinking there because on the whelps had a crush on him and he didn't know how to tell her she wasn't his type and not offend her. He hoped if he stayed away from the mead hall for a while she'd get over it. She saw him and gestured to the empty chair at her table. Vilkas bought a mead and then went and sat with her, the usual small talk ensued 'How Lydia’s family was ‘‘they were fine’’ how is Farkas?' 'he's good' etc until Vilkas had built up sufficient courage to ask about what he really wanted to know "So how's Joshua?" he asked as casually as he could, Lydia looked concerned

"He won't talk to me Vilkas" she said "I've tried and he just shuts down. Ondolemar....."

"Oh so it's Ondolemar now is it?" he sneered

"What would you prefer me to call my Thanes guest, any suggestions? Thalmor Bastard maybe, yes I'm sure that would go down well, calling the man sharing my Thanes bed a Thalmor Bastard" she instantly regretted the outburst as Vilkas's face betrayed the hurt that statement or rather the later part of it had caused "Sorry Vil, I didn't know" she said quietly "does he know?" she asked

"We've kissed once, in Markarth" he said no knowing what else to say, did Joshua know how he felt? He hadn't told him

"If you kiss anything like your brother he knows" she said with a cheeky smile, then her face turned more serious "be careful falling for my Thane, yes he's sharing his bed with Ondolemar right now but I've never known him be with someone more than a couple of weeks, he doesn't allow himself to become attached, 'attachments equal pain Lydia', he's always saying, the only other thing he says with equal consistency is 'Lydia, for fucks sake call me Joshua’'" he smiled at that,

"So what does the Thalmor do? I'm guessing it's not a sex thing" Vilkas grumbled

"No, Ondolemor can get him to open up a bit, I still have no idea what's going on mind you, it's like their talking in code. All I know for sure is this woman Ilianna has died and Joshua is grieving her loss terribly"

"Is the Thalmor still here?" Vilkas asked staring at the fire beside them

"No, he had to leave this morning. Duty calls" she said, "another?" She asked gesturing to his tankard

"No, I'm gonna go and see Joshua" he said, he didn't know why he just needed to see him,

"Good luck getting him to answer the door, he was well on his way to passed out when I left" she said heading for the bar. Vilkas stood and left the Inn.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Alright, Alright, there's no need to smash the fucking door off it's hinges I'm coming" a voice slurred from behind the door, it was opened and Joshua stood there, he spent a few moments trying to focus on who was doing the banging "Vilkas, now's not a good time, I'm a little busy, can we do this, whatever this is, later" Vilkas inner Wolf snarled and his eyes flashed orange, just for a second "Oh right," he said "and I suppose that's meant to scare me, I could take you with one hand tied behind my back, you wanna go big man, let's do this" the anger flashed in Joshua's eyes and his hand was encased in Ice. At sight of this Vilkas's anger evaporated and he took the hand not encased in Ice

"No, I don't want to fight you, we're worried about you. Who is this woman Ilianna? Is her loss what made you choose males? Because then you're not being unfaithful to her?" Vilkas asked trying to get him to talk, not shut down or hide behind the mask. He laughed gently

"She would have really liked you Vilkas, you ask straight out no messing around, she liked that in a person and you would have loved her, she was so much better than me, I think that was part of the problem, she was perfect" tears started flowing from his eyes and he went and sat by the fire, bringing his hands up to hide his face, Vilkas followed picking up a clean rag for him to wipe his eyes, he just handed him the rag and said nothing, the tears subsided a few moments later and he began to speak again, more hoarsely this time "she was so talented with magic, she's the one who taught me that trick I showed you, she taught me one for each of the three elemental magic's, 'something beautiful out of something so ugly' she used to say. They came early one morning to take her, I was still in bed, I made it out to see two Justicars taking her away to a lab, to 'maximize her potential' Father said. She was there a year before it happened, I wasn't allowed to see her, she had to concentrate and ‘my visit would be a distraction' he said. Then came the day my world came crashing down, my mother sat me down and told me that there had been an accident, it seems Ilianna had been training and they pushed her too hard and....put simply she'd magically lobotomised herself" Vilkas took his hand again 

"Divines Josh, how old were you?" he asked

"35" he said "Just a kid really, I really went off the rails after that, started publicly speaking out against the Dominion, that was pretty much when my father disowned me and I left the Isles, haven't been back since, don't intend to go" he said squeezing Vilkas's hand and letting go, he walked out to the back to get more mead, with that small physical gesture of comfort he lost control, he followed Joshua into the back room, which it seemed contained an alchemy lab or enchanting altar he wasn't sure which, Joshua seemed to sense him behind him and turned looking deep into his eyes, a moment or two passed and then Joshua pulled the Nord into his arms and started to kiss him hungrily, Vilkas growled and his tongue pushed it's way into the Elves mouth, Joshua groaned and ran his fingers through the dark hair, then pulled away 

"No" he gasped walking into the main room "No I can't, not with you, I'm sorry, you should leave before I lose my resolve and take you to bed" he said not meeting Vilkas's eye, he'd felt his arousal and it was driving him crazy, they wanted each other what was the problem

"Joshua..." Vilkas began

"Don't Vilkas, please" he said "You don't know me, I'm poison, I destroy everything that's near me, I'll hurt you and I care about you too much to do it"

"So don't" said Vilkas

"It's not that simple, you're an honourable warrior and I’m a mage with a past, a bad one. I'm not what you need, I'm just what you want, sometimes they're the same and sometimes they're not" he said "Please, go" he added quietly. Vilkas turned and reluctantly left him alone with his thoughts and memories.


	4. Ondolemar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas takes their relationship to the next level

Ondolemar looked up from his desk when there was a knock at the door "Enter" he commanded. The door opened and one of his guards, he didn't know his name, he never bothered to learn it came in

"High Commander" said the guard

"Yes, what is it?" he sighed he was never going to get this paperwork done with all these interruptions

"There is a Nord to see you sir, not from the Jarl's court, or it would seem from this Hold, as he says he's here on personal business and became quite aggressive when we probed further. Shall I tell him you are busy" the eager young guard said, not a good idea

"Do you presume to decide who I will and will not see?" he asked coldly "Well? Answer me"

"No of course not High Commander, I just thought....." He started but Ondolemar cut him off

"Yes, well, I believe in future you should leave the thinking to someone tasked with it and devote your time to executing your duties perfectly. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes High Commander," the guard said eagerly hoping that was an end to the matter. It was,

"Send the Nord in immediately" he barked and the young guard left. Ondolemar sighed again, this is not what he thought his life would be, an endless stream of paperwork and reports on Talos Worship. Ondolemar smiled to himself as Joshua's drunken words came back to him 'Way I see it, either they're wrong and they're screwed or we're wrong and we're screwed, either way somebody gets screwed!', a cough brought him back to his depressing office in this god awful place "Sorry, yes, hello" he said quite flustered there was something about this Nord which put him on edge "please take a seat" he gestured to the chair in front of his desk and Vilkas looked at it and sat. "What can I do for you?" Ondolemar said "I believe it was personal business"

"I need to know who she was?" he said simply "and what happened". 

Ondolemor thought about misunderstanding, pleading ignorance but said

"Sindill's older sister, she was beautiful, but inside she was beyond words", she touched people in a way I've never seen before or since" Vilkas was surprised to see a tear in the Thalmors eye, he began talking again "I guess you're wondering why all this is relevant to your situation other than she has just passed away, it's relevant because she captured the heart of everyone she ever met, after a death people say everyone loved them and it's not really true, it never is, there's always someone who doesn't, with her it was true and no one loved her more than Sindill and when her soul died, a part of him died too”

"That's not all of it, is it Elf" Vilkas growled, Ondolemar smiled

"Is it ever really all Nord" he stated "No you're right it's not, there's more, some of it personal and I'd like to keep it that way. It's not relevant to you and the rest, I don't feel comfortable talking about it”, Ondolemar sighed. “Vilkas is it?”

Vilkas nodded

“I don’t as a general rule give advice but, this once I’ll make an exception. Just tell Sin…Joshua how you feel, you may be surprised at his reaction. I'm sorry but I've said all I'm going to say"

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was odd sitting in Joshua's house without him being home, Lydia was away at one of his other houses, Vilkas tensed when he heard the key in the lock. "I'll unpack then you can have the mammoth steak you were given in the Market, you've got to...." he stopped short when he saw Vilkas sat waiting for him "How?"

"Did I pick the lock and get in, a friend in Riften owed me a favour, best lockpick I ever knew, he can lock 'em again" Vilkas grinned

"And if I didn't come home tonight?" Joshua said an amazing smile spreading across his face

"My friend would come and unlock it again in the morning, he's staying in my room at the hall. We need to talk, Joshua" he said sternly

"Hey, I'm not one of your whelps,” he said smiling and hushing the Husky inside shutting the evening air out "You can't order me around, oh by the way Bran this is Vilkas, Vilkas this is Bran, isn't she great, not a big fan of the name but she came with it so" Bran trotted up to Vilkas and sniffed him her hackles came up and she growled, Vilkas couldn't stop growling back his eyes flashing, he was interrupted by Joshua "Now play nice doggies, Bran I know you come home to a strange dog in your house, and for that I'm sorry, Vilkas I remind you that you are a guest" he chastised lightly grinning in that way that made Vilkas melt, then he realised what Joshua had said

"Wait! You know?" he asked shocked "For how long?"

"A while, you're aura is a different colour, you growl a lot, you never get sick and you rarely sleep, hence Werewolf" Joshua explained, "and then there's the wet dog thing" he said cheekily

"And you're okay with it?" Vilkas asked nervously

"Yeah, I might even let you devour me later" he said with a sexy grin but it soon vanished when he saw the look on Vilkas face, this was a really big deal to him, "oh gods Vil I'm sorry, forgive me, it's my defence system when dealing with big subjects I joke, I flirt, makes it easier" Vilkas reached out and took his hand

"I...I really like you Joshua and my Wolf does too, you calm him, it's easier when you're around" he said self consciously it was obvious that he didn't talk like this often

"Farkas is better at this isn't he?" Joshua smiled "Don't worry you're doing fine" Vilkas didn't reply just kept staring at the fire. At that moment they were startled by a loud clang, Vilkas leapt up his hand instinctively going to the hilt of his sword, he relaxed when he realised it was just Bran banging her dinner dish, Joshua smiled

"Okay, okay, I'll put dinner on" he fussed her head and removed her armour making her more comfortable, then he got the mammoth steak out of the pack and laid it on a metal pan and then disappeared behind them, they heard him bumping around,

"That's for you I guess" he said to Bran, who puffed happily wagging her tail

"Yeah," Joshua said adding two Venison steaks to the pan and putting it on the fire "I just can't eat something that has at some point had snot in it" he grinned at Vilkas, "I know, stupid, but in fairness, your warrior brother is scared of Spiders" he added with a chuckle, Vilkas grinned

"Yeah, but the spiders here are really big" he laughed. Joshua walked over and stood in front of Vilkas tapping his feet apart with his foot, he sat down between his knees and looked up at him

"So am I forgiven then?" he asked seriously "I really am sorry", Vilkas leaned down and slid his hand behind Joshua's head and kissed him, not like when they'd kissed previously, those were full of passion and want. This was gentler, coming from a place of love

"Of course, always" he smiled "I meant what I said, I really like you and I get the feeling you feel the same" the Elf stiffened slightly and then turned away towards the fire, Vilkas tried to stop him, make him talk about this when his face broke into a massive grin

"Fine, baby, I'll stay" he said "But don't complain to me when you're steak's overdone". Vilkas smiled and let him go. While he was dealing with the food he felt a warm feeling growing inside, 'he called me baby' he thought to himself, 'that's got to be a good sign right', he was jogged out of his thoughts by a plate being presented to him containing one of the Steaks, some Grilled Leeks and some Bread, he took the food with a thank you, Joshua sat in the other chair with his food, Bran's steak was still in the pan and Vilkas gestured to it

"Dog thing, surprised you wouldn't know being a Nord" Joshua explained "the Alpha Dog in a pack eats first, then the others feed. Food, amongst a few other gestures sets hierarchy, plus she likes her meat cremated" he added grinning, Vilkas was surprised to find his meat was cooked perfectly, still just a little blood left to run onto his plate when he cut into it

"This is lovely, you're a good cook" he smiled, Joshua smiled back

"Thanks" he said. They ate in silence for a while then Vilkas broke it

"So how do you know that thing about Dogs?" he asked

"My parents neighbour used to breed them" he answered passing Vilkas a Mead "I used to go and help him with them, I love Dogs, I've always preferred Canine company" he grinned cheekily, Vilkas scowled light-heartedly and he continued "I can also assist in a bitches labour, man of many talents see" he grinned, taking Vilkas empty plate to the bowl, he returned with two Sweetrolls on a plate giving one to Vilkas.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Once they'd finished eating they washed the dishes, Joshua telling about how he'd been inducted into the Dawnguard, 'as if he doesn't have enough to worry about' Vilkas thought to himself as he dried the dish 'with this Dragonborn thing', once done they sat down by the fire, Joshua back in front of Vilkas, he found himself idly running his fingers through the Elf's wonderfully soft hair listening to him talk "....and the worst part of it was the bloody stuff is ugly" he laughed

"Did you explain to them that Mage's don't wear armour?" Vilkas asked

"Yes, multiple times, they just kept insisting, I think it might be some sort of uniform," he shook his head defiantly "I'm not wearing it" he said. Vilkas smiled at his stubborn, rebellious Elf, 'his', could he really say that, he needed to know, his Wolf started to become agitated

"Joshua" he said quietly, the Elf looked up at him, "I need to know" he said

"Need to know what?" he asked

"I need to know..." he didn't know how to say it, "as you put it the other night, what this is" he said nervously, he was relieved when Joshua smiled

"What do you want it to be?" he responded quietly "don't be scared, just tell me", Joshua's reassuring tone made Vilkas more confident

"I want to be yours" he said simply, Joshua twitched slightly like Vilkas's words had stung him, finally he relaxed and shifted himself up onto his lap, straddling his thighs, Vilkas felt himself respond slightly to the heat of the Elf

"This is.....strange for me, I don't do the relationship thing, I do the nights of burning passion with no strings, no attachments" he closed his eyes "but I can’t stop thinking about you plus tonight, just relaxing with you, has been one of the best nights of my life, so...." he trailed off  
"So" prompted Vilkas, he couldn't help the hopeful tone his voice had

"So," Joshua said and sighed "I think, maybe...." he didn't finish his sentence before Vilkas captured his mouth in a deep kiss. When they parted Joshua looked at him with a burning desire in his eyes, "I want you" he growled, Vilkas growled back and stood holding Joshua until he'd placed his feet on the floor, this done he took Vilkas's hand and went upstairs.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Once they got to the bedroom, Joshua turned and pulled Vilkas into his arms kissing him, his tongue exploring all Vilkas teeth, this just inflamed his need and his tongue fought back and drew a groan of excitement from his lover, Joshua pulled away slightly, provoking a growl of frustration, he kissed Vilkas gently "Patience my love" he said and attempted to remove the armour which was currently wrapping the object of his desire, eventually tired of waiting Vilkas batted his hands away and the garments were soon on the floor 

"Mmmmm" Joshua said lustily, his arousal evident in his thin trousers "you really are a thing of beauty", Vilkas felt his cheeks redden, none of his other lovers had been so forward, not that he'd had that many. Joshua pulled him down on to the bed, Vilkas gazed at him for a moment then leaned down and gently kissed his lips, trailing along his jaw and up to his ear, Joshua moaned loudly when he ran his tongue along the length of it, he smiled to himself, 'so what I heard about Elven ears is true then’ he thought, he was growing desperate, his cock begging for some attention and by the looks of it Joshua was feeling the same

"Oil?" he whispered huskily in the ear he just been pleasuring

"Bedside cabinet" Joshua gasped "top drawer"

"Right" he whispered "and I want those gone when I get back", he added indicating Joshua's trousers. The Elf moaned quietly and gave Vilkas a dirty smile. He found it quite easily and soon returned to the bed pleased to see his instruction had been followed, he positioned himself between Joshua's legs and covered a couple of fingers with oil and placed his hand on his thigh, just this simple touch made Joshua tense and gasp with desire, smiling Vilkas slowly ran his hand up the leg and without touching the throbbing member ran his finger all the way down. He traced his finger around the opening 

"Gods" Joshua said desperation clear in his voice "if you don't stop teasing me I'll be there before we start", 

Vilkas smiled and slipped one oiled finger inside the opening, Joshua groaned deep inside his throat as Vilkas found what he wanted and rubbed the sensitive lump, he pulled his finger out and then slipped it back inside, Joshua writhed in ecstasy, scrunching the furs into his fists, soon Vilkas could easily slide two fingers in and out. Joshua looked at him pleadingly 

"I want you Vil, Please" he begged, needing no further encouragement he slipped his fingers out and replaced them with his cock, silently thanking the Divines that he'd had the presence of mind to oil it earlier, he groaned as he felt him encase him, simply taking pleasure in being within his lovers body, it seemed however that Joshua needed more

"I'm not a virgin Vilkas, Fuck me!" he groaned desperately pushing his hips towards him, the Wolf inside growled breaking the thin tether of control Vilkas had left, he obeyed, taking Joshua in his hand, stroking him firmly in time with his own thrusts, "oh Gods....I can't....I'm gonna....Ohhhhh" Joshua groaned as Vilkas felt the wetness spill over his hand and his muscles tighten, his own release came a second later with a aroused snarl. He just stayed there for a moment, gazing at his lover, wondering how he'd got so damn lucky, eventually Joshua opened his eyes

"What?" he asked a very satisfied grin spreading across his face,

"You are so fucking beautiful" he stated and slid out so he could lay beside him, Joshua seemed uncomfortable at this and went to get up, not looking Vilkas in the eye "hey" Vilkas said, his voice full of concern "what's wrong? Did I do something wrong?" he just shook his head and looked down at Vilkas's hand on his arm

"Hey, look at me" he said sitting up and turning the Elf's head. He was shocked to see tears in his eyes "Joshua, you're scaring me, what's upset you?" he asked desperately "did I hurt you? Was I too rough?"

"No" Joshua croaked "That was amazing, incredible, I'm just a little emotional that's all, and what you said" the tears started to fall then, Vilkas just held him, quite touched their tryst had affected the Elf so deeply, when they stopped Joshua snuggled down into Vilkas arms 

"You will stay the night won't you?" he said hopefully

"Of course" Vilkas said settling him in comfortably and dozing off to sleep.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

He woke up the next morning and for a second wondered where he was, soon enough recollection of the previous evening flooded in, he reached out for Joshua and found only empty bed, then he heard the sounds of talking coming from downstairs. He climbed out of bed and slipped into trousers then he went to investigate "....came out of nowhere, an’ lopped its head off. Scared the shit out of me, bloody glad he did though, I felt sure I was going to see Nocturnal that day. Told him I owed him, if there was ever anything I could do, don't hesitate. We met up in Markarth recently....."

"Markarth?" Joshua questioned

"Yeah, I was up there um....shall we say, on assignment" he grinned "and he asked me if I could do him this favour, I said 'Course I will, anything for you' and here we are" Vilkas cleared his throat "Oh hey Vil, didn't see you there, I guess he came home then eh" the thief grinned cheekily, "so you don't need me"

"No" Vilkas said "but thanks"

"Hey like I said you ever need anything, you come see me first okay, you saved my life man, least I can do" he said turning for the door, he paused and looked at them

"One thing Vil, that Aela, she seeing anyone at the moment" he asked "she's a woman a man could get crazy over"

"Not as far as I know, nothing serious anyway" Vilkas replied "but Cynric...." the thief grinned

"I know, I know she'll eat me alive" he said turning and heading for the door, "but what a way to go" he said cheekily as he opened the door and went into Whiterun, leaving the lovers alone.


	5. Adventures With Thalmor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua returns from the Embassy and needs comfort, which Vilkas is happy to provide

Vilkas was annoyed, he was trying to sit quietly in the Jorrvaskr main hall and have a Mead, but that damn Breton whelp with a crush Laette would not leave him be. He ignored her but she kept touching him and asking him questions about her sword technique. All Vilkas wanted to do was worry, in private. Definitely not talk to her about her lack of talent when it came to the sword, Farkas seemed to sense his brother’s annoyance and came over 

"You're needed in the Underforge" he said and started toward the door "Now brother" he said. Vilkas excused himself and followed.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they got down into the Underforge it was deserted, Vilkas looked at Farkas confused "I thought you said I was needed in here" he said looking around. Farkas sat on the floor and leaned against the wall

"You looked like you needed rescuing" he grinned "that or she did", then more seriously he said "You're worried, I can tell" Vilkas sighed and sat down with his brother

"He left more than three weeks ago, to go to that damned Embassy, I've heard nothing, Inigo's heard nothing, nobody's heard anything. I thought about going to Markarth to see if that damned Thalmor knew anything but I don't want to leave in case he comes back, you know" Farkas could hear the fear and worry in his voice, he couldn't hide anything from him, he clasped his hand over his brothers

"He can take care of himself, by the sounds of it he has been for some time" he said reassuringly

"But this is the damn Thalmor we're talking about Farkie, they're....." he left the rest unsaid, everyone had heard about what the Thalmor were capable of

"Aye, but remember this is also Joshua we're talking about, the man amazing enough to win my brothers heart, he'll be ok" Farkas got up and put his hand down to pull Vilkas up, "Now go to bed before you do something that Laette will regret" he ordered with a smile.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas had managed to get through the mead hall and down to his room before Laette caught up with him, she'd had a few drinks and was obviously feeling brave, because she stood outside his door, leaning against the doorpost while he tidied the things he'd left on his bed, 

"Well, I'm pretty tired" he said in his usual gruff tone

"You look tense" she said with a sultry tone "I could help with that, I'm very good at massage" she smiled

"Thanks but no" Vilkas said firmly "I'm very tired and it would be inappropriate, me being your superior and instructor"

"I won't tell anyone if you don't" she promised "I can be very discrete". 

'Gods, get the hint, no!' he thought angrily, his eyes must have flashed because the look quickly changed to fear and she left, Vilkas slammed the door behind her, 'Brazen Hussy' he thought "Oh well hopefully that will be the end of it" he mumbled to himself as he settled into bed. His mind was reeling with thoughts of Joshua and what he was doing, where he was, was he ok? His sleep when it finally came was a mixture of bad dreams about Thalmor dungeons.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

A presence in his room woke him some time later. 'Laette!' he thought 

"Divines sake, take the hint" he said as he turned over "I'm not interested, I'm.....Joshua?" he said as he realised it wasn't a small Breton woman in his room, it was a tall Altmer man. He looked haunted, broken, he turned towards the door

"I'm sorry, I just really needed to see you, this was a bad idea, I'll go" he muttered "Sorry I woke you I know you struggle to sleep, sorry" Vilkas was off the bed and beside him before he managed to get the door open

"No, I'm the one who's sorry, I thought you were Laette, stay please" he said taking Joshua back to the bed

"Who's Laette?" Joshua asked, 'did I just see Jealousy flash in his eyes' Vilkas thought, a warm feeling spreading through him

"An annoying whelp" Vilkas explained "a Breton, Farkie thinks she has a crush on me, she offered me a massage" he teased although something in Joshua's sad smile made him ache "what's wrong baby, tell me. Did they hurt you at the Embassy?"

"Not me no" Joshua said and snuggled himself into Vilkas's arms "Someone else though". Vilkas knew he needed comfort so he indicated that Joshua should take off his coat and trousers and get into bed where he would be warmer, he mindlessly obeyed, almost like a Zombie. Once they were settled in bed he said

"Who did they hurt baby?"

"A Breton called Etienne and a Bosmer girl.....never did find out her name, strange" he paused for a moment to ponder this and then continued "I went into the dungeons during my search, mainly looking for a way out, and I found them imprisoned, Etienne was chained to a wall, like a fucking animal. I got them both out and the Bosmer girl said she had friends, family, something nearby and thanks and then left. I don't think she'd been in prison that long, Etienne was a different story, he was a mess, one arm broken, the other dislocated. Burns and cuts all over him, evidence of him being healed, poor bastard. I got him outside and down to the local inn, I healed him a bit before we left just enough for him to travel and he completely freaked out and tried to attack me, reminded me a bit of you actually, defiant to the end, but when I explained who I was he allowed me to heal him. We took a room for the night, bitch told me she only had one and that my 'boyfriend' would have to sleep on my bedroll on the floor, I told her threateningly that he would sleep wherever I wanted him to, it did the job, her attitude changed and she couldn't be more helpful" Vilkas tensed, jealousy raged through him uncontrollably, Joshua seemed to sense this because he stroked Vilkas chest "you have nothing to worry about, I'm yours" he said "I slept on the bedroll on the floor, the poor bastard needed a comfortable rest, I wasn't sleeping much anyway between my own thoughts and his whimpering because of nightmares, I spent most of the night sitting on the edge of the bed holding his hand. The next morning he was slightly stronger and my magic had recovered, so I healed him, it must have taken more than I expected because I passed out, Woke up in Markarth, in Ondolemar's quarters, apparently I'd told him that my friend lived there when we escaped, so he took me there. Stayed with me too, much to Ondolemar's annoyance. When I was rested, I accompanied him back to Riften, turns out you and he have a mutual friend, Cynric. I left him there with him, took care of some business and came straight home to you. And woke you, when you have so much trouble sleeping, see this is what I mean, I'm selfish, I only thought of myself, I......" Vilkas kissed him gently

"Should shut up" he said with a kind smile "I'm very glad you came, I was worried. Did you get what you needed?"

"Yeah, they don't know any more than Delphine does, gods I hate her, self righteous bitch" he spat "did get something helpful from Etienne though" he said 

"What?" asked Vilkas his wolf becoming agitated at that man's name, 'what was it with Bretons annoying him today?'

"An old man in a sewer in Riften, turned out to know Delphine, so once I got him away from the sewer filled with dead Thalmor I put him on a cart to Riverwood, caught a lift as far as Whiterun. Paid the driver double not to stop for anything, so he should be alright, my selfish side rearing it's ugly head again, probably should have gone with him then come back, just......"

"Just what?" Vilkas asked

"Just couldn't wait to see you" Joshua gave him a small smile

"So....doesn't matter, forget I said anything" Vilkas said

"So....what? And don't say it doesn't matter because you wanted to say something and that makes it matter to me"

"You saw Ondolemar" he said not able to keep the pain from his voice

"Yes, my old friend was kind enough to provide me with the potions I needed and a place to rest quietly without interruptions" he looked up at Vilkas with concern "you have nothing to be jealous about, I...I would never be unfaithful to you, ever!" he said firmly "now get those thoughts out of your head, Ondolemar and I are over, we've been over for a very long time. I'm with you and only you" he kissed his chest gently and put his head back down

"Lydia didn't seem to think it was over" he said, he hated saying it, afraid Joshua would leave, but he just snuggled in closer

"She say I slept with him" he asked

"She said you shared your bed with him, and I took it to mean, in the context it was said, that you two were intimate" he said

"I'm not going to lie to you, I needed comfort and Ondolemar provided it, that's all, he shared my grief. He loved her too" Joshua said flatly

"Was he your first?" his mouth asked before he could stop it

"Yes and yes, as in, yes he was my first love and yes he was my first lover" Joshua answered "I know you're next question so I'll answer it and save time" Vilkas could hear the grin in his voice "He chose the Dominion and I chose vengeance, neither one of us chose the other" his voice trailed off with the last few words and he was quiet for a while, seemingly lost in a memory. They talked for a while longer about Joshua's trip and the job that Vilkas had done while he was away, before long though Joshua was struggling to keep his eyes open

"Let sleep take you, my beautiful mage" Vilkas said quietly, Joshua mumbled something and dozed of to sleep, Vilkas laid for a while just enjoying holding his lover until sleep took him too.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The following morning there was a knock at the door, it opened without waiting for an enter and Laette appeared "Skjor told me to come and get you 'up'" she said, emphasising the up, Vilkas presumed she thought she was flirting, he gave her an angry look and gestured back to the bed where Joshua still lay sleeping, his ordeal having taken more out of him than it first seemed. He'd slept fitfully calling out for Ilianna and Vilkas, he sounded frightened and now he was sleeping peacefully and Vilkas wanted that to continue for as long as possible. 

"Tell Skjor to find someone else to train you" he hissed at her his voice no louder than a whisper, 

"Who's that?" she whispered with a jealous tone, he didn't see or hear Joshua sit up so it made him jump slightly when he said in a haughty tone

"I fail to see how, Who I am and What my relationship is to Vilkas is any of your business, and I believe he didn't give you permission to enter, so I suggest you leave, now" Laette looked at Vilkas with shock but turned quickly and left, Vilkas turned to the bed and saw Joshua grinning cheekily, 

"Sorry, she just rubs me up the wrong way, that was rude I'll apologise on my way out"

"No, I was just....you sounded like Ondolemar" Vilkas burst out laughing, Joshua laughed too

"Yes, quite a good imitation I thought, whenever I want to intimidate someone with words I conjure up my inner Ondolemar." he grinned again "that I take it that was the famous Laette" he said. Vilkas rolled his eyes

"Yes" he said "although I think the crush might be over, thank the Divines" he said looking at the ceiling as he got back into bed to show Joshua just how much he'd missed him.


	6. The Price of Revenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas wants vengeance, but will the cost be too high
> 
> Minor spoilers, Companions questline

The door to Jorrvaskr mead hall slammed open and a armoured Husky entered ran around and when it spotted him straight up to Vilkas, at sight of her he immediately relaxed slightly. A few seconds later an Altmer and a Khajiit entered and the Altmer stalked across the room to his lover stopping only once when Ria approached him to tell him that now was not a good time, he silenced her with a icy glare, 'invoking his inner Ondolemar' Vilkas thought to himself, fussing the Dogs head, 

"Are you injured?” Vilkas just stared at him blankly, fussing Bran "Vilkas, answer me, are you injured?" he asked again, this time the haughty Altmer tone snapped him back

"No" he said "I wasn't, Josh, they....." he looked at Joshua lost

"It's ok Vil, I'm going to leave you for a second I need to go help the others okay, I'll just be over there with Athis", he gestured to the injured Dunmer, Vilkas saw that Inigo was already trying to tend him but his skills were not sufficient, he nodded numbly "I'll be back before you know it, just stay strong baby," he said and kissed the Nord's hand. A few Companions saw this small gesture and looked at each other in shock, Vilkas was not one for public shows of affection and although the Circle knew of their relationship it was not common knowledge amongst the rest. He stood and made his way over to Athis and Inigo

"I'm sorry, my healing skills are inadequate" he said as Joshua approached

"Its okay" he smiled at the Khajiit "You are still learning, you've done well" this seemed to please him and he moved so Joshua could get to the injured Elf 

"It's okay Athis, we'll have this healed in no time, you'll be okay" he said quietly, his hands started to glow and the wound closed and healed not even leaving a scar

"Thank you Joshua, I don't know what to say" the Dunmer said

"Nothing needed" Joshua smiled "but I need to get back to..." he stopped as he turned and saw his lovers lost face, 'you understand', Vilkas thought as he looked into his eyes, he became aware of someone touching him and turned to see Laette had sat next to him,

"We have to be there for each other, Shield siblings" she said raising her hand and touched his cheek,

"Shield siblings" he murmured quietly as if the concept was alien, a second later the moment was gone and he shook her hands off him and stood walking towards Joshua with purpose "I need to talk to you, in private" he growled and started to stride towards the door, which was still open, he stopped when he realised he was alone "Follow!" he barked and Joshua just smiled slightly and he and Inigo shared a look before Joshua followed Vilkas out of the door.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was cool and dark in the Underforge the only place that they could be alone, Vilkas threw himself into Joshua's arms and felt them encircle him and hold him tightly "They killed Kodlak" he said numbly "First Skjor and now Kodlak, I need....I need vengeance" he looked at Joshua, a haunted look in his eyes, his grief evident

"I understand baby, trust me probably better than most" he said "but you have to understand, vengeance costs and it might not be a price you're willing to pay"

"For Kodlak, no price is too high" he tore himself out of Joshua's arms and paced

"It can cost you your soul, who you are" Joshua said quietly

"You said you chose vengeance" he hissed angrily, he was sure Joshua would understand

"I did and it changed me, didn't make me feel any better and I've got to live with what I've done for the rest of my life, can you do that?" Joshua's anger flared, the door to the Underforge opened and they were joined by Aela and Farkas, Vilkas was still angry and growled at them, to Joshua's surprise Aela snarled back, Farkas spoke

"None of that, please, For Kodlak, he always hated when you two fought" the grief was evident in his brothers voice, Vilkas was guilty and it seemed so was Aela as she hugged Farkas in a comforting gesture that was so unusual, Vilkas grief returned when Kodlak was mentioned, it burned and he wanted it to stop but he knew it wouldn't

"We should avenge Kodlak, take the fight to them, to their home" he spat angrily

"I agree with Vilkas" Aela said her tone matching his "They must pay"

"Kodlak didn't agree with vengeance, he wouldn't have wanted this" Farkas mumbled quietly still being held by Aela "you know that". Unfortunately Vilkas wasn't listening and his anger was infecting Aela like a virus,

"Vilkas is right Farkas, they invaded our home, killed.....killed the best of us that cannot go unpunished", Farkas sighed

"Well, I'll have nothing to do with it, go, destroy yourselves in some pointless quest for revenge, where does it end Vil, when does it stop, when there are none of us and none of them left? Hmm?"

"Fine, I'll go alone then, stay here and protect Jorrvaskr" he snapped angrily and stormed out of the Underforge,

"I am going to accompany my Shield Brother" Aela said as she turned to follow, "Perhaps it is for the best you stay and protect Jorrvaskr in case they return".

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas was surprised to see three figures waiting for him as he came outside, when he approached the group he looked at Joshua questioningly "If you think I'm letting you go on this quest for revenge alone you can think again" he said "You need a healer and a mage, I am both"

"I thought you didn't agree with this?" Vilkas asked his heart healed a little at Joshua's presence

"I don't. But that said I can't let you two go running off angry like you are, you'll get yourselves killed". They walked in silence down to the gate, Joshua spoke to the guard, who he seemed to know

"Thank you, love" Vilkas said quietly once they had cleared the boundary of Whiterun

"For what?" Joshua asked idly bending to take the stick Bran had brought him to play,

"For this, I know you don't agree with it, and you have no reason to do it, you're not a Companion" Vilkas looked at Joshua and was surprised to see hurt,

"I'm your companion" he said quietly "I thought you knew that, I'm not going to let you get yourself killed when I could do something to prevent it"

"I.....I appreciate it" Vilkas said, Inigo's voice was heard then warning them there were bandits ahead. The rest of the journey was quiet, Joshua and Inigo insisted they camped and rested when night fell, Vilkas was angry, he wanted to kill them, now, but Aela agreed so he had no choice. Soon enough though they were at Driftshade Refuge, 

"Aela and I will take out the sentry guards, stay here" Inigo ordered in a hushed voice, then he turned to Aela "Are you ready my little Snow Flower" he asked with a grin. Aela rolled her eyes and growled at him, but dropped down into a sneaky stance and followed the Khajiit. The lovers sat in silence for a while, contemplating what they were about to undertake, eventually Vilkas spoke

"My little Snow Flower?" he asked with an eyebrow raised, Joshua grinned

"Not his worst, trust me" he said "Inigo will chase anything in a skirt, he seems to have no fear of rejection, gets him lovers though, Taarie in Solitude seemed to have a very good time" he grinned "gave him the pair of trousers he wears and even smiled"

"That stuck up Altmer in the clothes shop" Vilkas asked

"Yeah, Inigo's like me though it'll take a special woman to tie him down, no attachments, no strings", Vilkas sagged, 'Gods, I hate being so damn needy' he thought, Joshua noticed, he put his hand on Vilkas's arm and smiled at him 

"Hey, I found mine" he said, Vilkas turned to him and smiled, it had none of its usual vigour

"Did you just call me a woman?" he asked, he saw the orange tint appear on Joshua's face 

"No...I mean....No..." Vilkas kissed him

"I know what you meant" he said, at that moment they heard Inigo and Aela returning, it seemed his Shield Sister was impressed by his skill with the bow.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Driftshade Refuge was as you would expect Vilkas realised he'd never seen Joshua fight before and when he saw him drop a Silver Hand with a duel Ice Spike, he had to admit he was impressed, but then Joshua had two more advancing on him, Vilkas felt a cold stab in his heart as he realised he would not be able to get to his lover in time, then Joshua shouted something in a language Vilkas didn't recognise and the two were flung against the wall, one was impaled on one of the disgusting trophy's that adorned the wall, the other was staggering to his feet, terror on his face as the Altmer bore down on him

“Don't bother to get up, you sick bastard, perhaps I should take your head and display it, how do you feel about that" he said in a tone that was disgusted, angry

"Werewolf scum" he spat at Joshua, although the fear still evident

"Wrong!" Joshua said, "Dragonborn!" the Silver Hand screamed as Joshua cast a Firebolt and set him alight, he didn't wait to watch the man die, he turned on his heel and with hands still burning he looked at them, his eyes had a darkness, Vilkas didn't like the way he looked or sounded but his Wolf was howling for blood and he was finding it difficult to control it, then he spoke 

"Is this what you wanted Vilkas, I told you vengeance has a price, are you ready to pay?" he demanded his eyes flashed, Aela moved to intervene but Inigo stopped her "Well," Joshua demanded "I'm waiting" he growled, 

Vilkas snarled his anger and grief over Kodlak's death overwhelmed him and he could no longer fight the change as the wolf burst forth from within, he let out a howl and looked at Joshua, the atmosphere was heavy 

"Right, let's do this" Joshua said. The rest of the hideout was a wash of blood and fire, Vilkas felt free, the lust for blood running through him, the mage that fought beside him seemed to feel the same, his breathing was heavy and there was something in his scent, something strange that he had never noticed before, they were in the final room when Vilkas felt a sharp, burning pain in his chest, Joshua's face turned to horror and he sent his attacker to Oblivion with a well placed Ice Spike, by the time he reached him Vilkas was man again and bleeding heavily from a large hole in his chest, he was vaguely aware of Joshua's frightened voice 

"Inigo, my pack, get the potions, quickly. Aela stand guard, let nothing near him, I can't protect him and heal him" he heard his Shield Sister confirming and felt his head being lifted into Joshua's familiar lap "Stay with me Vilkas, don't you die on me you stubborn bastard. Inigo where are those fucking potions I need magic now!" 

"They were at the bottom, you really should think about packing your bag a little more carefully my friend" the Khajiit said handing Joshua a couple of vials

"Really? You want to do this now, right now?" he said downing the first of the vials, "Is this all there is?" he said

"Yes I am sorry, those were all I could find"

"Shit" Joshua muttered, "It's okay my love, I'll save you, just stay with me, don't give up" his voice almost had a begging note, Vilkas felt himself drifting and growing drowsy but he fought the urge to sleep, then he felt the warmth of Joshua's healing magic flowing through him and his chest didn't hurt any more, it stopped for a second although Vilkas already felt stronger, a moment later the warmth returned and he heard Joshua's voice "You're going to be fine, just stay with me" it was weak and seemed very far away, with the mixture of shock, blood loss and the warmth of the magic Vilkas could hold back no longer and drifted into unconsciousness.


	7. Confessions and Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being Dragonborn isn't always easy, as Vilkas finds out

Vilkas awoke some time later, the cold of the floor finally making it's way into his unconsciousness, his foot knocked one of the discarded potion bottles and the lap he was resting his head on jolted, a hand shot out and grabbed the Ebony Bow beside them on the floor, unfortunately it was the wrong way, Vilkas shifted slightly in the lap and looked up, he smiled at the confused look on his lovers face, 

"I'm not an expert in these things" he grinned at him "but I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be the other way round and you're a piece missing" he indicated the quiver Inigo had left, Joshua smiled weakly

"You're awake, how are you feeling?" he asked, his voice little more than a whisper

"Better than you I'd wager, baby you look awful, what happened?" his recollection of events was cloudy, almost like watched through a veil

"You were stabbed in the chest" he said, Vilkas's hand went to the place the wound had been but found only a scar "Yeah, sorry about that, I ran out of magic, took everything I had just to save you" he said "I can fix that later" he murmured. He'd fallen asleep again and Vilkas moved himself to sit beside the exhausted Elf, his lover, his love. This man who'd sacrificed everything to come with him on his mission of vengeance, he cupped Joshua's cheek 'I love you' he thought, his lover seemed to read his mind because he murmured Vilkas name and leaned into the small gesture of affection. He opened his eyes and focused on Vilkas, he raised his hand and stroked his cheek 

"Can you see my pack anywhere?" he asked hoarsely, Vilkas looked around and spotted it not far away he leaned over and passed it to him, he tutted and then found what he was looking for, a small green bottle "wake me up" he said as he drank it and shuddered at the bitter taste, a few moments later the potion took effect and he was looking much more awake. "How are you feeling?" he asked "You lost quite a lot of blood", 

"Pretty damn good considering, thanks to you" he leaned in and gave Joshua a loving kiss, the mage winced slightly at the touch "You're hurt" he said and Joshua winced again

"Not so loud please, my head is pounding" he whispered

"Did you knock it, or injure it?" Vilkas was worried, head injures could be serious

"No, it'll be fine soon" he assured the worried Nord with a small smile "consequence of depleting my magic reserves" he added

"You did that for me?" Vilkas asked so touched by the sacrifice, Joshua's face became serious

"I would walk into Oblivion to save you" he said seriously "I would die for you, Vilkas. In fact...." he looked away his words trailing off

"In fact" Vilkas probed "In fact what? Josh, tell me....Joshua?", he gently lifted his head and found he'd passed out again Vilkas stroked his cheek and called his name quietly, soon he saw his eyes open "thank the Gods" Vilkas murmured, then in a sudden moment of recklessness so unlike him, usually he was the level headed twin, Farkas was the one known for acting on instinct. His heart was beating wildly, "Joshua" he said, looking into those amazing eyes "I love you", the Elf's eyes widened slightly and then filled with tears

"No Vilkas, you don't" he said quietly "You can't, you don't even know me, you know what I let you know, nothing more"

"Then tell me" Vilkas begged devastated by Joshua's reaction to his declaration. He looked like he wasn't going to elaborate then he sighed,

"I went to see her, after it happened, they finally allowed me and when I got there...." the memory was obviously painful as tears started to flow but he continued "she didn't even know me, she was like a Dwemer automaton, she just stared through me, that beautiful light was gone from her eyes, Ondolemar was there, supporting me, thank the Divines, before I left I conjured her a Fire Rose, 'just like you taught me' I told her, she just stared, even after it died and we were leaving she still stared at where it had been, like she was trying to hold on to it. That night, Ondolemar and I were together for the first time, Afterwards, while he slept I left, I couldn't involve him in what I was about to do, he'd joined the Dominion by then and I wasn't about to mess up his life too" he stopped seemingly reluctant to continue, Vilkas squeezed his hand supportively,

"It's okay my love, you can tell me anything, you know my deepest secret and yet you half kill yourself to save me, it won't change how I feel" Joshua sighed

"I went to the secret Embassy on Morrowind, the one where they'd taken her" he looked at Vilkas "I know the Dominion has no official presence there, I did say secret base, I entered and when I fought the first Thalmor guard a haze came over me, I can't remember anything after that, when the haze cleared everywhere I looked was dead bodies and I knew somehow that I'd done that, I felt sick, probably was, as I left I emptied all the flammable alchemical substances on to the floor and threw a fireball at them, you could see the blaze for miles, apparently. I heard later it was described as beautiful" he laughed without humour "I disgust myself, you should get away from me Vilkas, far away, before I mess you up like I did Ondolemar"

"He seems fine to me" Vilkas said with what he hoped was an encouraging tone, Joshua laughed again

"He wasn't always like that, he used to be sweet, kind, caring, I did that to him, I built the wall that surrounds him now and it seems I hadn't finished hurting him either because I, as Lydia so tactfully put it, 'shared my bed with him' even though I knew I was falling in love with you", Vilkas waited for a moment for him to continue but it seemed that was the end of it, he sighed

"I can't forgive you for Ondolemar, only he can do that and considering he gave you and an escaped Thalmor prisoner who you'd liberated a safe place to rest I'd say he has. As for the other thing," he looked at the dead Silver Hand he had ripped apart moments before being stabbed "I am in no position to judge. I love you Joshua" he said and kissed him gently, he was very relieved when he returned the kiss with equal tenderness

"I love you too Vilkas" he said "It nearly ripped me apart when I thought she'd killed you"

"You'd never let that happen" Vilkas whispered putting his forehead against Joshua's. "You wouldn't happen to know where my armour is do you?" he grinned cheekily, "Only I seem to have misplaced it" Joshua returned his grin

"If you insist on putting it on, it's over there. Inigo brought it through for you, he also repaired it the best he could with the parts available" Vilkas was touched by the Khajiits kindness and got up and put his armour back on, returning Joshua's coat to him, Inigo had done a fair job for a field repair and it at least could be done up, this done he helped Joshua to his feet and put his pack on, 

"How's your head" he asked as they exited the hideout

"Still sore but getting better" he said, opening the door and allowing the light in.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

As soon as they got outside the sounds of the fight came to their ears, they both rushed down until they saw.....a Dragon! Aela and Inigo were confidently fighting the beast and they were winning, it seemed Inigo had acquired a new Bow from somewhere, Joshua dropped to his knees mumbling

"Oh Gods not now, please Meridia, not now" but it seemed that his prayer, if heard was not answered because a moment or two later with a crash, the Dragon was felled, almost crushing Aela, most certainly would have had Inigo's reactions been slower. The skin started to cackle and flake disintegrating into energy, which all flowed into Joshua, as the band of energy hit him he dropped forward, Vilkas went to catch him and found Inigo was already there, supporting him

"It is over my friend" he said "do not worry, soon all will be well", expertly he removed his own and Joshua's packs and opened his removing a bottle, he manoeuvred himself behind him and leant him back onto his chest, Joshua whimpered as if in terrible pain when he was moved "I know, this will help" he put the bottle to his lips, 

"What are you giving him?" Vilkas demanded snapping out of his shocked state

"This potion will sap his energy, make him sleep" Inigo explained while helping Joshua

"That's a poison" Vilkas said angrily "in his weakened state you could kill him"

"It hasn't yet" snapped Inigo "this is not our first time", Joshua was out for about an hour, Vilkas felt a squeeze of his hand and a weak smile when he looked at him, once fully awake, he declared himself well enough to travel to Dawnstar.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Aela and Inigo walked a few paces in front of the lovers as they travelled, the late afternoon sun was warm and with no snow the walk was pleasant, they chatted 

"So how did you and Joshua become friends?" Aela asked, Inigo seemed reluctant to talk, Vilkas felt Joshua squeeze his hand

"Inigo and I were hired for the same assassination job" he said

"Yes, I understand, a mission such as that would make you close" she answered

"No, not the mission my enchanting Skyrim Wolf, I tried to kill my friend to gain myself all the reward money, my friend forgave me". Aela stood, turned and looked at Joshua

"He was addicted to Skooma at the time," he explained "I've been through some dark times myself"

"I see, are you brotherhood?" she asked and Inigo and Joshua shared a grin. 

"I fail to see how that is funny, the Dark Brotherhood is not a laughing matter" she chastised sternly

"No my sultry enchantress, but the fact that, in Skyrim at least, there is no Brotherhood" he said "they attempted to recruit my friend here, not a wise plan"

"You wiped them out?" Aela asked the two friends

"Yes," Joshua replied "With a little help from the Empire"

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was early evening when they reached Dawnstar and although he denied it Joshua looked exhausted, when they entered the Innkeeper looked up 

"Divines Joshua, you look terrible, another Dragon attack?"

"Hi Thoring," he said, mustering up a tired smile "yeah, any rooms?"

"I've only got two, is that okay?" he said, Aela looked up

"That will be fine," she said "and some food if possible"

"Coming right up, here's your keys," Joshua took his and said "Don't worry about food for me, I'm just going to bed" and he walked off towards the room indicated. Vilkas stood and watched him go, once the room door was closed he requested that Thoring ignore him and serve him some, he'd take it in. 

They bought some mead and was sat at a table, then there was a horrible noise coming from the bar 

"What in Oblivion is that?" he asked and could tell that Aela was thinking the same thing

"Karita, the inn owners daughter, she fancies herself a bard" Inigo said with a grin "Thoring thinks she has a beautiful voice" he said, Aela snorted "I agree my sweet" he smiled at her. They were disturbed by Thoring bringing their food, Vilkas tried to pay him but he refused, 

"Your money's no good here, we owe Joshua, he has saved the town from Dragons a couple of times and he helped Erandur, least we can do is offer a warm bed and some food" he smiled and walked away, Vilkas picked up his and Joshua's and took it through into his room. He was awake and smiled at Vilkas as he came in,

"I said I wasn't hungry" he grinned "but that does smell good", he took the bowl but refused the bread. "So how are you?" he asked more seriously "feel any better"

"Not really" Vilkas admitted, "I suppose it's going to take time", Joshua nodded and then winced "You're head still bad?" he asked leaning over and stroking the side of his lovers head

"Will be until the energy has done what it does" Joshua said "You sharing my room tonight?" he asked hopefully

"Mhmm" Vilkas said lost in the beauty of his lover’s eyes

"You sure Aela will be okay with that?" he asked with a grin

"She can handle herself, even with a horny Khajiit" he grinned back

"Inigo can be quite persuasive" Joshua said "I've seen him tame tougher beasts than Aela" Bran shifted and grumbled in her sleep "See, even Bran agrees"

"Then I wish him luck" smiled Vilkas, climbing onto the bed and taking his lover in his arms, "Now time for you to sleep" he said kissing him gently on the head and stroking his hair until he was sleeping peacefully.


	8. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua comes home to find Vilkas sat very cosy with Laette and he's not happy about it

Vilkas was sat on the back porch of Jorrvaskr looking out at the rain, it had been pouring for three days and showed no signs of letting up, he didn't mind though, the miserable weather matched his miserable mood. He hadn't seen Joshua since Dawnstar over a month ago having left him there to rest, Vilkas and Aela had returned to Whiterun to attend Kodlak's funeral and his grief had returned with full force once he'd left the Altmers loving, comforting presence. 

After the funeral they had discussed Kodlak's last wish and as a group decided to do what they could to cleanse his soul and allow his admittance to Sovenguard, Aela could not understand but agreed that if that was what Kodlak wanted, that was what they must do. So they travelled and collected what they needed, and took it with them to the Hall of Heroes, eventually cleansing him, well Farkas and Aela did, he felt that he was unworthy, because he'd allowed vengeance to consume him, maybe this is part of the cost that Joshua had spoken of. Joshua, just thinking about him made his heart hurt, he wondered where he was, if he was okay, he'd returned to Whiterun while they were away and left again to go Gods knew where, Lydia certainly hadn't, but that was Joshua, slow to trust, but he trusted him, this thought made his Wolf growl happily. The noise of the door opening made him snap his head round, hoping as he had for a few days, that his love had returned to him, it wasn't, it was just Laette, she hadn't really bothered him that much since finding Joshua in his bed, but as time passed and he didn't return it had started up again, his wolf growled but Vilkas managed to keep it under control

"What do you want Laette?" he snarled at her, 'Gods' he thought 'can't a man be miserable in peace'

"I just came out to give you this and see if you wanted some company?" 'Yes!' thought Vilkas 'it's just not you I want it from'. He decided to say nothing and she wrongly took his silence as he wanted company and she sat down closer than Vilkas was comfortable with, 

"When is this horrible weather going to end I wonder" she said, he just grunted. She placed a hand on his leg, "you know, I can think of a better rainy afternoon activity than sitting out here moping" she whispered huskily, Vilkas was about to reply when he heard a familiar voice behind them

"Well, isn't this cosy" it said coldly, Vilkas jumped and turned to see Joshua's hurt expression briefly before he turned and walked briskly away. Vilkas went to follow when he felt Laette's hand on his arm stopping him, he turned and snarled at her, she jumped slightly letting go of his arm

"Look" he said "I don't like you, I have no interest in sleeping with you. In fact, I'm in love with ..."

"He's just using you" she spat defensively "and he not one of us, a Companion. He goes away, not thinking of you at all, then he swans in like a typical Thalmor and expects you to drop everything"

"He is not a Thalmor!" Vilkas growled defensively

"Oh no, well he certainly has a lot of visits from them not to be one of them. A Justicar visited him while you were away, the same one who came before" she said, almost seeming triumphant the look didn't last long though as Vilkas snarled at her, and looked like he was going to rip her apart, at that moment Farkas came out and immediately felt the atmosphere

"Everything okay here?" he asked, knowing the answer, but asking anyway. When he got no reply, he said "did Josh find you Vil? He's back in town" he said his brother growled at Laette, and then turned and started to walk into Whiterun, "Where you going?" Farkas asked

"Out!" Vilkas replied the snarl still evident.

Joshua opened the door but just stood there, towel still in hand, and looked at Vilkas, the betrayal he felt obvious on his face, 

"You've got it...that wasn't what it...Can I come inside so we can talk about this?" he asked, Joshua said nothing but he turned and walked into the house without closing the door, Vilkas followed closing the door quietly, Inigo came in wearing his cloak obviously intending to venture outside 

"I shall leave you two to talk" he said to Joshua, who murmured he understood but said no coherent words, the Khajiit touched his friends arm "remember what I said my friend" he said quietly and left to run his errands. The two stood in silence for a moment until Vilkas could stand it no more

"Nothing happened baby, I promise you" he said trying to take Joshua in his arms but he pulled away "Joshua, please you have to believe me" his voice was pleading and he didn't care

"Really, I do, do I" he said finally "well as you may have noticed I don't take orders very well" he went upstairs and came back down a few moments later wearing dry clothes, he put the tea kettle on and put the filled linen bags ready for the hot water, when he didn't speak again Vilkas broke the silence

"I hear you had a visit from Ondolemar" he said quietly, Joshua's eyes flashed angrily

"Don't try to justify you cozying up with some floozy because I had a visit from an old friend" he snapped

"An old lover" Vilkas snarled before he could stop himself, Joshua's eyes narrowed

"I think it's best that you leave" he said coldly "after all you're missing out on a wonderful rainy day activity" Vilkas understood from his tone that the conversation was over, and left him in peace.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

That evening he was sitting outside, the rain had stopped and Laette, Ria and Farkas were training in the yard, he was sat looking towards Breezehome wondering if Joshua had calmed down enough to talk when Ria's voice broke his thoughts 

"Stop bloody showing off" she snapped "he's not watching you anyway", he turned to see Farkas helping her up, pulling her a little closer than he needed to. Vilkas smiled to himself, he'd noticed the attraction between the two of them developing over the last couple of weeks and he approved, Ria was a nice girl, she'd be good for his brother. He was just pondering this when a familiar sound floated to him across the wind, Joshua's Lute, he was obviously sitting on the Anvil, he jumped up and almost ran out of the yard, the three companions just watched him go, he heard Laette say something but he didn't hear what, he really needed to speak to Joshua, as he reached the top of the stairs he was greeted by an excited Bran,

"I'm still angry about it" Joshua stated "I..."

"I'm sorry" Vilkas said cutting him off, "Please, you don't have to talk to me, just listen", Joshua said nothing so he continued "I have no interest whatsoever in her, why would I want her when I've got you. I don't even like females, I can't...." Joshua looked up from the Forge, Vilkas could tell he was going to make them say it, he sighed "I can't satisfy them" he said quietly

"I don't know, she looked pretty satisfied as I left" he said, his tone cold, like he was talking to a stranger, not his lover

"Please Josh, I can't lose you" he begged, Joshua's head snapped up,

"What?" he laughed and the tension left his body "Divines Vil, you are the most intense person I know, you make Ondolemar seem relaxed in comparison". Vilkas walked over and stood in front of him, looking down at this beautiful Elf, who was gazing up at him adoringly 

"So you're still mine then?" he asked huskily, he was quickly becoming aroused, it had been such a long time since he'd been this close to him

"Till the end of time my love" he said, Vilkas leaned down and almost devoured him, Joshua groaned with desire "spend the night with me" he gasped when Vilkas pulled away

"Nowhere I'd rather be". They called Bran and started down the steps and to Joshua's surprise Vilkas took his hand, he stopped on the stairs "What?" Vilkas asked looking at him concerned, Joshua just looked at their hands, fingers still interlinked

"I thought we were keeping this low key" he said smiling but not taking his hand away

"When did we decide that?" Vilkas grinned "because if it was when you had your gorgeous body wrapped around me I'm afraid my mind was elsewhere"

"I just thought you would prefer that" he explained, looking a little self conscious, obviously not a feeling he was familiar with, although apparently neither was jealousy and it seemed he'd felt that full bore that afternoon

"Why?" Vilkas asked still a little confused

"People gossip and I thought you wouldn't want to be the subject of it" he said staring at the floor. Vilkas was so touched by this, he pulled his lover into his arms and kissed him gently but passionately

"That is very sweet" he said "but I..." they were interrupted by someone clearing their throat on the stairs, Vilkas sighed and turned to see Laette standing there "What?" he barked, annoyed at her for spoiling this moment

"Harbringer, Farkas asked me to come and find you" she said

"Why? What does my brother want?" his tone was cold and official

"I...I don't know" she stammered noticing that they were holding hands

"Fine" he snapped and looked at Joshua, "Can we pop into Jorrvaskr on our way home? Do you mind?" he asked gently his tone losing all the sharpness of the previous moment. Joshua squeezed his fingers

"Of course" he smiled. Vilkas didn't let go of his hand even when they entered Jorrvaskr, Joshua smiled at Inigo who waved a greeting. The Khajiit had gone to see Aela and from what Joshua was seeing it was going well, Farkas didn't want anything important, so Vilkas told him he would not be home and they left for Breezehome.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they got inside Vilkas could contain his desire no longer and practically tore Joshua out of his clothes, for his part Joshua was glad he'd worn clothes that evening instead of his armour, fairly soon they were naked and in the bedroom, Joshua pushed his lover down onto the bed and fell on top of him, biting his lips and then trailing kisses up to his ear, Vilkas groaned at the attention he was receiving, his pleasure obvious. Joshua teased him until he could take it no longer, he wanted to taste him. He started to kiss down his body, lingering for a while on his sensitive nipples and receiving delicious groans and growls for his efforts, then he continued down his body kissing every part, when he reached his prize Vilkas tensed. Joshua stopped and looked at him

"Everything okay?" he asked gently

"Yes, it's just....." he trailed off

"Just what my love?" he asked and then realised "have you never had anyone do this for you before" he asked gently. 'No' he thought, he'd heard about it from Farkas but he'd never experienced it himself. Joshua seemed to sense what he was thinking

"It's okay we don't have to do anything you don't want to" he said quietly

"No I want to" Vilkas said his voice betraying his need. Joshua just smiled and returned to his task, he traced his tongue around the head for a few moments, Vilkas was making incoherent moans and groans "More Josh, please stop teasing me, I can't take it any more" 

"Mmm, I love it when you get like this" he said the lust evident in his tone, and then plunged his mouth down on him, Vilkas groaned loudly and this just made Joshua trail his hand down groaning softly as he took himself in hand, Vilkas placed his hand on his head and ran his fingers through his hair finding an ear, the Elf groaned deeply as he ran a finger along it

"Ohhh" he groaned "I can't....Ohhh" he groaned not able to hold on as Joshua seemed to suck on him even harder, a second or two later his body tensed as he stroked his own release to join Vilkas. Once cleaned up he went to get off the bed, Vilkas pulled him back, kissing him hungrily, he wanted to thank him properly for the gift he'd just received and was feeling more than a little guilty that Joshua had done all the work. He pulled away from him, Vilkas groaned in frustration

"Don't you at least want me to rinse my mouth out first" he grinned at his satisfied lover

"No" Vilkas grinned back, "I want you to get into bed right now" he said throwing back the furs so he could get in, Joshua quickly joined him "Thank you for.....that" he said as they snuggled down under the furs

"You're more than welcome" Joshua smiled and sank into blissful sleep.


	9. Deals with Daedra

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua spoils Vilkas for becoming Harbringer

When Vilkas awoke the following morning and realised he was at Breezehome a warm feeling spread across him, he laid there for a moment relishing the memory of the previous evening. He reached across the bed and instead of warm Elf his hand touched something cold and hard, confused he sat up. On Joshua's side of the bed there was a linen wrapped package, he was just trying to work out what it was when he heard footsteps on the stairs. A moment later Joshua came in with two tankards 

"Good, you're awake" he smiled 'Gods that smile makes me feel weak' Vilkas thought taking the offered Tankard, "I see you've found your present" he said plonking himself on the bottom of the bed "Well, are you going to open it?" he asked excitedly

"A present? What for it's not my birthday" he asked slightly confused, Joshua looked at him

"For being named Harbringer" he stated pushing the package toward Vilkas, his expression almost pleading. Vilkas smiled picking up the package

"You spoil me" he said with a smile, removing the linen wrappings

"I like spoiling you" he said seriously "Well? Do you like it?" he asked a hopeful tone to his voice. 'Like it' Vilkas thought as he looked at the most beautiful sword he'd ever seen

"Gods Josh, this is incredible, I love it" he pulled the very happy Elf into his arms and kissed him "are you sure though, it's very expensive" Joshua laughed

"All it cost me was a few healing and magic potions and an ear bashing from Inigo for going into the tomb alone" he smiled, Vilkas felt better until he said "besides when My Lady asks for a favour I can never refuse her"

"My Lady?" he asked with a smile and a raised eyebrow

"Meridia" he stated "a necromancer was" his voice took on a darker tone and his eyes flashed angrily "defiling her temple"

"So this is....her boon" Vilkas said the gravity of the gift hitting him 'This is a Daedric weapon' he thought to himself 'and he's giving it to me'

"Yeah, she understands though that I won't use it, I told her I'd give it to someone worthy of being her champion..."

"Her champion!" Vilkas spluttered, he'd never had any experience with the Daedra Princes

"Calm down," Joshua smiled "It just means you go around killing undead with it, so long as you do that she doesn't really care what else you do with it", Vilkas smiled, he'd never been spoiled like this before, sure the companions spoiled the twins on their birthday but this was all for him and it felt nice

"Divines, Joshua I don't know what to say, thank you seems so inadequate for such a gift, but....Thank you"

"I'm sure you'll find some way of showing your gratitude" he said with a sly smile

"You're right" he said returning the smile and pulling Joshua into his arms "In fact I think I already have" and kissed him.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Later on that evening they were sitting on the back porch of Jorrvaskr with Ria, Farkas and Athis, the Dunmer was looking at the sword jealously, 

"Must have taken some getting" he said as he stood up and swung it, "Balanced perfectly" he grinned at Joshua

"Not really, as I said just some Draugr and a crazy Necromancer, who in fairness did not seem to understand the concept of staying dead, had to kill the bugger twice"

"Twice!" Ria asked slightly in awe, although Vilkas knew she'd fought a Necromancer before and it hadn't gone so easily for her "I struggled with once" she murmured as if reading his thoughts

"Yes" Joshua said kindly "but I do have an advantage over you" and as he said it his hand was sheathed in Lightning "hard for them to cast anything when they've just been shocked to Oblivion" he waved his fingers into a fist and the Lightning was gone, Vilkas felt a wave of happiness when Joshua did that not choosing to produce the flower, that it seemed was only for special people, like him

"Must have been pretty scary talking directly to a Daedra Prince" Athis said obviously a little in awe of Joshua, Vilkas knew how he felt

"Nah, not really" he said shaking his head and reaching down for his mead "not my first time" he smiled, lost for a moment in a memory "that honour falls to Sanguine, and a crazy night in Morrowind"

"Wow!" Athis said and Ria looked at him in shock "Two Daedra Princes"

"Not exactly," Joshua said shifting uncomfortably, Vilkas's wolf grumbled it didn't like Joshua being anything but happy "few more than that," he sighed "pretty much all of them at some time or another"

"Gods!" they all said in unison

"So they tell me" Joshua grinned "anyway you've probably talked to a Daedra Prince yourself" he said "my old friend Sanguine was in the Bannered Mare a few weeks ago when I was last in town, tried to get me to go on a binge with him, I told him 'tempted, but no', I remember last time, never did find out if that poor Dunmer ever recovered" he slipped into a memory again for a second

"Why?" Athis asked "what happened to him?

"Married a Guar" he said "I was at the wedding it was very romantic from what I can remember" he grinned "the relationship didn't work out though, language barrier was just too much", at that moment Laette came out and joined them, Vilkas put a protective arm around Joshua and was pleased when he shuffled into the embrace

"Married a Guar" Athis laughed and shook his head

"Yeah, pretty much par for the course on an evening out with Sanguine, he's a sucker for a good wedding"

"So you've dealt with Molag Bal, Azura and Malacath" Ria said the awe evident in her tone "What are they like?" she asked

"Azura, every inch a lady, she is lovely. Malacath, he's a big pussy cat really, he just doesn't like people messing with things he considers his, Ogres, he's particularly possessive of those, his little brothers he calls them. Molag Bal, now he's a different story, bad to the core he is, never really had any dealings with him. Met someone who had though, so I've seen his Mace, didn't feel right you know what I mean" he looked at them

"Not really, no" Farkas said

"Sorry, I forget sometimes, anyway I didn't want to be too near to it for too long, made me sick" he explained

"But it didn't do that to its wielder?" Farkas asked

"No, Blaze is a Khajiit, so it didn't affect her" he smiled when he thought of his Khajiit friend and her Vampire lover

"I don't understand" Farkas sighed "What does being a Cat have to do with it?" he asked

"Not an Altmer" Joshua grinned "We sense magical energy, being so in tune with it ourselves" Laette snorted, Vilkas Wolf snarled protectively, Joshua just squeezed his leg and ignored her. "Really must catch up with her when I can, lets see her pull the 'Blaze is the Nerevarine' shit when it's time for her to go to the bar now" he grinned at Vilkas "I think a trip to Black Marsh is in my future when this is all over, fancy coming?" he asked "that's where she was last living, Morrowind got a little much"

"Yeah, sounds good. I've never been" he smiled widely

"The Harbringer is supposed to stay at Jorrvaskr" Laette said with a pout. Vilkas looked at her the smile gone from his face

"The Harbringer can do what he likes" he snapped. The rest of the group shifted uncomfortably

"So what is the Nerevarine like?" Farkas asked, partly to break the tension but mostly because he wanted to know

"Um," he drifted off into memories of his Khajiit friend, 'he's probably wishing she was here right now' Vilkas thought 'being someone who could understand having a grand destiny thrust on her' 

"She's pretty down to earth, you really wouldn't know. The only give away is the Moon and Star Ring that never leaves her finger, too dangerous"

"Wow, it's true then, the legend" Athis said awe evident in his voice "it kills anyone but Lord Nerevar"

"So she told me, there were spirits in the Hall where she got it, thought they were the Nerevarine but weren't"

"You expect us to believe that a Khajiit has lived for over two hundred years, phhh, rubbish" Laette sneered. Athis started to defend Joshua but he smiled at the Dunmer

"It's okay Athis, I can stand up for myself, Laette is that your name," his eyes narrowed "I find that quite disrespectful to your Dunmer brother. You preach about Shield Siblings and how you're a family yet you know nothing of one of your siblings culture, in fact your snide little statement meant to insult me, because of your petty jealousy, was actually more insulting to him and my friend who was intentionally infected with a deadly disease, so show some fucking respect"

"What's your home like?" Farkas asked, Joshua seemed distant for a moment then he spoke his eyes tearing up a little

"Beautiful, I mean don't get me wrong every province has its distinct beauty, even Morrowind," he smiled at Athis "the sun rising over the Ashlands, or rather what's left of them is a sight to see, but the Isles are made for the gods to live in, I always kind of felt that we were just guests there. On a sunny day Alinor is the most beautiful sight you will ever behold" he got lost in a quiet sadness for a moment, a single tear rolled down his cheek. Vilkas was desperately trying to think of how to change the subject without seeming like he was when Laette spoke

"So if it's so damn beautiful why did you leave?" she asked venomously, any trace of sadness was gone and the Altmer sneer was firmly in place

"I fail to see how that is any of your business" he said with a tone of superiority "but if you can, please, go ahead, enlighten me" he waited looking at her pointedly until she was the colour of Spiced Wine "No? Okay then" he looked at the others "Well it's getting late, and I'm pretty tired so I'm going to head off home, thank you for a lovely evening" he then turned his attention to Vilkas 

"Are you coming now baby, or shall I leave the door unlocked for you" he said his tone much softer than a moment before. Vilkas looked at his brother

"Do you need me for anything?" he asked, hoping he would say no and he could go with Joshua

"No, anything that comes up can wait until morning" he smiled. And with that the lovers headed off towards Breezehome.


	10. Lessons in Alchemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas acquires a useful new skill

'God's it's warm' Vilkas thought to himself as he walked back towards Whiterun and the cold Mead that was waiting at Jorrvaskr for him, Athis and Laette weren't in a much better state, it had been warm for a couple of days 'summer's here' he thought. Laette jogged to catch up and walk beside him, she tried engaging him in small talk but after her behaviour of the previous week Vilkas was uninterested and stopped for Athis to catch up to them. It was at that moment that a yell and then curse of pain drifted towards them, Vilkas's hand went instinctively to the hilt of his weapon and he started to jog towards where the yell had come from, it wasn't long before he saw two figures one laying on the ground with his arm over his eyes and the other was kneeling, leaning over him, Vilkas was unsure as to what the leaning figure was doing so he yelled and picked up his pace

"Hey! What you doing to him?” When he got closer he realised that the kneeling creature was Inigo, and he looked hurt 'that means the one on the ground is Joshua' his mind screamed at him, it seemed Athis had the same thought because he matched Vilkas's pace and they soon reached the duo.

"The bleeding has stopped my friend, give me a moment and I'll look for a branch for you to....." he stopped when a shadow loomed over him, Inigo's speed startled Vilkas and he barely got his shield up in time to block the Khajiits incoming attack, it had no real power in it though as Inigo realised before it was too late that it was a friend, Vilkas knelt next to Joshua and his lover opened his eyes and smiled at him

"We really should stop meeting like this, it's kind of unpleasant" he joked, grinning

"What have you done this time?" Vilkas asked grinning back

"Got in a little turf war with a Bear" he said indicating the corpse laid a small distance away "Plus side new fur rug for Breezehome" he smiled and his eyes sparkled in that way that made Vilkas just want to take him right there and then

"Take it the Bear got a shot in though" he said indicating Joshua's leg which was cut badly, tied up with a tourniquet "You can't heal it?" he asked, remembering their trip to Driftshade Refuge

"Not really, low on magic" he said "and I don't really want to have to say to you later that I've got a headache" he teased with a cheeky grin

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

That night, laid in bed, Joshua fully healed and desires fully sated Vilkas turned to him 

"I know that I have no right to say this, and really I am in no position to criticise, but" he said

"But what baby? Wait, I know you wish I wouldn't take so many risks right?" he said stroking the Nords face

"Yes, I'm sorry, but I worry about you, you walk into dangerous situations with that sexy swagger of yours, thinking that you're immortal and you're not. One of these days you'll..." Vilkas couldn't bring himself to say it

"I'll die" Joshua said quietly still stroking his face, trying to comfort him "Way I look at it baby, is there's no point dying when you're two hundred and never lived a day, I'd much rather live every day of a much shorter time" then a grin spread across his face "Sexy swagger?" he asked, Vilkas grinned back

"Yeah," he said "but please Josh, It would kill me to lose you" he added quietly.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When he awoke the next morning he instantly knew something was wrong, Joshua's side of the bed was empty and soaking wet and there were sounds of vomiting coming from downstairs, he rushed down to find him with his head over a bucket, he looked pale and was sweating badly, Vilkas rushed up to him but Joshua pushed him away saying 

"Go away, I'll infect you", Vilkas resisted the weak push 

"I'm a Werewolf baby, I can't get sick remember" he looked at the pale Altmer who, for the moment at least had stopped vomiting, "We need to get you cleaned up a bit,"

"Oh, yes, bath in the stream" Joshua said a smile spreading across his face and Vilkas put his hand on his head, sure enough he had a high fever, 

"Stay there" he ordered "I'm going to sort you a bath and then I'll go to Arcadia's to get you a potion, unless you've got one"

"No, don't go to Arcadia's, bloody woman hasn't got a clue, always tells me I look bloody pale" his tirade was cut short by another bout of vomiting, "I should have a cure potion in my cupboard if I haven't I've got the ingredients to make one" he said flopping back into the chair

"And you're in no state to craft one" Vilkas said as he filled the bath with cold water

"You can" he said opening his eyes "don't worry I can talk you through it". 

Vilkas's stomach was churning over with nerves as he checked Joshua's cupboard and found no potion in there, this was dangerous stuff, he didn't know anything about Alchemy, he could do something wrong and poison him, he was just about to argue that he should go to the alchemists and buy one when there was a knock at the door, 

"Do you mind" Joshua asked "I don't think I'd make it"

"Of course, stay there" he said and walked to the door, it was Athis and Laette, the former grinned when he saw Vilkas still only wearing his light trousers

"Lie in Sera?" he asked the grin left his face when the sounds of another bout of vomiting came from inside the house "Is Joshua okay?" he asked with genuine concern, he'd often said that he liked Joshua, that it was nice to talk about home with someone who'd actually seen it

"Pretty sure it's Bone Break Fever" Vilkas said "I think the Bear was infected, how's Inigo"

"Fine when we left" the Dunmer replied "Khajiits have a stronger immune system than Altmer though and Josh was pretty badly injured, anything we can do?" he offered

"No, we're fine, thanks though" he said. It was at that moment Laette spoke

"Farkas sent us to find out if you're coming 'home' today?" she asked putting slight emphasis on the home. 'I am home' he thought to himself 'when did that happen that I feel more at home here than in my quarters at Jorrvaskr' but he said looking at Athis   
"Please tell my brother that Joshua is sick, and I have to stay to care for him and if he needs anything to come down"

While he was helping Joshua have a bath Vilkas thought about what had happened earlier, he wasn't ready for this, he'd always assumed that the reason he would stop living with Farkas would be his brother had found a wife and moved into a house with her, it never occurred to him that he would be the one to leave, and this was silly, Joshua hadn't even said he wanted to live with him. He banished the thoughts from his head and helped Joshua to get dry and redressed in clean, dry clothes. He then went into the back room and sank into a chair, he looked at Vilkas and said 

"Right, Cure potion, as you're a novice and I'm low on ingredients we'll use Mudcrab Chintin and Vampire Dust. In that little box there, yeah that one" he said as Vilkas nervously indicated a box "it should have dust inside it, take out one teaspoon and put it in the dip in the table" Vilkas carefully measured out one teaspoon of the dust and placed it in the dip in the centre. Joshua kept the instructions simple and clear and soon Vilkas was waiting for the final process to complete, he smiled at his poorly lover 

"Actually not as hard as I thought" he said

"See I told you" he grinned "just like cooking with Tilma". Vilkas turned sharply 

"How do you know about that?" he demanded

"How do you think, she told me, well actually what she said was 'don't let him kid you that he can't cook, because he can, he helps me all the time when the others aren't around'" Vilkas looked ashamed 

"It never came up" he mumbled. Joshua struggled out of the chair and moved over to him

"Hey" he said "its okay, you know I like to spoil you. Besides, I enjoy cooking" he looked at the potion "that looks ready," he said, Vilkas put it in a glass and Joshua drank it.

About an hour later Joshua was feeling much better although Vilkas insisted he stayed in the blanket, the door knocked 

"Think about what you want for dinner, I'll cook" he said as he opened the door

"Really Vil, you sure about that? He's just starting to look better by all reports from this morning" grinned Farkas, he gave him a dirty look as he moved to the side to let him in, "How you feeling?" he asked Joshua

"Better than I did this morning" Joshua grinned offering him to sit "Venison Steaks" he said to Vilkas

"Sounds good" he smiled, and busied himself making the tea. Joshua and Farkas were talking about Bone Break Fever, Farkas had had it as a child and still remembered it vividly, he was only half listening to them talk his mind had wandered back to that time at home with their Father and often wondered if Farkie held onto that memory because of that. Suddenly he realised the topic had changed

"....I mean whenever you're in town he stays here and when you're not, he sits staring this direction. He pretty much lives here" Vilkas was gesturing for Farkas to stop but his brother was ignoring him,

"I believe your brother would like you to cease what you're saying" he said grinning, Vilkas moved beside Joshua, a 'How did you know that?' look on his face, Joshua pointed to a fairly polished Silver Tankard on the side 

"Reflection" he said still grinning "Short answer is we haven't talked about it, we were just sort of letting things unfold" he said. Farkas left soon after that to give them time to talk Vilkas believed, he wanted to but he didn't know how to broach the subject. He didn't have to, Joshua did it 

"I want you to live here with me" he said "No pressure but that's what I want, but I'll respect whatever you want, staying as we are is fine too" Vilkas didn't know what to say so he said nothing, instead he leaned down and kissed him hungrily

"Do you have to make dinner right now?" Joshua whispered huskily, proving that he could make any sentence erotic

"Are you sure you're well enough?" he asked

"Very sure" Joshua replied and pulled him in for another deep kiss, before leading him to their bedroom.


	11. Alduin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua faces Alduin and Vilkas faces losing Joshua

Vilkas was facing possibly the worst night of his life, because tomorrow Joshua was to go to Alduin's refuge and face him again. The last time Vilkas wasn't as worried because he had Paarthurnax at his side, this time he would be alone, and the thought made Vilkas feel sick. Joshua, his Joshua was going to face Alduin, and he might not come back, he'd tried to make light of it when Vilkas had broached the subject earlier, he'd just grinned like he always did and told him that it didn't matter because if he didn't come back he'd failed and the world would end anyway, so he wouldn't have long to be sad. He was shocked out of his thoughts by an Altmer towering over him, unfortunately not the right Altmer 

"Vilkas are you listening to me?" the Elf said, more worried than his usual haughty tone

"No sorry Ondolemar" he replied "quietly worrying, what did you say?"

"I said, have you seen Sin...I mean Joshua" he said with a sigh

"Not for a while actually" Vilkas said desperately glancing round the room

"He's not here, I've looked everywhere" Vilkas stood

"I'll check the Skyforge, you check home" he said and the two left the Mead Hall, when they regrouped a few minutes later both were concerned to report there was no sign. They stood for a moment, then Ondolemar’s face broke into a smile 

"Rivers" he said

"Huh" Vilkas said confused

"Sin loves rivers, watching the water flow past soothes him, he had a favourite place by the river back home, we used to go there when...." he went quiet

"It's ok, I know you two were intimate" Vilkas said the jealousy burning in him. Ondolemar’s cheeks turned Orange

"I wasn't going to say that" he said trying to cover his embarrassment with an indignant tone, he sighed "Joshua's Father put a lot of pressure on his children, they are....or were in Ilianna’s case" a tinge of sadness entered his voice and a tear rolled down his cheek "very gifted and he pressured them to meet his ever rising standards. When it all got too much he would go to the river, to a hidden spot only we knew about. His Father would make him deplete his magic reserves day after day to 'fulfil his potential'"

"But he gets terrible headaches when he does that" Vilkas said

"Yes, we all do, just the kind of person Joshua's Father is, but we really need to find him". Vilkas suddenly had an idea, Athis had said he heard Lute music coming from behind one of the buildings there was running water there, not a river but it was secluded

"I think I might know where he is" he said excitedly, tearing off, the Altmer closely following. They were both very relieved to find him sat staring at the water flowing through the grate, Vilkas rushed to him and put his arms round him "Gods Josh, you're freezing" he said pulling him close to warm him up

"What were you thinking coming out here, I think you've been around these Nords too much, you think the cold won't bother you" Ondolemar smiled, and turned to leave

"Mar," Joshua said still staring at the water "Is it still there?"

"Yes and still as peaceful as it ever was" he said smiling "I visited when I was last in the Isles" this made Joshua smile and Vilkas wondered if he should just leave the two of them alone, Ondolemar seemed to read his mind because he moved to sit the other side of Joshua and indicated to him to stay "what is it Sin, tell us" Joshua sighed

"It's like that night again, consumed by hatred, I'm afraid I won't be able to come back this time" he said

"Of course you will" Ondolemar said quietly "Because you just have to look at yourself to know you're not alone" he finally looked up from the water

"What do you mean?" he said obviously confused

"Because you wear tokens from the two men who love you" Ondolemar his voice almost a whisper, Joshua's hand went instinctively to the amulet that he rarely took off, only to bathe and during lovemaking, it now made sense to Vilkas why, "Yes, the amulet I gave you and the Wolf Charm on your earring Vilkas gave you" he smiled at him "You take us into battle with you old friend and we will be there to bring you back from the darkness, no matter what those damn Blades make you do" he looked at Vilkas

"Aye my love, we will" he confirmed

"That shout, it's so full of darkness and hatred" he said "when I use it I feel their hatred and it scares me". Ondolemar looked at Vilkas confused

"Dragonrend" Vilkas explained "way I understand it, makes the Dragon concerned experience mortality. In this case, Alduin". Then Joshua said something that surprised them both

"Mar, can you stay with Vilkas, please" he begged "I don't want either of you to sit around brooding and worrying alone, a worry shared". Ondolemar looked at Vilkas but he was gazing at Joshua

"Of course he'll stay" he stated firmly "Until you return, I'm sure that his duties can wait" he looked up and caught Ondolemar looking at them "can't they" he stated firmly

"Yes, of course" he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The following day the plan was put into action. From the yard they heard Joshua shout and they saw the Dragon swoop down, Joshua shouted again and it went deathly quiet, the two men didn't say a word, just sat there in a shared state of worry. Soon after the Dragon left but Joshua didn't come down. Vilkas asked Farkas to send a whelp to find out what had happened, he sent Torvar, who returned a short time later, he went straight to Farkas and they talked some, he knew by the look on his brother’s face as he approached them that it wasn't good news 

"I think you should sit down" he said beckoning to the bench behind them once they were seated he said "the Dragon we saw land and leave has taken him to Sovenguard"

"Sovenguard, you mean he's dead" Vilkas said shock setting in, the colour drained from his face and he started to shake

"Vilkas, look at me" Ondolemar demanded and when he looked up he saw tears in the Elf's eyes "he doesn't need to be dead to enter Sovenguard, from what I understand of it, it's very similar to the spheres of Oblivion, and the Champion of Cyrodiil went in and out of Mehrunes sphere all the time, even went to the Shivering Isles and returned, besides why would he need the Dragon to take him if he was dead"

"That is true" Vilkas said hope trickling back into him, then Laette appeared out of nowhere and knelt down, hands on his knees, looking up at him

"I just heard the news" she said "if there is anything I can do" he tensed as she touched him

"Please will you refrain from pawing him and give us some privacy" Ondolemar said

"He needs his shield siblings now, not some Thalmor" she spat at him, this was when Vilkas spoke, his tone was cold

"Leave him alone, I asked him to stay as a favour to me, he will be treated with respect. Do I make myself clear?"

"But Vil, you....." she began

"My name is Vilkas, the only people I permit to shorten it are my brother and the man I love, you will, in future, refer to me as Harbringer. Now I ask again, Do. I. Make. Myself. Clear?"

"Yes Harbringer" she said a lot more respectfully than she had previously

"Good! You're dismissed" she hurried away, hoping to find some comfort with one of her siblings but none really seemed keen, she'd brought this on herself after all, they'd all tried to tell her but she wouldn't listen. He looked at Ondolemar who was smiling at him with eyebrows raised

"How Altmer of you" he said the smile widening

"Josh would call it invoking my inner Ondolemar" he replied returning the smile

"Really?" Ondolemar said surprised

"Yeah, he talks about you all the time" at this point Farkas squeezed his brothers shoulder and left the two men alone to talk, they would need each other if the worst happened, once he left Vilkas continued "he loved or loves you, I'm not overly sure, you know it broke him to leave you but he thought it for the best since you'd joined the Dominion and he had planned what he had planned and he didn't want to drag you down with him". Ondolemar was quiet for a few moments lost in his own thoughts and memories eventually he spoke

"I would have given it all up for him if he'd just asked, just told me what he was planning to do" his voice wavered slightly and the tears returned. Vilkas clutched his hand and the Elf looked down at the small gesture "Love him!" he said quietly

"Until the end of time" Vilkas promised.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was three days later when they finally had some news. Vilkas was training the whelps in the yard, Ondolemar was helping him, casting low level spells at them, helping to teach them how to effectively battle a mage 

"Good, well trained Mages will use Ice spells against warriors such as yourselves as it saps your Stamina and makes swinging your weapon more difficult" Ondolemar said casting an light Ice spell at Ria who countered it with her shield "excellent" he praised. Vilkas thought about their trip to Driftshade Refuge, Joshua had used Fire and Ice throughout and now he knew why, his thoughts were interrupted by a loud cry from the watch tower

"Dragon! There's a Dragon at the gate" the two moved without words running down to the gate, somewhat to see if they could help but mostly just hoping.....” When they got to the gate they saw the guards weren't attacking and then a familiar figure appeared from behind it, he walked up to it's face and stroked his hand against it and said something they couldn't hear from where they were stood, the Dragon replied, although they couldn't hear what it said, then Joshua stepped back and it spread it's mighty wings and left

"Farewell Dovahkiin, until again we meet" it said as it flew away. 

Once it had gone Joshua turned to look at the group assembled watching the interaction then he spotted Vilkas and ran towards him virtually throwing himself into his arms, kissing him passionately, he returned the kiss when they parted to breathe they found they were alone

"Is it done?" Vilkas asked hopefully, gazing into his lovers eyes as if no one else existed because at that moment no one else did

"Yes, it's done" he said "and Kodlak gave us his blessing" he smiled, Vilkas matched his smile, took his hand in his and together they walked back into the city.


	12. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas gets a visit from Joshua's 'Family'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to anyone who noticed I had a moron moment and uploaded the same chapter twice

Vilkas was sat staring out of the window, it was a lovely sunny day and he was taking full advantage of being Harbringer, delegating training to Aela 'I don't do it often' he reasoned as his Shield Sisters annoyed tones drifted across the yard to him. Suddenly the sun was blocked out for a moment by a shadow accompanied by the sound of beating wings, Vilkas grudgingly got up to go see what all the commotion was about, as he was walking across the hall to the door he heard something that made his blood run cold

"Vilkas" a strange voice said, he picked up his pace, ‘what could a Dragon possibly want with me?' he thought to himself. He almost collided with Athis who was apparently coming in to get him

"Oh Vilkas, you have a visitor" he panted nervously, he'd obviously run in from the yard

"Aye, I heard" he said heading towards the door, Athis didn't follow just stayed in the Mead Hall staring nervously at the door.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When Vilkas came outside he saw a majestic Red Dragon perched on Jorrvaskr, it was looking at the Skyforge so he cleared his throat to gain its attention, it looked at him suspiciously 

"Vilkas?" it questioned

"Aye" Vilkas replied, deciding not to add anything further

"Stables" it said simply and took off heading towards them, Vilkas went to follow but Aela stopped him

"Are you sure that's wise?" she asked "You have no idea what it wants, you shouldn't go alone" he smiled at her

"If it wanted me dead, it would have done it by now, I think it wants to talk"

"Talk" she snorted "about what? Your recipe for Roast Goat maybe"

"I'd guess Joshua" Vilkas grinned he liked her humour, it always made him smile "it knows my name, where I can be found and he's not here." he said turning to head to the stables, he stopped and turned to her "besides my Roast Goat isn't that famous". He walked away to her shaking her head and chuckling to herself

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The Dragon had landed on a piece of flat ground and seemed to be fascinated by the farm hands working in the field although it turned when Vilkas approached, he sat on the grass near it's face 

"Well I'm here" he stated "although I still don't know why" the Dragon narrowed its eyes and with its expression said 'Really?’ it sighed when he didn't answer

"Joshua, Wolf" it stated, Vilkas felt his breath catch in his throat, Joshua had told them! He'd trusted him and his lover had betrayed him, 'who else has he told' he thought. The Dragon seemed to be growing impatient but Vilkas didn't care, he felt betrayed and angry

"What about him Dragon?" he said his anger bleeding into his voice

"Odahviing" the Dragon stated

"What?" Vilkas snapped forgetting for a moment what he was talking to

"My name is Odahviing" the Dragon said with a hint of a smile

"Oh, yes, hello Odahviing" Vilkas said his anger at his loves betrayal still burning 

"You seem angry with my kin. Why?" it asked 'My kin?' Vilkas thought, then he realised who the Dragon meant

"He told you about my condition" he said quietly, anger turning to hurt

"Joshua did not directly tell us...." it began

"Us!" Vilkas interrupted shocked 'how many know?' he wondered

"Us" Odahviing confirmed "Your Wolf scent is strong" it continued

"So he didn't betray me" he whispered, almost to himself, the Dragon's eyes narrowed again

"No, he didn't" it said a trace of anger and protectiveness to its tone "Paarthurnax was concerned to smell Wolf so strongly on him, we are worried, as family would be". Suddenly it all made sense to Vilkas, the Dragons had adopted Joshua and were protecting him, as it had said, they considered him family, he realised it had started talking again "....Greybeards are concerned too"

"So you want to know what my intentions are regarding him" he asked

"Yes" said Odahviing

"I love him, deeply, one day I hope he'll consent to marry me" it seemed strange to Vilkas that he was telling it this, he hadn't even talked about it to Farkas, it seemed satisfied with the answer

"Then I will have no reason to invite you 'for' dinner then" it said the threat evident in its tone

"No" he replied "I would never hurt him"

"Good, I shall inform Paarthurnax" it said and turned to go "he will return to you soon, he has left The Throat" it said as it spread its wings and took to the air.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Joshua arrived home the following afternoon, it seemed Odahviings visit was the talk of Whiterun because he already knew when he came into the yard, 

Vilkas was training the whelps having been begged by Laette and Ria to not make Aela do it again. He grinned in a way that made the Nord's knees go weak and came straight over to kiss him. 

"I hear you had a visitor" he said still grinning

"Aye" Vilkas grinned back and then turned to the whelps "when did I say training was over?" he barked at them and they quickly resumed running through the exercises "Odahviing" he said with a smile

"I thought as much by the description, I'm sorry my love," he apologised "they're quite protective, especially Paarthurnax". Vilkas smiled at him and took him away to the side, somewhere more private, where they couldn't be overheard. He took Joshua in his arms and kissed him deeply not caring if anyone could see, when they parted he said

"Divines I've missed you and it's okay, it's nice to know they care" Joshua smiled

"They're my family, well them and the Greybeards" he said thinking about the four men who'd made this so much easier, listening to him rant when Delphine got too much, allowing him to host a peace conference, patiently helping him master his Thu'um "I want you to meet them" he said suddenly "please say you'll come"

"Aye" Vilkas said smiling, he'd always wanted to make the pilgrimage and this seemed the perfect opportunity. Joshua's face broke into an incredible smile and Vilkas couldn't stop himself from kissing him again, "they know" he said quietly

"Know what love" Joshua asked gazing at his lover

"That I have Beast Blood" he whispered

"Oh Vil, I swear on my devotion to Meridia that I didn't tell them" he said desperately wanting him to believe that, he started to say something else but Vilkas put his finger on his lips

"Shh, it’s okay, I know. Odahviing told me apparently I have a strong smell and my scent was all over you" Joshua smiled "What?" Vilkas asked

"Pretty much the same thing Farkas said to me, apparently you came home 'stinking of Elf' is how he put it"

"He talked to you" Vilkas said, his brother hadn't said anything to him about talking to Joshua

"Yeah, pretty much the same thing, wanted to know if I was serious about you, he was worried that I was playing with you....I told him yes, amongst other things" he added with a grin, then his face took on a more serious look "I'd have been concerned if he didn't, you're all he's got"

"Aye" he said smiling at his brother who'd just come into the yard with his lunch, Farkas waved and went and sat in is usual place in the shade "do you have to leave or can you stay?" he asked

"I can stay" Joshua smiled taking Vilkas's hand and walking towards Farkas and the whelps.


	13. Showdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua returns from Delphine in a stinking mood, Vilkas has a way of fixing that

The door to Vlindrel Hall swung open and a very annoyed Altmer entered 

"Gods, I can't believe her, Bitch" he ranted, Inigo followed and closed the door behind him. Joshua went straight to Vilkas and kissed him "Hi baby" he said "Did you get your job done"

"Aye" he said smiling at his lover, "what's Delphine done now" at mention of her name Joshua's anger returned

"Get this, after all he's done, betray Alduin, help me learn the shout I needed to defeat the aforementioned Dragon, not to mention helping me the first time, not without injury I might add" he stopped ranting for a moment, his face betraying a sadness that Vilkas couldn't get him to talk about, soon though the anger returned "she wants him dead! But she's not going to kill him herself oh no, she wants her pet freak to do it for her!" It seemed this was all there was because then he said "I'm going for a bath" and stomped off towards the bathroom. Vilkas looked at Inigo, the Khajiit shrugged his shoulders

"Not much more to tell, that was pretty much all she said, he said plenty mind you", it didn't seem like he was going to elaborate so Vilkas left him with Ria and went to find Joshua.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

He was filling the bath from the Dwemer pipes, he walked up behind him and put his hands on his hips, just this simple act of touching him made Vilkas harden slightly but this was for Joshua so he quieted his Wolf and started to run a hand up his body

"Baby, not now, I'm not in the...Ohhhhh!" he groaned as Vilkas ran a finger along his ear

"Like that don't you" he said his voice husky and heavy

"God's, I love it when you do that" Joshua gasped as he ran it down the length of the slender ear, he disregarded the ear for a moment much to Joshua's annoyance, he smiled at the face that he made

"Patience, it will be worth it I promise" he whispered as he turned Joshua around and kissed him gently but eagerly tasting every part of his lovers mouth, savouring every moment and he could feel Joshua's excitement pressed against him, he ran his hand down between them and unfastened his trousers, they dropped and the Elf groaned with the pleasure of being released. Vilkas manoeuvred him so he was sitting on the edge of the bath with his legs parted, he dropped to his knees, Joshua started to protest, to say he didn't need to, but he stopped and moaned loudly when Vilkas slipped him into his mouth and down his throat

"Oh Vil, oh gods" he gasped running his fingers through Vilkas hair, he looked up at the expression of pure ecstasy on his lovers face and it made him excited, 'This is for Josh,' a voice told him sternly 'he needs this', he slipped him in and out of his mouth for a few minutes, Joshua's moans of pleasure becoming more heated, more needy,

"Vil, I'm gonna...Ohhhhh, I can't hold on" as he said this Vilkas felt his cock twitch and hot sticky fluid rushed down his throat, when he came up Joshua was smiling the biggest smile he'd ever seen "Wow," he said "That is defiantly the best I ever had. You are incredible" his breathing was still a little heavy

"It was okay then?" Vilkas asked nervously "I've never done it before" Joshua looked at him, his expression filled with love

"Baby I thought that was the best I ever had when I thought you'd had practice" he stroked Vilkas face "So you can imagine what I think now. Right your turn" Vilkas shook his head

"Later, we've got all night" he said "Bath!” Joshua smiled

"How did I get so lucky to find you" he asked

"I ask myself that same question all the time" he said giving him a kiss on the forehead and going to get some towels.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When he went into the main room Ria and Inigo were looking at him with grins on their faces, "Guess he enjoyed whatever you just did" Ria teased

"Calmed him down didn't it" Vilkas smiled and went into the bedroom for towels, when he came back through Inigo looked up at him from the cooking pot

"Has he told you what happened?" he asked

"Not yet, I'm going to try now" he answered "How'd you get here so quickly anyway?" he asked remembering his shock earlier at their unscheduled arrival

"Odahviing, Joshua called him and he came and brought us. Much quicker by Dragon" the Khajiit said smiling

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When he returned to the bathroom Joshua was lazing in the bath, seemingly just enjoying the warmth of the water allowing it to melt his anger away, when Vilkas entered he opened his eyes

"I guess I was a little loud then" he said his cheeks turning orange

"Seems that way" Vilkas grinned "Pot calling the kettle black though really, when her and my brother share a bed"

"Ammo thanks" he smiled

"No problem, so she wants you to kill Paarthurnax huh?" he asked, not even bothering to ask if he was going to do it, he knew the old dragon had become something of a Father figure for Joshua, he provided an ear when he needed it, the Greybeards too had become very important to him "Why?"

"Because he's a Dragon, because he made mistakes, but Vil, we've all made mistakes, someone once told me that 'a mistake is only terrible if you don't learn from it or try to seek redemption for it'"

"You identify with him don't you" Vilkas said

"I've done some stuff I'm not proud of to survive, the job I met Inigo on for instance, not my finest hour but it did bring us together and to be honest with you love I don't think I'd have made it through this without him"

"I have to admit I always worried a little less when he was with you" Joshua smiled at him

"So you're not cross that I said that" he said hopefully

"No, I like that crazy Cat" Vilkas grinned "Kinda grows on you, unlike a certain Blade, so what did you say?" he started washing his lover, enjoying being the spoiler for a change

"I told her no, then she said that if that was the case we could no longer have an association"

"What did you say?"

"I said what was she going to do without me, stay in the draughty old temple with a crazy old man who I rescued from a sewer filled full of Thieves, because they haven't got a backbone between them, that they were so scared of the fucking Thalmor to leave the damn place. Not that they could do anything even if they did, only a Dragonborn can make a Dragon stay dead, so without me they're like a Bow without an Arrow, bloody useless"

"What did she say?"

"Sorry, needed to stop for breath, she didn't get chance I hadn't finished I was in full Ondolemar mode by then, and something had occurred to me, I said 'actually thinking about it, if our arrangement is over and this is the sanctuary of the Dragonborn, I'll expect you to be gone by the end of the week, if I come back in a fortnight and you're still here I'll assume we understand each other about the Paarthurnax situation. And don't get any ideas about Odahviing he's protected too' and then I turned and stalked out, Inigo just followed, I told you I was in full Ondolemar it's tough to turn it off. We got to some flat ground and I called Odahviing, I know I shouldn't take advantage of my friends kind offer but I just really needed to be with you, needed you to hold me" he said looking deeply into his lovers beautiful Blue eyes "needy, I know" he said, Vilkas just smiled

"I don't have an Amulet of Mara but," he sighed "Will you make me the happiest man in Skyrim and marry me?"

"Gods" Joshua said a little shocked and then he gave Vilkas one of his incredible smiles "yes" he said and pulled him in for a very passionate kiss.


	14. No one Escapes from Cidhna Mine - The Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ondolemar has been arrested and taken to Cidhna mine, Joshua decides this isn't acceptable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The character Johnny Rains and refrences to his adventures with Blaze are from the Morrowind Mod, Underground II, it was created by Qarl and as such all content belongs to him. Sadly he is no longer with us. R.I.P Qarl, a great loss to the Elder Scrolls Community

Vilkas was worried, Joshua had almost completely withdrawn since finding out about Ondolemar and his visit to Windhelm had not really improved things very much. He didn’t seem to believe the leader of the Stormcloaks assurances that he would not be harmed. It was seeming all too familiar, the shutting people out, the disappearing alone for hours and not telling anyone where he’d been. Vilkas knew from conversations with Ondolemar that he was planning something, he awoken the previous night and found Joshua’s side empty, venturing downstairs he’d found him sitting at his desk writing

“You should wait until morning the candlelight will damage those beautiful eyes” he said walking over and kissing his lover on his head. Joshua pushed what he was writing under the spare parchment, Vilkas only got one word ‘help’. 

“My eyes will still be beautiful” he smiled at his lover warmly “they’ll just be useless. Did I wake you?”

“No, Fenrir did, he missed you” Vilkas grinned calling his wolf by Joshua’s pet name for him “who are you writing to?” he asked

“No one, just keeping my journal up to date” he said. This did nothing for the nagging worry growing in his gut, Joshua thought keeping a journal silly, ‘no one ever reads it’ he’d say ‘I can remember what I’ve done’, so that was obviously a lie, he looked at him but Joshua ignored the look

“You should get back to bed, I’ll just finish here and be right with you,” Vilkas went back up the stairs ‘this is exactly what Ondolemar said he was like last time’ a voice in his head cautioned ‘he’s going to do something, I’ve got to find out what’ he thought climbing back into bed, he didn’t sleep until Joshua joined him.

The following morning as he was leaving for Jorrvaskr he noticed a Breton walk towards Breezehome, he stopped and watched the interaction, Joshua gave the Breton a letter and some money. ‘A courier, why the secrecy about that letter?' He thought.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They were sitting in Jorrvaskr a few weeks later when a courier came in looking for Joshua, he stood and walked over

“I’m the Dragonborn, Joshua” he said taking the letter the courier offered and went to give the man some gold

“No need, I was well compensated before leaving Black Marsh” he said smiling, he obviously appreciated the gesture

“I insist,” Joshua smiled “You went out of your way to find me”. The courier took the offered gold, thanked Joshua and left. He seemed unsure as to what to do, he obviously wanted to leave and read his letter in private, but he didn’t know how to say it. Vilkas did it for him

“Well” he said, “much as I’d love to spend the day relaxing with you there are whelps to train” he said smiling, “Sorry my love, can I meet you at home later”

“Course” Joshua smiled and left the mead hall.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

A couple of weeks later, on a rainy afternoon there was a knock at the door, Inigo went to answer it and Vilkas heard him talking to someone with an accent he didn’t recognise. It seemed they wanted Joshua, who at the sound of the voice came rushing out from where he’d been making potions

“Johnny” he called “don’t stand out in the bloody rain get yourself inside”

“I would if this Khajiit would move his ass” the voice replied, when he came in Joshua went to hug him

“Wet” he cautioned

“And?” Joshua asked grinning and hugged the ‘VAMPIRE’ Fenrir screamed, Vilkas growled menacingly and the Vampire became agitated

“Now, now you two play nicely” Joshua smiled walking over to him and putting his arm around his waist “Vilkas this is my ‘very’ old friend Johnny Rains and Johnny this is my betrothed Vilkas”

“Nice to meet you” Johnny said to Vilkas “Hey not so much of the old I’m not a thousand yet” he grinned, Joshua grinned back

“So where is she?” he asked

“You have a market, where do you think she is” Johnny said his grin growing wider “You know she can’t resist a good market, she traded with the Khajiit outside too” he said shaking his head “So who’ve I got to kill to get a mead round here”

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The Khajiit in question turned up some time later and she and Inigo immediately started talking about Elsweyr, it seemed that Blaze had not been there for a while and was slightly missing home

“Why do you not go for a visit?” Inigo questioned

“Because if this one leaves Smiley for any length of time he gets into trouble and our brethren fear him” she answered

“Why?” asked Vilkas slightly confused, the Khajiit smiled

“Our people fear Litch’s” she said. It was at that moment Johnny entered and Blaze went to freshen up

He waited until she’d gone “That’s not the reason” he said quietly “they are really reverent of her and it drives her mad, they are unquestioningly proud the Nerevarine was reborn Khajiit, she just wants to put all that behind her, you know” 

“I know how she feels” Joshua mumbled, Vilkas took his hand and squeezed it slightly, he got rewarded with a smile. Johnny saw this and grinned

“By the Divines, I never thought you’d settle down, last time I saw you, you were….”

“Yeah, well enough of that” Joshua said with a ‘shut up’ look on his face, then they heard a voice from behind them

“Joshua is embarrassed yes?” it said, they turned to see a much happier Khajiit, now wearing a light dress “Perhaps my friend should be hmmm?” she grinned

“I have nothing to be ashamed of” Joshua scolded lightly “he was very willing”

“Yes, he was” said Johnny grinning ”Very!”

“Right time to change the subject, getting round to why you’re here” 

“What, you mean we’re here for something other than to drink the shit they call beer” he said

“Sanguine’s in the pub, if you want to pop down and see him” Joshua smiled

“Nah, last time I partied with him I had a hangover for a week” he said “so why are we here?”

“Honestly, because I need the very special talents of a certain smoking hot Khajiit” he gave her one of his special smiles. She rolled her eyes

“Perhaps my friend can get to the point” she said grinning at him “what does he need from this one” Joshua got up and went to get some papers he’d been working on for the last few weeks, handing them to her, she started to look through them

“I need her to pull off another miracle, you up for that babe?” he smiled his eyes sparkling with anticipation of what was to come. The Khajiit matched his smile

“Always, dear friend. What have you got in mind?” He flashed her a brilliant smile

“They tell me that nobody escapes from Cidhna Mine, we’re going to prove them wrong”. The room went deathly quiet, Johnny broke it

“Here we go again” he muttered

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Joshua had explained to the visitors that Ondolemar had been taken prisoner by the Stormcloaks while travelling and been taken to the most secure prison on Skyrim, he’d gone to see Ulfric Stormcloak to attempt to persuade him to release his friend but the most he could do was force Ulfric to assure him that Ondolemar wouldn’t be harmed, but he couldn’t release him due to him being a Thalmor. This it seems was unacceptable

“After all I did for them, they can’t do me this one fucking favour” he raged, Vilkas squeezed his hand supportively. Blaze grinned, understanding flowing onto her face

“Old Magic” she said “When do we leave?” excitement filling her. Before Joshua could answer Inigo spoke

“Please stop talking in codes my friends and tell us” he said shaking his head. Blaze did not say a word just waved her hand and Inigo started to rise off the chair

“Old magic” she grinned 

“There are many spells that the modern mages have forgotten” Johnny explained as Blaze lowered Inigo back down onto the chair, “I’m assuming you are hoping for some Divine Intervention” 

“And some Recall” Joshua grinned at Blaze “So you think it can be done, pull off an escape from the most secure prison in the land” he said

“This one has done it before” she smiled at him “So it can be done again”


	15. No one Escapes from Cidhna Mine - The Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua and Vilkas pull off the apparently impossible, with a little help from their friends
> 
> The character Johnny Raines and refrences to his adventures with Blaze are from the Morrowind Mod Underground II, it was created by Qarl and as such all content belongs to him. Sadly he is no longer with us. R.I.P Qarl, a great loss to the Elder Scrolls Community

It was very late as they walked up to the gates of Markarth, Inigo had asked Johnny how he met such an enchanting creature ‘he’s got a crush’ Vilkas thought to himself

“Pretty much waltzed into my life and never left” Johnny said grinning “took me to this psycho bitches house and seduced me, I mean man how could I say no” at this Blaze turned

“This one wishes when you tell that story you would tell it truthfully” she scolded

“Okay, maybe I took her” he grinned, the grey Khajiit turned and gave him a look to which he blew her a kiss

“Johnny took this one to the house after we’d hit a dead end in our mission” she explained, Johnny chuckled to himself remembering the events that proceeded it, “Blaze remembers it was you who said enough talk” her smile took on a sultry tone at the memory “besides if Johnny wants to talk psycho bitches perhaps he should remember Precious hmm?”

“Yeah, Bitch!” he spat “I fucking hated her, but you killed her for me baby” Blaze looked slightly uncomfortable, ‘you didn’t kill her’ Vilkas thought to himself, it didn’t surprise him from what Joshua had told him about her and what he’d observed it seemed she wouldn’t kill if she had another option, it seems in this case she’d found one, he stayed silent. He felt a hand on his arm

“You guys go on in we’ll meet you inside, I want a moment alone with Vilkas” Joshua said. Once they’d gone he turned to look at his lover

“You don’t have to do this, Inigo either although I’ve already spoken to him and he started going on about him owing me a life debt etc, you can stay in The Silver Blood, we could end up in the prison or dead you know. I can’t ask you to….” Vilkas silenced him with a finger

“You don’t have to and for the record I’m coming. If you think I’m going to let you do this alone you are sorely mistaken” Joshua smiled

“I knew I wouldn’t have to. I love you” he said hugging Vilkas. Fenrir growled happily

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

“Right,” Joshua said as he joined the group, does everyone know what they are doing. Everyone said they did and they split, Inigo going to cause a diversion to allow them to enter the mine, the rest of the group going to where they were going to enter, there was a back door Cynric had told them and this was were they were going in.

Once they were inside they were to make their way to where Ondolemar was being held, due to him being an important prisoner they weren’t keeping him with the others, Joshua had become angry, vowing vengeance on Ulfric. Vilkas hoped it was just the anger talking and that he would not start a war with them. That was something they would need to talk about once Ondolemar was safe. He looked up when Johnny spoke

“You do realise they will notice he’s gone” he said

“I’m banking on them not being able to admit that someone escaped, they can hardly say ‘no one escapes from Cidhna Mine, except that one time’ can they” he grinned, although it didn’t last long “Ondolemar will be safe and left alone, that I promise you. Otherwise Eastmarch will need a new Jarl and the Thalmor already know not to mess with me” he said menacingly

Voices and noise reached them, it seemed that Inigo had started his diversion and they entered the door.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they reached the area where Ondolemar was being held they found two guards watching him, Johnny smiled

“My time to shine” he said and threw a pebble to gain the guards attention, they both looked and one turned to the other

“You’re turn to check it out” he said

“Aye, I suppose it is” the other one stated heading toward the sound “probably just another bloody Skeever” he muttered. Instead of a Skeever he found Johnny smiling at him

“Sleep” Johnny said touching his forehead with the palm of his hand the guards head dropped although he remained standing “useful trick when your dinner is a bit lively” he explained. He then snuck out and put the other one in a trance also, Blaze looked at him lovingly and Vilkas marvelled at how much she loved him considering the time spent together, he must have mumbled something because Joshua whispered

“She risked everything for him” and smiled squeezing his hand. Then it was Joshua’s turn, he picked the cell door in moments and rushed inside

“Gods” gasped Vilkas, he almost didn’t recognise his friend, he was filthy, had a beard and it seemed that Ulfric’s orders were only partially followed as his eye was swollen shut and he had bruises covering him. He looked down at Joshua kneeling in front of him

“Sin?” he asked “are you real?”

“Yes Mar” Joshua replied soothingly “I’m real, are you okay? Who beat you so badly?” Vilkas knew Joshua well enough to know that he was furious but he didn’t let it show

“The guards, I did wrong, they were correct to punish me” he said, so completely different from his usual haughty demur

“What in Meridia’s name did you do to deserve such a savage beating and why haven’t you healed it?” Joshua asked putting his hand on his friends

“I wasted my food on the floor” he replied looking at a tiny stain on the filthy floor “I can’t Sin, they put magic poison in my food and drink” he started to cry Joshua moved to sit next to him and held him for a moment

“I’m sorry Mar, but we’ve got to go are you strong enough to stand” he asked gently

“Of course” Ondolemar mumbled not meeting their eyes. He tried to stand and collapsed forward, Vilkas caught him. Joshua sighed angrily

“Vilkas you’re going to have to help him, have you got the Amulet Blaze gave you” this jolted him out of his shock at how thin Ondolemar was, they’d obviously been feeding him, he’d got that much from what the Altmer had said but it really wasn’t enough

“Yes” he whispered

“Good, you know what to do” Joshua smiled at him “We’ll see you at home”

Vilkas touched the Amulet muttering a command word and the world around him started to melt and grow cloudy. When it cleared Vilkas found himself in the space they’d cleared and Blaze had marked earlier. He got Ondolemar to a chair. The Elf looked at Vilkas and smiled

“He asked you to help save me” he whispered hoarsely “thank you” he started to cry again, it broke Vilkas heart, he’d been there for him when Joshua had gone off to fight Alduin, supporting him, his reassurances the only thing that got him through the dark times. It was horrible to see him so badly treated, by people who consider themselves honourable, Fenrir growled angrily but Vilkas quieted him.

“No, he didn’t need to” Vilkas smiled kindly “I’ll go and get you a blanket and a potion or two. You need to warm up and heal a little” he said, Ondolemar nodded numbly. Vilkas went into the potion cupboard and found what he was looking for, he hoped Joshua wouldn’t mind him giving away his magic regeneration potions but he figured Ondolemar needed them more at the moment, he also grabbed a blanket, the Elf was freezing. He took them back to him, he was staring at the fire as if he’d never seen one before and it made Vilkas’s heart hurt. He handed Ondolemar the potions and he drank them gratefully, as he did Vilkas wrapped him in the blanket and held him to warm him up

“Thank you Vilkas” Ondolemar muttered, tears flowing again “Sindill is very lucky”. Vilkas didn’t get to answer because he heard movement behind him. The others had returned


	16. Fenrir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua and Vilkas talk about the purity ritual and Vilkas makes a final decision

The gloom of Breezehome felt good to Vilkas’s eyes after the intense brightness of midday in Whiterun, when his eyes adjusted he saw Joshua sitting staring at him, an unreadable expression on his face

“Hi love” Vilkas smiled

“We need to talk” Joshua said by way of greeting

“Where’s Ondolemar?” he asked desperately wondering what had happened, ever since he’d come back from Markarth he seemed to have something on his mind, Vilkas had been, up until now, managing to avoid talking about it but it seemed his luck had run out

“He’s at Jorrvaskr training the whelps” Joshua replied “don’t try to change the subject, we need to talk” he said sternly. It had, Vilkas sighed and sat in the chair next to him

“What about?” he said, his voice defeated

“Us” Joshua said “our impending wedding”

“What about it?” he asked trying to sound casual, he went to take Joshua’s hand and was relieved when he allowed it, he sighed

“Ondolemar, Johnny and Blaze are probably the people who know me best and they are concerned that I am marrying a man who hates himself”

“I don’t hate myself” Vilkas protested

“Not all of you no, but some, one part to be exact, Fenrir” he said “You never let him out, you repress him and yet you won’t go and use the cure, so at least part of you wants him to remain”

“I don’t know, I think about doing it, using the cure….”

“Then what stops you?” Joshua asked kindly

“I don’t know” Vilkas said frustrated at himself

“Before you commit to me you need to be comfortable with who you are. I’m Dragonborn, I’m comfortable with that and even if I could change it I wouldn’t, it’s part of what makes me, me, but you’re not, you need to take some time and have a serious think about what you want Vilkas, I won’t marry you until you’ve made a final decision one way or the other”

“Do you want me to move out?” Vilkas asked

“Gods no, unless you think having me around will distract you” he grinned seductively. Vilkas pulled him out of his chair and onto his lap, Joshua didn’t resist and wriggled a little as he sat down drawing a delicious groan from his lover, “Ondolemar won’t be back for some time” he whispered

“I want you” he groaned as Joshua bit down on his neck

“Which one of you?” he whispered

“Both” Vilkas said and stood up leading Joshua to the bedroom

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they reached the bedroom they started tearing at each others clothes and soon they were naked, Vilkas just gazed lustily at his gorgeous lover shivering with desire for him, he went to join him on the bed but Joshua stopped him

“What is it?” he asked a little confused by the mixed signals he was receiving, Joshua’s cheeks turned orange and he moved so Vilkas could join him, seemingly changing his mind. Vilkas stayed where he was and smiled “What did you want?” he asked his voice thick with desire, it seemed Joshua wanted to do something different and was embarrassed, not something the Elf usually suffered from

“I…I want you to take me” he said quickly his blush deepening. Vilkas was confused, he didn’t know why Joshua was embarrassed about that. His lover seemed to sense his confusion because he timidly moved onto all fours in the middle of the bed and looked at Vilkas, Fenrir growled with desire at this submissive gesture and Vilkas smiled lustily

“Oh” he said understanding and moved behind his lover, Joshua groaned with anticipation as Vilkas oiled himself and put his hands on his hips, he ran his hand over him until he reached the small opening sliding a finger in he found him to be very receptive and soon he could easily slide two fingers in and out, by now Joshua was begging to be taken, his desperation was driving Vilkas crazy, “Gods I love you” he gasped as he entered him, Joshua groaned incoherently as Vilkas started to rock slowly

“Please baby, touch me, I need you” he managed and then was lost again as Vilkas took him in his hand, Vilkas rubbed him roughly he was swept away in the passion and Joshua seemed to enjoy it as after a few strokes he felt the warm wetness spread over his hand, as his lover tightened around him he joined him pumping deep inside the Elf with an possessive growl.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They were clean and cuddled together in bed when Vilkas spoke “That was different” he said smiling “Good though”

“I’ve never done it like that before, you’re the only one I’ve trusted enough to allow it” Joshua admitted

“I lied to you earlier” he said ashamed of the fact, especially after that

“How?” Joshua raised himself onto his elbow to look at his lover, he knew lying was a big deal to Vilkas so he must have had a good reason. Vilkas sighed deeply

“Before I met you I struggled with my wolf side, I thought it a curse. Then I met you, Fenrir loves you, he’s passive when you’re with me or when I think about you. I chose the gift offered, I have no great desire to go to Sovenguard as Kodlak did, Hircine’s hunting grounds are as good a place as any to spend the afterlife” he stopped and wouldn’t look Joshua in the eye

“So why keep the head if your decision is to keep Fenrir, he is part of you after all” Joshua asked gently, turning his lovers head, forcing him to look him in the eye “I won’t judge you baby, I love you”

“I’m afraid that if you see me that way, you’ll view me as a monster and I’ll lose you, then if that happens I can cleanse myself” he said quietly

“But baby, I’ve seen you in Fenrir form, remember?” Joshua said smiling

“Yes, in the heat of battle, you don’t see details then Joshua” he said sudden anger flaring, his eyes flashed, why couldn’t he understand

“Change for me then, show me, but I promise you that my feelings for you or Fenrir will not change” Joshua said seriously. Vilkas thought about this for a moment and then he sighed and got off the bed

“Are you sure you want to see this?” he asked concern and fear evident in his voice

“Yes” Joshua said “show me”. Vilkas concentrated and the wolf burst forth from his body, he looked at Joshua for signs of disgust and horror, but he found only an expression of unconditional love. He scooted across the bed and walked over to Vilkas and put his hand up to his face

“I could never not love you, I know it’s you in there, I can see it in your eyes when you look at me that same soppy look. Who knew the grumpy, stern Vilkas is a soppy romantic. Oh don’t look at me like that I haven’t told anyone about the breakfasts in bed or the little gifts you leave like the Bonemeal you left for me on my alchemy table” he stroked Vilkas’s muzzle “If you want to keep Fenrir, keep him.” he said “you won’t lose me”

It wasn’t long before Vilkas was a man once more and they were cuddling in bed. They must have fallen asleep because it seemed like no time had passed before they heard Ondolemar and Inigo downstairs. Joshua went to get up and join them but Vilkas stopped him

“I’m keeping Fenrir” he stated with a smile “Marry me now”

“Just as soon as you get rid of that head” Joshua smiled and kissed him


	17. Dragons and Weddings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua and Vilkas finally tie the knot

Vilkas was the happiest he’d ever felt, it was the night before his wedding, his betrothed was right beside him, he was surrounded by friends and family and perhaps most importantly he’d accepted his wolf, controlling it was much easier now he was at ease with it. He was jolted out of his thoughts by his brother’s voice talking to Blaze

“Seriously though, you sound like you can handle yourself in a brawl” he said “but I’m Jorrvaskr’s brawling champion, no one’s ever beaten me, even my brother” he looked at Vilkas who nodded, Joshua smiled at him 

“You let him win didn’t you” he asked quietly

“No, I am ashamed to admit that he beat me” he grinned “but he’s about to get his butt handed to him isn’t he”

“If he fights her yes” Joshua said, at that point Johnny and Aela joined them

“Is he seriously thinking of taking her on?” Johnny asked “Does he know she’s the brawling champion of the Orc Strongholds?” They’d stayed in Skyrim after Ondolemar’s liberation, simply sending word for Smiley to join them

“It would appear so” Joshua said indicating the tiny Khajiit squaring up in front of Farkas. It wasn’t long before Blaze was walking back to the group having beaten him

“Not much of a challenge, Joshua?” she asked with a grin

“Maybe later Kitten” he said with a smile “when I’ve had a few more beers”, 

“This one is going for more mead” she grinned and walked into the hall

Vilkas looked at him in shock, Johnny smiled “what are you shocked about? The fact that Joshua is quite handy with his fists or the fact that he just called her Kitten” he asked

“Both” said Vilkas, his face breaking into a gin

“Okay, I’ll start with the Kitten, when we first met him in Cyrodiil and she told him she was the Nerevarine he said she couldn’t be ‘cause she was just a Kitten, he was pretty drunk mind you and it stuck” he paused to take a drink of his mead “you know this stuff kinda grows on you, most mages are adept with small weapons although Joshua here doesn’t like weapons, so he uses his fists, hits quite hard too. Why are you looking like that?” he asked as Vilkas gained a new respect for Ondolemar having seen him take a punch from Joshua, he told Johnny of the incident. It seemed that this would be the perfect opportunity to satisfy his curiosity

“How did you and Blaze meet?” he asked, Johnny smiled

“You mean how did the holy Nerevarine end up with a Vampire” he said smiling, “don’t worry you’re not the first to ask. She came looking for a mythical ring, the Ring of Awareness, put it on and instantly you can tell everything about a person, their strengths, weaknesses, makes battle a whole lot easier if you know your opponent favours melee weapons, anyway she asked Ueki, this crazy half naked Orc who lived in the sewers beneath Balmora and he told her that she should seek me out because I might know something, she did” he explained

“So where does the psycho woman come in?” he asked confused

“Amanda, yeah that came later, she had information on the Master Vampire” he seemed to drift off, Vilkas cleared his throat and he snapped out of it “Sorry turns out it was my father, that was a bit of a shock to be honest, Blaze looked at me like she could kill me, like I’d kept it from her. It wasn’t like we kept in constant touch, I had no idea he’d started this, but he didn’t know anything so turned out to be a dead end anyway, course we were already sleeping together by then”

“Wow, Joshua said she risked everything for you” Johnny let out a small laugh

“Did he now?” he said with a sly smile “yes she did, but it had nothing to do with the ring…” he drifted off seemingly unsure whether he wanted to talk about it, then he sighed “I died” he said simply

“Gods” said Vilkas unsure of what else to say at such a statement “but how?” Johnny smiled

“Blaze, amped up on Moon Sugar, she went on a bit of a bender when it happened, she was with me, found out that Molag Bal’s daughter was being naughty with a Ice Atronach in a cave somewhere in Morrowind, pretty much making Molag a laughing stock amongst the Princes, so my baby decided to cut a deal, she marched into Molag’s temple, without an offering, stood next to his statue and bellowed for him to come and talk to her, she had a deal for him”

“Did he come?” Vilkas said

“Yeah, seems she’d peaked his curiosity, basically she said to him that she knew about his daughter and she could deal with the problem for a price, he’s a Daedra prince so he tried to get a better deal, apparently she just turned and walked away telling him ‘it’s fine, this one will just ask another, perhaps Azura will help’. Course this went down well, you must know how petty and competitive they are you’ve dealt with them yourself” he said indicating Dawnbreaker on Vilkas hip “He made the deal with her, my life for his daughters, she went to the cave and destroyed them all, Molag honoured his end of the bargain, I’ve never left her side since”. Vilkas was speechless, hearing Johnny talk of master Vampires and dealing with Daedra princes shocked him a little, 

“Joshua gave me Dawnbreaker as a gift for becoming Harbringer” he said dumbly, feeling very inadequate. It was at this moment that Farkas and Blaze joined them with Athis and Ria in tow

“Yes I did, but I wouldn’t worry about Johnny looking down on you because of it” he said. ‘How does he always know what I’m thinking?’, Vilkas thought and squeezed Joshua’s hand gratefully “because I know that the sword that has almost every Companion drooling was a gift from Blaze” Johnny grinned and pulled Chaos from it’s sheath and handed it to Ria who took it like it was made of fragile glass and tried to pass it to Athis who refused so quickly handed it to Vilkas

“Beautiful Sword” he said, he could tell the edge was razor sharp and it was engraved along the paper thin blade with runes although it didn’t glow like it was enchanted, 

“A very strange realm, bit sweet for my taste but we did get the sword there amongst other rewards” he looked at Blaze with a sexy smile on his face which she returned

“Yes, well, enough of that hmm?” she said

“Oh, now I think it is ‘my’ friend who is embarrassed” Joshua said to her chuckling

“We were just talking about old time’s baby” he said

“Such as?” she asked

“You finding out my Father was the Master Vampire that we’d been hunting, I thought you were going to kill me and the events of your Moon Sugar bender”

“Not a bender” she scolded

“Well what do you call being out of your head on Moon Sugar for five weeks straight hmm?” Joshua asked “Because I’d call it a Bender babe” the assembled companions nodded, she sighed 

“Since Blaze had met Johnny she’d swam through a freezing pool to retrieve a sword, fought Ordinators to save a yearling, been made very tiny, been called an Assface by an Ascended Sleeper who’s strange and disturbing home they had broken into…” Johnny stopped her then by laughing

“Yeah, but you did tell him he looked like an Elephant with Leprosy” he dissolved in giggles at the memory so she continued

“Found out this ones lover’s father was the Master Vampire who loved tropical fish, although” she looked pointedly at Johnny who grinned at her “it is merely a hobby, add all that to the Nerevarine business, Blaze really needed a break”

“Wow, I’d say” Athis said in awe

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The following morning Fenrir woke Vilkas early, he left Joshua to sleep and made his way to Jorrvaskr, preparations for the wedding were in full swing, he was surprised to see Johnny helping Ondolemar to hang decorations, he wandered over to them

“Hello” he smiled

“Hello yourself, nervous yet?” Johnny asked “I had to have three Brandies when me and Blaze did it just to calm my nerves, I was a wreck, she was calm as always”

“Not yet, still in the ‘wow, I’m getting married today’ phase of proceedings, where is she anyway?” Vilkas answered passing Ondolemar a Snowberry garland

“Probably the same place as Joshua, my baby is not a morning Kitty” he grinned

“Yes, Joshua was never really a morning person, more a mid afternoon, stay up half the night person” Ondolemar smiled

“Still is, doesn’t bother me though, I don’t sleep much. It’s how we first met” Vilkas said helping with the decorations, Ondolemar laughed

“Yes, it would seem you were doing quite well until you called him a Thalmor” he said, Johnny’s eyes widened

“You didn’t” he said

“Unfortunately I did, I’m rubbish at dealing with people, I always say the wrong thing” Vilkas admitted

“And he’s still marrying you?” Johnny asked shock evident

"He is, we’ve been through a lot together and somehow it’s just made us stronger”. Farkas came out into the yard and made his way over

“No!” he said “It’s your wedding day, you’re not helping” Vilkas smiled at his brother

“Okay, actually I was here chatting, not really helping at all was I?” he asked the two men who agreed

“Liars the lot of you, I watched you from the window” he grinned. The grin dropped from their faces as they smelled blood and turned to see a very hung over Blaze come out, and sit quietly in the shade, Farkas looked at Johnny accusingly

“She sometimes gets a little rough if you know what I mean” he explained “and she was drunk last night so…” he left the rest unsaid, but Vilkas thought he would ask her later, she was important to Joshua so therefore important to him, the same went for Ondolemar, but when he thought about it the Altmer had at some point become important in his own right. 

Jorrvaskr looked amazing when they’d finished and Vilkas just kept telling everyone thank you for everything, he was so happy and wanted to share it.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The time was almost upon them and everything was ready, Vilkas sat in the mead hall and suddenly the nerves hit him. ‘What if Joshua changes his mind?’ What if he doesn’t turn up?’ Johnny looked across at him and brought a bottle of mead

“Nerves have hit haven’t they, here” he said handing him the mead, “told you they would”. Vilkas didn’t get a chance to answer as the beating of wings could be heard outside, they all rushed out to see Odahviing land up near the Skyforge

“Vilkas” the Dragon smiled as it saw him

“Odahviing, I’m honoured you would attend” the Dragon bowed its head

“Paarthurnax attends as well, he was forced to land outside to allow his passenger to dismount, he will be here shortly”

“I’m glad, Joshua will be pleased” Vilkas said smiling the Dragon nodded its head again, the sound of beating wings came again and the old Dragon landed on Jorrvaskr, Odahviing looked at him

“Vilkas” he said and indicated which one he was

“Honoured” Paarthurnax said “Joshua?”

“Probably on his way” Vilkas smiled ‘I hope’ he thought, but his worries were dismissed when he heard Joshua talking to someone

“...left High Hrothgar, we’re really honoured Master” he heard him say

“Paarthurnax thought that as we considered you family at least some of us should attend” Vilkas didn’t recognise the voice, but it sounded as if Joshua was familiar with this person

“Vil, come and meet Master Arngeir” he heard Joshua call, Ondolemar joined him and they walked down

“Vilkas, this is Master Arngeir of the Greybeards, Master this is my betrothed Vilkas” the two men shook hands “and this is my oldest friend Ondolemar” the Greybeard shook his hand

“Pleasure to meet you both” he smiled

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The wedding was beautiful, Erandur had led a lovely service, Joshua was sitting out talking with the Dragons, Paarthurnax was telling Odahviing about their first fight with Alduin, Arngeir came out and chastised the Dragons for telling war stories at a wedding, they both looked suitably guilty although Joshua thought ‘looked’ was the operative word.

“I didn’t recognise you without your robes until you spoke” Joshua said “I know terrible”, Vilkas came out and joined them, putting his arm around Joshua. Arngeir laughed

“I know, it feels quite strange not to be wearing them” he looked at the couple “the others made me promise to persuade you to visit us, they too would like to meet Vilkas” he said, Joshua looked at Vilkas and he nodded

“We were thinking Master, that we might make the pilgrimage to celebrate our union, Vilkas really wants to meet you all”

“Excellent, I shall inform the others when I return” he said pleased

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The character Johnny Raines and refrences to his adventures with Blaze are from the Morrowind Mod Underground II, it was created by Qarl and as such all content belongs to him. Sadly he is no longer with us. R.I.P Qarl, a great loss to the Elder Scrolls Community. Although I have changed the way you bring Johnny back from the dead, I don't want to spoil it all :-)


	18. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The lovers discuss Joshua's change of heart which led them here

Joshua laid in bed, Vilkas sleeping peacefully by his side, he shifted slightly up onto one elbow and looked at his husbands gorgeous face, he loved to watch him sleep, his mind wandered back to the events which led to this, their meeting at the Skyforge, their kiss in Markarth, ‘gods what a kiss’

“It’s creepy when you do that” he muttered with a smile indicating that he too was awake, 

“Sorry baby, I thought you were asleep” Joshua said grinning, he received a grin in return

“You know what Fenrir’s like with you, you moved” he said opening his eyes and gently kissing him “what’s keeping you up?”

“Nothing, probably just still riding the emotional high of marrying you” he said

“See, I’d agree, but you slept just fine last night” he smiled at him “what’s on your mind?”

“I just can’t believe how lucky I am, every time I look at you I’m reminded that if it wasn’t for your persistence and Inigo I wouldn’t be here” he said

“I wouldn’t say that, you changed your mind remember” he said his face showing confusion

“Yeah, Inigo might have had something to do with that” he admitted

“Tell!” Vilkas ordered

“Oh you know I love it when you go all Alpha on me, ok, well we’d joined the Dawnguard and as I told you they wanted me to wear the armour and I’d just had that pointless conversation so I wasn’t in the best of moods,”

“Yeah, I meant to ask you, how in Oblivion did you get yourself mixed up with them” Vilkas interrupted

“Oh how do I get myself mixed up with anyone, I was drunk and this Orc Durak, approached me, sat down and asked if I was interested in joining the Dawnguard, a group of Vampire Hunters as they had too few mages within the ranks. Inigo and I discussed it and decided what the hey, it wasn’t as if we didn’t kill Vampires anyway, so we went off to Dayspring Canyon”

“Is that where they’re located?” Vilkas asked

“Yeah” Joshua nodded “got quite a sweet setup actually, they do get a little confused that my armour never needs repair and always looks new” he grinned “I put it on outside, I’ve got it stashed” Vilkas shook his head

“You are terrible, what are you going to do when they want to go on a mission with you?” he asked, Joshua’s grin widened

“I hadn’t actually thought of that, oh well”

“You weren’t in the best of moods…” Vilkas prompted

“Sorry, yeah, not in the best of moods, so I wandered over to the dining area and started to drown my sorrows, I was sat chatting to Inigo and Jadisth Buckingoud, a Breton member came wandering over and would you believe tried to chat me up, I’m sitting there fuming about being forced into a uniform and he thinks that’s a good time”

“So what did he say?” Vilkas asked, Joshua let out a short laugh

“He said ‘At least you still manage to look incredibly hot in it’, believe it or not. I just told him that I really wasn’t interested in hooking up and he went away, Inigo looked at me strangely so I asked him ‘what was that look for?’ and he said that Jadisth was exactly my type and cute so what was the problem, was I pining for a certain Companion, I tried to deny it but it just made Inigo more determined that I was” Joshua gave him an embarrassed smile “that was when he gave me an Inigo talking to” he said

“What did he say?” Vilkas asked

“He said I might as well be your lover in a physical sense, as I was already your lover in my heart, which is the most important, he also said that you seemed like you were interested as you couldn’t take your eyes off me when we were together and you were really jealous when you heard about me and Ondolemar”

“A little bit” Vilkas admitted, Joshua cuddled him a little tighter

“I thought about what he said, it was true I couldn’t get you or that kiss off my mind, sorry babe I don’t remember the one we had here, that whole night is a little fuzzy, I remember you coming round and I asked you to leave but the rest….and I came to a decision, I went and picked up Bran, they’d told me I could take a Husky earlier when I’d been issued my uniform and came home to Whiterun, I even went to the mead hall before coming home, Aela told me she hadn’t seen you for a while, so I thought I’d pop back later and see you, after dinner and you were waiting for me”

“It went an awful lot easier than I expected” he said grinning “I would like to see you in your armour though”. Joshua sighed then brightened and jumped out of bed “Where are you going?” Vilkas asked as he trotted out the door, he came back a few minutes later with a piece of rolled up parchment

“I’m sorry, I was supposed to give you this earlier, Inigo drew it for you, me in my Dawnguard armour, he thought you might want to see it” he grinned. Vilkas unrolled the picture, it was Joshua and Bran stood with a river behind them

“Did you pose for this?” he asked slightly awed by the Khajiits talent, not being able to draw a straight line

“No, we camped there one night, Inigo just chose it as a backdrop for the picture, good isn’t it” he said grinning “you can keep that he drew it for you. Seems to think, for some reason, you had something to do with Aela’s change of heart”

“Has Aela had a change of heart?” Vilkas asked innocently, although unconvincingly

“You know she has and I’m pretty sure my big hearted husband had something to do with it” he said kissing him gently

“I may have said something” he said “but if you ever tell that bloody Cat…”

“I know, you’ll be forced to kill him to keep your reputation as a grumpy cynic intact” Joshua grinned wickedly “we can’t have that can we, I’ll keep my silence”


	19. Hircine's Boon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really messed with the plot line to this quest, mainly dealing with the rewards recieved

The door to Jorrvaskr swung open and Joshua entered looking around excitedly for Vilkas, not finding him he rushed over to Farkas

“Vilkas?” he asked his eyes sparkling strangely

“Skyforge, what’s got you so worked up?” he asked

“Tell you later, got a werewolf to save” he smiled and tore off with Inigo and Ondolemar in tow, the latter stopped and shook his head, turning back round and sitting opposite Farkas

“Werewolf to save?” Farkas asked. Ondolemar smiled

“We’ve been on a bit of a hunt. Started in Falkreath, terribly sad, a couple had their child ripped apart by an ‘animal’ if you know what I mean” Farkas knew that Ondolemar knew about himself and Vilkas as his brother had confided in the Elf “it seemed they’d caught him and locked him up, Joshua went to talk to him and he explained that Hircine was punishing him and if we wanted to help we had to kill a large white stag. To be honest I found killing such a majestic animal distasteful but my Khajiit travelling companion seemed to have no such qualms. Once it was dead a ghostly vision of it came out of the forest and we heard Hircine’s voice, he said one word ‘Vilkas’. Joshua and Inigo got terribly excited and we tore back here” he didn’t get to say anything else as Joshua and Vilkas came in and made their way over to them

“Are you okay to watch over things for a few days?” Vilkas asked his brother

“Aye, seems like you’ve had a special request” Farkas grinned and his brother returned it

“Would seem so”

“Be careful” he said “I don’t want the Harbringer’s job permanently”

“I’ll be alright, I’ve got Joshua with me and he won’t let anything happen to me” he said, but he was pleased with his brothers concern. Farkas looked pointedly at Ondolemar

“Keep them safe” he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

It was late when they reached the location of Hircine’s apparition so they camped. Vilkas was sitting idly sharpening his sword as Joshua and Inigo prepared food, they were quite efficient at it, Ondolemar came over and sat next to Vilkas

“They won’t let me help, they say I’ll get in the way, seems they have some sort of system” he smiled, Vilkas grinned at him

“So they tell me” and then he felt an urge to share his worries “I suppose this is old hat to you, got to admit I’m a little nervous”

“Old hat?” Ondolemar questioned

“Sorry, Nord term, means that you’ve done this a few times, nothing new” Vilkas explained “Father used to use it all the time”

“You miss him don’t you” the Elf said “I don’t understand that, my father like Sindill’s was a little bit distant” his voice faded slightly and he looked lost for a moment, then he seemed to regain his composure, “but in answer to your statement, no it’s my first time too, not ‘old hat’ at all” they heard a giggle coming from behind them

“Old hat” Joshua’s voice said “gods Vilkas you’re corrupting him, he would never have used terms like that before and Ondolemar, your father loves you, he just didn’t know how to express it” then he handed them both a plate, and Vilkas caught a slight orange tint to Ondolemar’s cheeks but he didn’t mention it.

The following morning they made their way up to the spot, Joshua going with him as he was nervous, the stag came from the tree’s and walked up to Vilkas

“You are mine” it stated “the fact that you carry ‘her’ boon means nothing, you will go to Bloated Man’s Grotto and bring Sinding back to the fold, if you fail and he refuses. Kill Him!” and then it turned and walked away. Once it was out of sight Ondolemar broke the silence

“Direct aren’t they” he said and Inigo nodded

“Yes, they can be” he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The group were nervous as they reached the grotto, Joshua turned to Vilkas

“You may need to transform, are you comfortable with that?” he asked

“Yes, why wouldn’t I be, Inigo has seen it before and Ondolemar feels like family” he said, Joshua’s face broke into the most incredible smile at this news

“Be prepared then, Inigo is amazing at field repairs but he does need some spare parts” he grinned and the Khajiit nodded his agreement

They entered the grotto and it seemed Sinding was not alone, this didn’t surprise Joshua as the Daedric Princes were not known for playing fair. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Vilkas drop his pack and strip his armour and transform, Ondolemar gasped and he spun to snarl at him, Joshua forced him to look at him

“It’s okay, it’s a little disconcerting when you see someone you care about shift in front of you for the first time, no judgement baby.” He stroked his face “Let’s go kill some hunters huh” he said a grin on his face, Vilkas growled and set off.

Sinding snarled aggressively, the hunters had him pinned in, then an ice bolt appeared from nowhere and it gave him chance to thin their numbers slightly, moments later a fellow wolf was by his side ripping the hunters apart, once this was done, the two faced off, neither quite sure if the other was friend or foe, he was vaguely aware of voices

“….be foolish, they are werewolves Sin”

“Yes and one of them is my husband, if you think I’m letting that psychopath hurt him you’ve got another thought coming” 

Sinding felt the adrenaline leaving him and the change back to man coming over him, it seemed the other werewolf, was feeling the same. A Khajiit came over to the other man, Nord by the looks of it, and gave him his armour, then an Altmer came over and they seemed very close, probably the one that called him a psychopath, he was jogged by a voice talking to him

“Did you hear me, are you alright? Are you injured from the fight?” he turned to see another Altmer looking at him concerned, he looked down at himself and moved slightly pain shooting through his back, the Altmer noticed and went behind him, he tried to turn but found it too painful. He felt warmth and the pain subsided to nothing

“Thank you” he said as the Altmer returned to the front, but he smiled and waved his hand dismissively

“Think nothing of it, are you hurt anywhere else?” he asked, Sinding found he wasn’t and the thought that the Elf wouldn’t touch him again saddened him. The Altmer passed him some trousers, Sinding thanked him, the other werewolf and his mate came over with the Cat

“Thank you so much” he said to them all, knowing he would have been in the hunting grounds by now if it hadn’t been for them

“Don’t worry about it, I’m Joshua, this is my husband Vilkas” he said indicating to the other werewolf, “this is Inigo” he pointed to the Khajiit “and the man tending to your every need is Ondolemar” he grinned at the other Elf, and received a scowl in return “oh don’t look like that, I’m only teasing you”

Ondolemar didn’t reply as the spirit of the White Stag came into the clearing, Vilkas went over a little apprehensive, he had no need to be

“You have done well, Sinding is now back on the path, wear this proudly. We will meet again my little wolf, but not for some time yet”. There was a blinding flash of light and the stag disappeared, when their vision cleared there was a set of fur armour laid on the grass where it had stood, Vilkas picked it up and looked at Joshua. He grinned at him

“Try it on” he said. Vilkas nodded and proceeded to change, stopping when he came to his trousers, Joshua laughed “it’s not the first time it’s been out today honey” 

“Wow, it fits” Vilkas said surprised “I’ve never had armour that fits properly before” Joshua smiled

“You’re surprised, Hircine is a Daedric Prince after all”


	20. Sinding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas unveils a surprise and it seems Ondolemar made quite an impression...

“I still don’t know where we’re going” Joshua complained “this isn’t the way home”

“No, it’s the way to something I want to show you” Vilkas replied “It’s a surprise” Joshua grinned at him

“Well, if you put it like that, how can I refuse, I love surprises don’t I On….” He stopped when he saw the expression on his friends face and grinned “I know that look, you think Sinding’s hot” Ondolemar’s cheeks went bright orange

“I don’t” he said

“Liar” accused Joshua, grinning widely. Ondolemar looked to Vilkas for help

“Sorry friend, you’re on your own this time” he grinned

“We’ll look him up if we ever get where we’re going” Joshua said

“Stop complaining” he scolded good naturedly “We’ll be there soon”

They walked until they reached a Nordic Homestead and Vilkas stopped, Joshua looked at him

“Well, what do you think?” Vilkas asked, Joshua looked confused “Inigo said you’d been given a piece of land and you had no plans for it so I thought it might be a nice location for a home for us, Farkas and Inigo helped me to build it. Learning curve that was, are you angry?” Joshua stood there for a moment and then pulled Vilkas into his arms kissing him

“I love it” he said “just a bit of a shock, when did you find the time?”

“Well, Ondolemar had a lot to do with that, all those times he needed you to accompany him somewhere and Inigo had something else to do, he was getting you out of the way so we had some build time, but it’s finally finished” he smiled. “Do you want to look inside?”

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Joshua had spent a happy hour just looking round the house, he seemed especially pleased with the small greenhouse Vilkas has put on the side of the kitchen and the alchemy tower, Ondolemar spent the time in the library looking up references to the mystery armour given by Hircine. Vilkas found Joshua in the kitchen preparing them dinner

“I love the kitchen, I’ve made Apple Dumplings for dessert” he grinned indicating the pastry pockets cooling on the side

“I’m glad you like it, I was becoming unsure”, Joshua came over and kissed him

“Dinners ready, go get Ondolemar and Inigo” he smiled and took the food through to the table

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas and Joshua were sat after dinner; Ondolemar and Inigo were doing the dishes

“Armour of the Saviours Hide” Vilkas said thoughtfully

“That’s what Mar thinks, fits the description, pretty nice, it’ll keep…” they were disturbed by a loud thump outside the front door, they looked at each other and headed for the door, their companions joining them. Joshua opened it fire spell readied and found a dead deer with a note ‘Ondolemar’ it said. 

‘Mating gift’ Vilkas thought

“Seems it’s for you” he looked at Ondolemar “do you want Inigo to clean it?” he asked gently, looking at his friends shocked face “I know you hate to see them dead like this” Ondolemar nodded numbly and went back into the house, Joshua followed and Vilkas helped the Khajiit take the carcass somewhere he could clean it easily, when he returned Joshua was sat with Ondolemar

“Is that some kind of strange Nord tradition, say thank you for healing me by depositing a dead animal on their doorstep, Auri-El I miss the isles” he said as Vilkas entered

“No not really” he replied sitting down, “It is a werewolf thing though, some not all bring a fresh kill to the object of their desire, as a gift and to show they are a proficient hunter” Joshua tried to look offended and failed, choosing instead to grin

“No dead deer for me huh” he said “don’t love me enough for that, I get it” he joked, Vilkas grinned wickedly

“Fenrir will happily provide you with a kill if you want one my love, I just thought you not being a werewolf you’d prefer a house instead” he said and gave Joshua a light kiss

“Gods yes” Joshua smiled, then he turned to Ondolemar “seems like you’ve got an admirer” he said grinning

“It would seem so yes” Ondolemar answered thoughtfully


	21. A Rescue from the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sinding takes an opportunity to repay their kindness

Ondolemar saw the campfire a way down the road and soon realised he would have to walk past it. In these times it literally could be anything although for him, anything was pretty bad, it could be bandits, he reasoned. It wasn’t, as he grew closer he heard distinct Altmer tones, ‘Damn’ he thought to himself, ‘Thalmor operatives’. His time in Cidhna Mine had given him time to think about what he wanted from the rest of his life and his rescue had given him the opportunity to leave it all behind, they were bound to recognise him. He pulled his hood down lower and journeyed on, he’d almost made it past them when they noticed him

“Hey you stop” they called out

“I’m just a simple traveller, trying to get home” he called out and kept walking, unfortunately they weren’t in an accepting mood

“Then you have no reason not to stop and talk to us then have you” one of them said and walked over to him, he gasped and his tone altered

“Commander, I’m so sorry, we didn’t recognise you” the guard said “we were informed you were killed in the riot, you should inform the ambassador of your survival immediately”

“Sorry, you must have me confused with someone else, I’m just a simple trader, no such grand title for me” he was starting to panic now, they were going to force him back into that office

“No I’m sure, I met you once, my brother Erron was on your protection detail, he was killed in the battle for Markarth” he said. 

Ondolemar was in full panic mode by now, he liked his life now, he even had someone interested in him romantically or so it would seem, although he’d heard nothing from his suitor for a couple of weeks, he would go out onto the balcony at night and watch, some nights he felt a presence, like someone was with him, out in the darkness. He wished as he had on many occasions that he had Sindill’s strength. It seemed the guard expected an answer

“I am very sorry for your loss but you have the wrong person” and he tried to walk away, but found his way blocked “please let me through, I am expected at home”

“No, I don’t think we’re going to do that, you can come to the Embassy and have your story checked, if you’re telling the truth you have nothing to worry about”

Suddenly Ondolemar did something for himself, took a stand for something that he wanted, he’d joined the Dominion to please his father, he hadn’t wanted the position of High Commander, he took it because it was expected of him, right now in this crazy moment, he decided he wasn’t going back to the Thalmor, people no longer hated him on sight and he liked it. 

“You will never take me to that Den of Death” he hissed, his hands were instantly sheathed in Lightning, his decision felt right and it gave him a confidence that he’d never felt before, he felt the magic running through him, he’d hit Erron’s brother before he realised it was happening, the other guard threw a bolt at him but he warded himself against it, sending a reply. He knew there was no way he was getting out of this alive, he didn’t have sufficient magic to battle two Thalmor soldiers but at least he’d die free. He hoped Sindill would understand

“If that’s how it must be High Commander, so be it” Erron’s brother said and they both hit him at once, he managed to ward one but the other hit him squarely knocking his ability to cast for a moment, a moment was all they needed and the guard who hadn’t spoken hit him again and it knocked him off balance and he hit his head hard against a tree, before he lost consciousness for what he was sure would be the last time, he heard screams of agony and snarling.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas was awakened suddenly but he couldn’t see why, there were no lights on and Joshua was sleeping peacefully beside him, he was about to snuggle back down when he heard the front door slam open and a strange voice calling for help, Fenrir snarled and he immediately knew who was calling, he looked at Joshua who had been awakened by the noise and was looking disorientated, Vilkas leapt out of bed and grabbed his trousers taking the stairs two at a time, he was joined by Rayya, he reached the front hall and saw a naked Sinding attempting to make Ondolemar more comfortable, he looked at Vilkas with fear in his eyes and lifted his hand up, it was covered in fresh blood

“Ondolemar” Joshua cried and rushed to his friend’s side “what happened?” he looked at Sinding

“Thalmor, attacked him on the road, I was too slow, he banged his head hard on a tree, he’s bleeding pretty bad” Sinding looked at Joshua his expression pleading

“Its okay” Vilkas reassured him “Joshua’s a healer, he’ll fix him right up” Joshua felt the back of Ondolemar’s head and his hand started to glow, after a few minutes he fell back and leaned against the cupboard

“Can someone take him to bed please, I don’t think I could carry him” Rayya stepped forward to move him and Sinding rushed to his side growling protectively

“Perhaps you should let Sinding carry him, could you get us some water he needs cleaning up, thank you Rayya” Joshua said diplomatically

“Of course my Thane” she said glad to have a duty to perform

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When Ondolemar opened his eyes he was surprised to find the afterlife looked a lot like Sindill and Vilkas’s house, it took a few seconds for him to realise he wasn’t dead. His brain ran over the memories it had before he blacked out and he remembered the snarling and the screams, he sat up and was surprised to find that he had no headache ‘how long have I been out?’ he asked himself. He strained for sounds of movement and heard none, it was quite dark, then a movement next to him made him turn and a candle was lit, once his eyes had adjusted he saw that it was Sinding, the werewolf they had saved from the soldiers and his admirer, he smiled

“You’re awake” he whispered, it would seem that he was sleeping on a bedroll next to Ondolemar

“How long was I out” he asked, his voice came out dry and raspy

“It’s been two days since you thought it was a good idea to fight two Thalmor on your own” he smiled still keeping his voice at a whisper level “Your friends were very worried about you” Ondolemar took his hand

“Thank you” Ondolemar said “I know you saved me”

“Your friend did most of the work but you’re welcome, you’re just lucky I was tracking you, otherwise it could have been different, I have to ask are you generally suicidal, or did you think they wouldn’t attack their High Commander, yeah I know who you are, I saw you a few times in Markarth”

“You saw me in Markarth” Ondolemar said not quite believing he’d heard correctly. Sinding smiled

“Yeah, I do business with the Orc, Moth, so I saw you pacing up and down like a caged animal. Sometimes I used to just sit and watch you walk don’t know why” he shrugged his shoulders

“Why did you never approach me?” he asked

“I’m a common werewolf and you were High Commander of the Thalmor not really appropriate” he smiled, Ondolemar tried to think what Sindill would say, but could come up with nothing, Ondolemar smiled to himself, it would seem invoking his inner Sindill was not all that easy, maybe he just didn’t possess it. He was saved from embarrassing himself by a figure appearing in the doorway

“You’re awake then” a quiet voice said, it was Vilkas

“Sorry Vilkas, did we wake you” Ondolemar said feeling slightly guilty

“Aye, but it’s alright, you didn’t wake the bear so I can let it go” he grinned, Ondolemar let out a small giggle, Sindill didn’t respond well to being woken

“How you feeling?” he asked

“Pretty good, thanks to my hero here” it was dark but he was sure he saw Sinding’s face colour slightly. Vilkas smiled and left the two alone, it wasn’t long before Ondolemar started to doze, Sinding settled back on the bedroll on the floor and Ondolemar couldn’t help but be a little disappointed that he had to let go of his hand, before sleep finally took him a thought occurred to him

“Sinding” he said quietly

“Yeah” he replied, leaning up on one elbow looking up at the Elf

“Thank you for the gift, it was very thoughtful”

“You’re very welcome” Sinding said and Ondolemar knew he heard a smile.


	22. Ondolemar Confides

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ondolemar confides in Joshua about his growing feelings for Sinding

Ondolemar was sitting out on the balcony staring at the stars, he heard the door open behind him and Joshua came out and sat with him

“You’re down because he left aren’t you” he said putting his hand on his friends arm supportively

“He saved my life and I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye, he left while I was sleeping” Ondolemar said sadly

“He told Vil that he had things he needed to take care of, he said he got the feeling we’d see him again” he smiled “so don’t worry”

“He’s been watching me for a while, he recognised me from Markarth, said I used to pace up and down like a caged animal and to be honest with you Sin, I felt like a caged animal, I was more scared of them taking me back to that office or one just like it than I was of dying, at least I’d die free. I hoped you would understand” he said putting his hand over his friends

“I would, better to die free than live in a cage, plus you know I never wanted you to join the Dominion, I thought it a bad idea, but I don’t know whether Sinding and Vilkas would, seems Sinding has a crush on you and Vilkas can’t imagine life without you” Ondolemar looked at him surprised “he told me, the other night when you woke him” he explained

“Gods Sin, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to wake either of you” he said, guilt rearing its head

“Don’t worry about it, you didn’t wake me Vilkas did coming back to bed, he was concerned that’s all, Sinding is not that mentally stable, apparently it happens sometimes when you become a werewolf, plus he’s alone, Vil has his pack, Sinding has no one, that can send you a little crazy, believe me I know” he said, Ondolemar looked at him

“You’ve never been alone ever” he said seriously “I’ve always been there for you. Sin, I love you I always have and I always will, every man I’ve ever been interested in lasts until I compare them to you, they never measure up, that is…until Sinding and I have no idea where he is, or even if he’s safe”

“Then we’ll find him and you two can talk. Trust me, he’s feeling it too, he sat and stared at you, gently moving the hair out of your face and holding your hand when you were unconscious and if Rayya even went near you, he would snarl at her, he was displaying all the hallmarks of protecting his mate, he may just be afraid that you won’t feel the same way. It’s harder for them, they mate for life and if the wolf loves you, then they fall hard”

“Like you and Vilkas?” he asked reeling from this new information

“Yeah, Fenrir loves me, imprinted on me from our first meeting, but its okay, I don’t want anyone but Vilkas, before him I thought I wouldn’t settle down because they weren’t you” he smiled “I missed you”

“I missed you too old friend” Ondolemar smiled “it’s nice to have you back in my life, even if you are married to a werewolf” his face changed to one of confusion “Where is Rayya?” he asked

“Falkreath, said that the house was getting a little crazy for her with Sinding growling at her every time she went near you, so she’s staying at her lovers home until Sinding’s gone, we haven’t told her yet, she creeps Vilkas out” he grinned

“She is a little intense, takes her job as housecarl very seriously” Ondolemar smiled “you said we could find him, how? We wouldn’t know where to start”

“Fenrir” Joshua smiled “he can track him, why do you want him to, I’ll go ask” he went to get up but Ondolemar stopped him

“He has things to do, I get the feeling if you’re right, I won’t have to wait long for him to return” he smiled

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

A couple of nights later, he was sat on the balcony as he did every night, Joshua and Vilkas had returned to Whiterun for a few days, for Vilkas to check in with the Companions. He was thinking about the talk he and Sindill had, had the other night, he was pleased that he meant that much to him, even though they could never be together. This fact he found did not bother him as much as before, he smiled at the thought of the man who’d made such a difference, who’d watched him from afar, who accepted him, even wanted him when he was a Thalmor. This thought gave him a warm feeling inside. He heard movement at the base of the stairs and sighed, probably just that bloody Giant come to steal Sindill’s cow again. He walked with fire bolt ready to the top of the stairs but instead of a Giant his eyes met those of a small Nord, the man smiled when he saw him

“You’re up and about” he said “I’m glad, I came to check on you, but I thought no one was here, no lights” he explained

“Didn’t seem much point, I’m the only one here, come up” he offered

“I don’t want to disturb you, I just came to check on you” he said

“Please, you’re not disturbing me, I’d love you to come up”, Sinding thought about this for a moment

“You will say if I am, I don’t want you to tolerate my presence out of politeness” he said earnestly, Ondolemar chuckled and the Nord looked confused

“Tolerating anyone is not a skill I possess” he said as Sinding joined him “I thought you said you saw me in Markarth”

“I did, I just thought your guards annoyed you” he grinned 

“They did” he admitted, “along with pretty much everyone else in that god’s forsaken town”

“They were trying to get you to go back to the Thalmor, surely that would be better than dying out on the road somewhere, alone” Sinding said, Sindill’s words came back to him about Sinding being alone in the world, without a pack to support him

“What happened to your pack?” he asked, “sorry, that was personal, forget I asked” he added quickly

“No, it’s okay, I never had a pack, I was attacked in the wilds, I never understood the change or took it willingly, I struggle to control it, unlike your friend” he said sadly

“He struggled with it too, until he met Sindill, now he finds it easier”

“I’m confused, everyone but you call him Joshua” he asked feeling comfortable in the elf’s company

“Long story, Sindill is the name given to him by his parents, things happened, bad things. I think he just wants to forget the pain, hence the name change. He’s distancing himself from it all” he explained “It’s hard when you’ve called someone something all your life to break the habit” he smiled, Sinding smiled back

“That interfering female isn’t here then” he suddenly said “I think she likes you, she kept trying to be alone with you”

“Rayya, she’s Sindill’s housecarl and I agree she is a little pushy, I’m glad I didn’t wake up to her, it was much nicer waking up to you”, the Nord didn’t seem to know what to say to this and was quiet for a moment

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’m not really used to this” he said his cheeks turning orange. Sinding took his hand

“You’re not making me uncomfortable, don’t worry, people don’t really like me, they say I’m emotionally and mentally unstable. I suppose they’re right, I am, but in my defence being a werewolf doesn’t help, I just tend to stay away, harder with you though, haven’t been able to get you off my mind since the first time I saw you, you probably don’t even remember it” he said

Ondolemar looked at him sadly, he didn’t and said as much “Perhaps if you reminded me” he said hopefully

“You were doing your usual caged animal impression and I was coming up the stairs and your guard bumped me making me drop all the weapons I’d brought to sell to Moth, you gave him a right telling off, made him apologise to me, that really touched me, aside from the fact that you’re gorgeous, you stood up for me, didn’t make me feel like it was my fault, that was nice” he smiled. Ondolemar’s face lit up

“That was you, I remember, he was so clumsy, we helped you pick up your goods, he offered to help you carry them but you refused, I thought he’d annoyed you”

“No, it was fine, just so used to coping on my own that it kind of becomes second nature”, he got up, “well I should be going, thank you for a lovely evening, maybe we could do it again” he asked hopefully

“I would love that” Ondolemar said, he was shocked by Sinding kissing him, not enough to stop him responding enthusiastically

“I couldn’t wait any longer to do that” he grinned and then was gone, leaving Ondolemar to walk into the house with a smile on his face that was threatening to do him an injury if it got much bigger


	23. A New Pack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas has an offer for Sinding

Ondolemar was sitting outside with Joshua and Vilkas, they had returned from Whiterun earlier that day

“So, we’re having another wedding, no Dragons this time though, would say no Vampires but Johnny and Farkas really hit it off and I think he wants a rematch with Blaze” Joshua was filling Ondolemar in on news from Jorrvaskr, “well enough about us, come on, tell, he visited I know that” he probed

“How did…Vilkas told you” he looked at them

Joshua grinned

“Nope, didn’t need to, I know you Mar, something happened when we were away, he visited…”

“Visiting” Vilkas said pointing towards the stairs

They turned to see Sinding stood at the top, looking nervous

“Come, sit, you’re welcome, actually we’re glad” he looked up at Vilkas who nodded “we’re actually glad you’ve visited, we have an offer for you. If you’re interested”

“I’m listening” Sinding said suspiciously and sat very close to Ondolemar, seemingly for protection

“Okay, well we’ve just been home to Vilkas’s pack, they want you to join, become part of it. You’re life really doesn’t have to change but you will have the support of your pack brothers and sister, you’re no longer alone, if you don’t want to be. We’ll leave you for a while to think it over”

Vilkas and Joshua got up and went into the house, Ondolemar got up to leave but Sinding stopped him

“Stay, please” he said “I have something I came to say and the outcome of this will greatly influence my decision on your friends kind offer, I never believed that a relationship with you would be possible, we were just too different, you were High Commander of the Thalmor, I was a common dungeon diving werewolf, but things have changed, Vilkas and Joshua have given me hope that you, maybe, could one day love me”

“I don’t think that one day I will, no” Ondolemar smiled, leaning over to kiss him gently “I think today I do”

Sinding knelt up and took him in his arms and kissed him more deeply, more passionately.

“Wow, Sindill’s not wrong, you werewolves are passionate creatures” he smiled

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they came into the house they heard Vilkas call from their bedroom that they were in there, Joshua lay with Vilkas rubbing his head and fussing his hair

“You’ve got a Migraine, why did you not say something?” Ondolemar scolded and went to his storage area to fetch a potion but Joshua refused

“Thanks Mar, but too late” he tried to smile but failed, “group of Thalmor chancers thought they’d take us on, I showed them the error of their ways, they face Auri-El wiser men and a woman, took all my magic though”

“I’m surprised, they must be new” Ondolemar said

“Why?” Vilkas asked suspiciously

“Because if they were experienced Justicars they wouldn’t have touched Sindill because of his dossier” Ondolemar explained

“My Dossier?” Joshua asked opening his eyes “What Dossier?”

Ondolemar smiled

“It’s quite a document, at least half inch thick, mind you seeing who your father is I’m not surprised it’s so detailed, but most importantly on the front it says ’Extremely Dangerous! Do Not Engage!’”

“Yeah, well, I’m the product of his creation, he made me this dangerous” then he groaned and closed his eyes again

“Have you made a decision?” Vilkas asked quietly

“Yes” Sinding answered “I would be honoured to join your pack, brother Vilkas” he grinned

“Welcome brother Sinding”

 


	24. Love Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ondolemar and Sinding's relationship takes the next step, with a little help from their friends

A week had passed since the night that Sinding had joined the pack, he’d not really left Ondolemar’s side since, they hadn’t been more intimate than passionate kisses and the Altmer was becoming frustrated. He looked up as Joshua came out with a glass of Brandy for him, he sat down and took a swig from his mead bottle

“You’re quite embracing the life here aren’t you” he smiled and Joshua smiled back

“I’ve been a mead drinker for a while” he confessed “although I have to admit the Breton mead is better, don’t tell Vilkas I said that though, he’s very proud of the Nordic stuff” Ondolemar smiled then stared out into the darkness again, “What’s wrong Mar? You seem unhappy” he asked obviously concerned “It’s alright, you can talk, Sinding and Vilkas have gone out to do ‘wolf stuff’ with Aela and Farkas, welcome him into the clan” he looked at him expectantly

“How long was it before you and Vilkas were intimate?” he asked nervously

“From when? Our first meeting, our first kiss?” Joshua asked

“It doesn’t matter, forget I said anything” he said quietly

“Have you and Sinding not been intimate yet” he said “He may be nervous, he’s liked you for a long time and may just be enjoying being with you” Joshua said, “give it time, he’ll make his move” he squeezed his friends hand “and he’s been alone for a while, it takes time to adjust, Vilkas was incredibly patient with me” he advised

“Change of subject, White again?” he said indicating Joshua’s hair

“Vilkas” he stated “he wanted to see me with my natural hair, he likes it and he wants me to leave it. You know I can’t say no to him” he grinned.

There was a loud noise at the bottom of the stairs,

“Gods, get the message, it’s my bloody cow” he stormed over to the steps, Ondolemar following

Sure enough the giant was trying to coax the cow to leave with him

“Piss off” Joshua shouted sending an ice bolt towards the giant and it turned and shook its club at him

“Ooh I’m scared” he taunted and his hand was sheathed in fire

There was a snarl from the trees and the giant was knocked over by a large ball of fur, two others followed and the giant was soon dead, ripped apart

“Fenrir, what did I say about killing stuff where we have to clean it up hmm?” he asked the first wolf, it looked positively guilty “oh don’t look like that, I hate it when you give me those eyes” the werewolf grinned

The wolf pack were joined by their sister and they went round to the front of the house. The four of them came out cleaned and dressed a few moments later. Vilkas came straight to Joshua and kissed him,

“I’m sorry baby” he said

“It’s alright, but I’m not removing it tonight, it can wait until morning.” He said passing his mead bottle to his husband

Sinding went and sat with Ondolemar putting his head on his lovers lap. He seemed troubled somehow, Ondolemar looked at Joshua

“Would you do something for me?” he asked

“Anything” Joshua said

“Ice Lily, it’s been so long since I’ve seen it and Sinding never has”

Joshua smiled

“What’s an Ice Lily?” Aela asked confused

“You haven’t shown them” Ondolemar asked surprised

“Vilkas I have” he said

He lifted his hand and it was instantly sheathed in an icy fog, as they watched the fog all gathered together and turned into the most beautiful flower they’d ever seen, then it seemed to float away as if a breeze had caught it

“Divines, that was beautiful” Farkas said, “is that what you told me about Vil?”

“Aye, my mage is talented as well as gorgeous” he grinned wickedly

Sinding looked up at Ondolemar with awe on his face

“Can you do that?” he asked

“No” Ondolemar smiled

“Liar” said Joshua “You can do the Fire Rose, I taught you”

Ondolemar blushed as he remembered his reward for mastering it

“Show us” Sinding said

Ondolemar made the Fireball appear then with great concentration he turned it into a Rose

“That’s incredible” Sinding said “You are amazing”

‘If I’m so amazing why won’t you be intimate with me’ Ondolemar thought

Joshua seemed to sense his friends discomfort because he got up and went towards the house

“Come on you three, if you’re anything like Vilkas you need tea and desserts after a hunt”

The Companions followed him into the house, Sinding didn’t follow choosing to stay with Ondolemar, he could stay silent no longer

“Where is this going?” he asked, perhaps not the most tactful way of asking but he wasn’t good at this kind of thing

Sinding tensed but didn’t reply, Ondolemar’s heart sank

“I’m not what you want am I, I haven’t lived up to the fantasy, it’s okay” he said tears threatening to form but he fought them

Sinding looked into his eyes with an expression of pure love

“You’re more than I could have imagined, it’s just I’m not sure you are completely over Joshua, if he wanted you back, I think you’d go” he said “if I make love to you, I won’t recover from you leaving”

Ondolemar stroked his lovers face

“Sindill and I are long over” he sighed “we are still in love, I won’t deny it and for a long time I hoped he would come back, even after he met Vilkas I kept hoping it would fall apart and he’d come to me to pick up the pieces, I know what a horrible person that makes me but I couldn’t help it and then we walked into that grove and my life changed forever, you are my Vilkas, you were the one who not only measured up but surpassed, apparently that’s why Sin had not settled down before, no one measured up to me” he explained

Sinding thought about this for a moment

“Mine?” he questioned hopefully

“Yours” Ondolemar confirmed

They didn’t get to say anymore because the door opened and Aela came out with an Apple Dumpling in her hand

“If you two want some tea and sweet treats you’d better come soon, before our brothers eat them all” she grinned and they followed her into the house

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The house was fairly crowded for the next few nights as their pack siblings stayed to get to know Sinding and Inigo had returned from a hunting trip. They understood their new clan brothers reluctance to enter towns after what had happened in Falkreath, Sinding was stood on the balcony outside looking down at an altar where a Necromancer was pursuing the dark arts, Aela and Farkas had spoken to her earlier, warning her of the terrible things that could befall her if anything happened to the residents of the nearby house. He heard the door open behind him and moments later strong arms encircled him

“Why are you hiding out here” Ondolemar asked quietly, knowing that Sinding had demons in his past

“Not hiding, watching” he said pointing at the Necromancer “I don’t understand”

“Necromancy is a great deal of power, quickly” he explained “usually because it’s powered by a Daedric Prince, that kind of power quickly becomes addictive”

“Joshua is a necromancer?” Sinding asked looking at Ondolemar shocked, his lover matched his face

“No, whatever gives you that idea” he asked

“Joshua worships Meridia, there’s a shrine in the garden by the Apiary, I asked Vilkas about it and he said it was Joshua’s” he explained

Ondolemar smiled

“Not all Daedra worshippers are Necromancers” he explained gently

Sinding looked into his eyes and snaked his arms around his taller lovers neck

“I love you” he murmured and pulled him down for a passionate kiss

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Sinding carried his tea out onto the balcony the following morning and found Vilkas looking at the Altar,

“Sorry, I’m disturbing you” he said, Vilkas turned

“Don’t be silly, I take it Ondolemar is still in bed” he smiled

“Yes” Sinding nodded and turned to go back into the house but stopped “you are my pack brother, we have fought together” he said although Vilkas felt it was more of a question than a statement

“Aye, we are” he said wondering slightly where this was going and why people always cornered him like this when Joshua wasn’t there to save him, for a while Sinding just stared at the altar, at present deserted

“I guess the dark arts, need darkness. Not the same in the brightness of the sun” he said

“I wouldn’t know, magic is Joshua’s area” he grinned “mines more the beat them to death with something”. Sinding’s face grew sad, “what’s wrong?” Vilkas asked

“It can’t work” Sinding said finally

Vilkas took this as a judgement on his relationship and he wouldn’t take that from Farkas so…

“Who in Oblivion are you to judge my relationship?” he asked angrily

He heard the door open behind him but he ignored it, too caught up in the anger, Sinding cowered under his Alpha’s glare. Vilkas felt a familiar hand touch his arm

“And what are you two talking about?” Joshua asked immediately calming Vilkas, he didn’t know how he did it, he was just glad he did

“Apparently, our relationship is doomed to failure” Vilkas snarled his anger growing again

Joshua smiled at him

“Is that what he said baby” he said gazing into his eyes with a love that Vilkas still felt he was unworthy of

“Yes! No, not exactly” Vilkas confessed

“So what did he say, exactly. No Sinding, stay, Ondolemar is still asleep and as he hasn’t slept well lately I think we should leave him, so…”

“I said ‘It can’t work’” Sinding answered quietly

Joshua smiled kindly

“You and Mar?” he asked

“Yes, I thought we could make it work, now he’s as much as an outcast as I am, but it was stupid, we’re just too different, he’s not alone, you protect him. It’s doomed before we start”

“That explains a lot” Joshua said his tone angry

Fenrir growled aggressively.

“Explains what” Sinding asked his anger rising too

“You not wanting to be intimate with him” Joshua said “yeah he told me, makes sense now”

Vilkas was running between anger and confusion, in the end confusion won out

“I don’t understand, what makes sense?” he asked

“He isn’t sleeping with Mar because he’s planning on leaving him, he’s playing with his emotions and yes you’re damn right I do protect what I love” he snapped

Vilkas could feel the anger flowing off him, just like at Driftshade Refuge all that time ago. He put his arm round his lover

“That’s maybe not exactly what he’s doing baby” he said tactfully, the picture becoming clearer

“Then what”

Vilkas flinched slightly as the anger was turned on him

“Sinding has never been taught to control his transformations, living with this without a guide, I can’t imagine what he’s been through. When we make love I lose control of myself, I lose myself in you, but its second nature for me not to switch” he looked at Sinding “You’re worried you’ll turn aren’t you?”

“And rip the man I love to pieces, I killed that child in Falkreath, it’s not an unfounded concern” Sinding’s tone was anger, covering fear and desperation

Vilkas was relieved when Joshua smiled

“Ondolemar isn’t a child nor is he helpless, trust me, he can handle a horny werewolf” he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Ondolemar awoke to a presence near his bed later that night, he struggled to focus and soon realised it was his lover stood there looking down at him,

“Are you okay?” he asked suddenly concerned

“I want…” he said timidly

Ondolemar shuffled across the single bed and lifted the blankets, Sinding got into the bed beside him, wrapping his body around his lovers, he’d been stood outside for Divines knew how long and yet his body still radiated heat, Sinding being so close made intense desire grow in Ondolemar, he wanted him, needed him. He pulled him close and kissed him passionately, Sinding pulled away and started to kiss across his jaw and down to his neck, he was nipping and growling which drove Ondolemar crazy, He tried to fight the urge to groan loudly but his needy desire was winning and he began to forget that anyone but Sinding even existed, his lover trailed his hand down his body stopping at Ondolemar’s waistband, tortuously slowly he undid the fastenings and removed them, growling with pleasure of the sight of his exposed body, he grinned wickedly and started to kiss and nip all the way down to the Elf’s throbbing cock, he licked teasingly around the head, running his tongue across the slit making Ondolemar shiver with pleasure,

“Please” he groaned desperate now, all the attention was driving him mad with lust

“Mmm” Sinding moaned and took it into his mouth fully

Ondolemar groaned, he couldn’t stop it

‘Gods, he’s good at this’ he thought to himself

It wasn’t long before he was trying to stop Sinding, to warn him that he was going to release, but his lover didn’t stop at his protests and soon the Elf was unable to hold back any longer, once done Sinding came back up but refused to kiss him, going back to his neck once more, Ondolemar forced him to kiss him,

“Will you touch me?” Sinding asked nervously

Ondolemar smiled and pushed him down on the bed, unfastening his trousers and taking him in hand, gently caressing him until he felt wetness spill, Sinding kissed him and then to Ondolemar’s delight he snuggled into the Elves arms

“I assume then you’re staying” he said smiling

“Yes” Sinding said simply, settling down for sleep

 


	25. Picnic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas makes a life changing decision

The picnic had been Joshua’s idea, they’d been laid in bed that morning and he’d suggested it. Vilkas had to admit, now they were laid here in the early afternoon sun, completely alone, that it had its merits. He leaned over and took a peach out of the bag, Joshua groaned as Bran brought the stick back and shook all over him

“I told you not to throw it in the water” Vilkas gloated grinning

“I thought it might discourage her” Joshua said smiling and throwing the stick again

“Well you taught her to play” he said suddenly getting lost in his husbands eyes, it seemed so long since they’d been alone together “you know I don’t know how I’m supposed to do anything with you laying there looking so damn tempting” he smiled lustily at him

Joshua pulled him down and proceeded to clean the peach juice from his face,

“I want you” he moaned when they broke to breathe

“Here?” Vilkas asked, but his face said he was open to the idea, sex at home was pretty much impossible at the moment

“Here” Joshua confirmed untying the fastening to Vilkas’s shirt and running his hands over his lovers bared chest making him groan with pleasure, he started to nip at his throat and up to his ears, “Gods you turn me on” he whispered as he rubbed himself against him

Vilkas could hardly contain himself, he rolled Joshua over his lover linking his legs around his waist, he started licking and nipping Joshua’s ear, the elf was quickly coming undone and Vilkas wanted to try something new

“I want you to make love to me” he whispered in his ear

“I’ve never done that before” Joshua said looking into his eyes

“First time for us both” he said, “I wanted to…” he stopped “no it’s silly”

“You wanted to what?” Joshua asked although he thought he might know “keep something special for your husband” he said smiling

“Yes, you think it’s silly” Vilkas said feeling a little foolish

“It’s my first time for the same reason baby, something I only do with him” he murmured “thinking about it is doing things to me”

He put Vilkas hand on his crotch and groaned as his husband rubbed, gently teasing him, knowing he’d get his revenge soon enough, he pushed Vilkas back onto the blanket, and laid above him, just gazing at him

“I don’t deserve you” he murmured not taking his eyes off him

“Come here” Vilkas said huskily pulling his husband down for a kiss

Gods he felt so damn good, he fiddled in the bag and brought out a bottle of oil ‘He came prepared’ he thought to himself, he helped Joshua out of his trousers and removed his own, Joshua settled himself between Vilkas’s legs, he oiled up two fingers and went to the sensitive opening but as he pushed one finger inside, he took his throbbing member into his mouth Vilkas almost released then with the utter pleasure

“Gods Josh” he gasped and gripped the blanket

“Mhmm” he said mouth still clasped round

“You’ve never done that before” he whispered huskily

He looked up into his eyes and removed him for a second

“Do you want me to stop?” he asked mischievously

“Gods no” Vilkas gasped as he took him back into his throat “Oh baby, I’m gonna…”

His sentence broke into incoherent mumblings as he started to pump down his lovers throat, his fingers touching that spot inside, when he’d calmed down a little he drew Joshua up to him and looked him deep in the eyes

“Take me” he said desperately

His lover needed no further encouragement, he slipped into the entrance

“Tell me if I hurt you” he said

Although he was desperate to be inside of him, he knew how it felt the first time and it could be painful, so he held himself in check, he never minded being the one giving the pleasure, Vilkas’s reactions were enough to excite him, before long though he was inside and taking immense pleasure at just being there, Vilkas brought him back a little by saying that he was ready

“I’m not going to last long, you’re really tight and I’m pretty excited” he warned

“I don’t care” Vilkas said gazing into his eyes “Fuck me”

His voice was full of desire so Joshua started to slowly move, groaning incoherently and gasping Vilkas’s name

‘Gods I’m getting close again’ he thought

He went to touch himself but Joshua’s hand was there first gently stroking him in time to his movements, they got lost in each other for a moment, enjoying coming together. Joshua flopped down on the blanket beside him and after a moment cuddled into his husbands arms

“Wow” was all he could manage

Vilkas grinned

“See what happens when you go dungeon diving and leave me all alone” he said jokily

Joshua however took it a little more seriously than he’d meant

“You could come with me” he said quietly, still recovering

Vilkas was shocked,

“Are you serious?” he asked hopefully

He couldn’t deny the idea had occurred to him, it was just that Inigo always went with Joshua

“Yes, why are you considering it?”

Joshua pushed himself up on one elbow and looked Vilkas in the eyes, excitement and hope shone there

“Aye, if you want me”

Joshua leaned up and kissed the quiet Nord passionately,

“I can’t think of anyone better” he said truthfully


	26. Dawnguard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vilkas meets the Dawnguard

Vilkas was nervous, he’d never approached a guild for membership before, they’d decided when they were children to join the Companions, they stopped by an unassuming tree stump and Joshua began to strip, Inigo went and stood watch, he pulled a set of armour out of the tree and put it on

“That Breton was right” Vilkas said “you do look incredibly hot in it”

Joshua grinned at him

“Doesn’t make a single difference, I’m not wearing it, period” he said “don’t tell Mar, he’d never let me forget it”

“My lips are sealed” he smiled to himself, Ondolemar had really come out of his shell lately, Joshua told him he was more like he used to be, before the Dominion “I’m not wearing it, I don’t care what they say” Vilkas said defiantly 

“Yeah, but you can say ‘I’m wearing Hircine’s boon’, they can’t argue with that, all I can say is ‘I’m wearing clothes I bought off a Khajiit in a tent, doesn’t really have the same ring really” he grinned “Right I’m ready let's go”

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas stood waiting off to the side alone, Inigo had wandered through to the back to see friends and Joshua was talking to someone called Isran, his husband waved him over

“Joshua tells me you’re an excellent fighter, a Companion and a werewolf and you want to join?” he asked abruptly, Vilkas face turned to anger and looked at Joshua, Isran noticed “being a werewolf is an advantage when fighting Vampires, you can smell them in a crowd” he said

“Pretty much why we have Bran” he said pointing at her rolling around the floor playing with Sceolang

“So are you interested in joining the fight or what?” Isran asked abruptly

“Yes” said Vilkas, he appreciated the no nonsense approach of this Redguard

“Good, looks like you’re kitted as far as armour and weapons are concerned, just put this badge on you somewhere then it distinguishes you as a friendly” he looked at Joshua “here’s one for you too, you can stop stashing your armour outside”

“How…” Joshua said

“Sceolang, he runs up to that tree stump every time we let him out, curiosity got the better of us” he smiled and shook his head “okay, we take the hint, get something to eat then come find me I have a task for you” he walked away and left the two lovers alone

“Welcome to the Dawnguard” Joshua said kissing him lightly

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They were eating and a Breton male came in, helped himself to food and came over to join them

“Jadisth Buckingoud” he said putting his hand out

“Vilkas” he said taking his hand and shaking it

“Ah the famous Vilkas” he said between bites, “Joshua talks about you all the time”

“Not that much” Joshua’s face began to brighten

“He does” Jadisth smiled at Joshua “I see now why”

“Paws off Jadisth” Joshua said sternly pushing his wedding ring into view “he’s mine”

“You said something about a twin brother” Jadisth grinned

“Likes women and is getting married” Joshua grinned widely

“You know how I like a challenge” the Breton smiled, they got up to go find out what Isran wanted them to do “besides Durak says I hit like a woman”

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

“Who’s that talking to Isran?” Vilkas asked

“Vigilant of Stendarr, looks unwelcome” Joshua said, Inigo joined them and they went up to Isran “everything alright here?” he asked

“Ah Joshua, good, I have a task for you, it seems the nearby hall of Vigilant was attacked by Vampires, we need to know what they wanted” Isran said

Vilkas got the feeling he didn’t care much either way, he got the feeling that helping the Vigilant was the last thing on his mind

“We need to travel to Dimhollow Crypt, the Vampires need something there very badly, we want to get to it first, I will meet you there, but please make haste, time is very much against us”

“As is it always” Inigo commented, Isran agreed

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They had packed up and were just about to leave when they heard a voice calling them back

“You may as well take him as well, he’s next to useless pining for Bran when she’s away” he said sending Sceolang over to them

“Cool, thanks” Joshua said and patted his thigh and Bran was by his side

Vilkas waited until he was out of the door before he tried it, to his surprise Sceolang was beside him in seconds waiting for a command

“Good boy” Vilkas patted his head

 


	27. Serana

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua's adopted family gets a little bigger

When they arrived at Dimhollow Crypt the Vigilant wasn’t waiting for them outside, Joshua cursed loudly

“You cannot control the actions of others my friend, he made the choice to enter without us, his fate is the consequence of that decision” Inigo stated wisely

“I know, but you know what his fate was” Joshua replied

Inigo nodded

“He is with S’rendarr now” the Khajiit said sadly

They entered the crypt and Joshua immediately indicated for them to be silent, they heard voices down the corridor. They were saddened to hear of the death of Vigilant Tolan, even though it was expected, they took the Vampires by surprise so the battle was short but bloody, Vilkas’s anger over the senseless death of the fellow demon hunter boiled and he found it difficult to control Fenrir, his wolf hated Vampires and it took every ounce of control he had not to shift. Joshua seemed to sense this and came over to calm him, Inigo walked over to the dead Vigilant, taking something from him

“S'rendarr we beg you, guide your child to your loving embrace” he said reverently

Vilkas dropped his head and they shared a moments silence for their fallen comrade, once done he turned to Inigo

“What did you take from him?” he asked as they made their way further into the ruin

“His Dagger, it is inscribed with runes indicating it was his, it will be returned to them so it may be placed with honour in the Hall of Hero’s” he explained

“I didn’t realise they did that” Vilkas said

“Neither did I until Inigo told me” Joshua said smiling, “we’ve returned four so far, this one will be number five, far too many”

“Are they all as foolish?” Vilkas asked his experience with the Vigilantes was limited

“Pretty much yeah” Joshua sighed

They fought their way through the ruin, Vilkas had to give in to impulse and shift, his anger became too much, he felt free, it was strange as he’d never felt this on a hunt, Fenrir seemed to gain satisfaction from killing the Vampires, it was strange and something he wanted to discuss with Joshua and Ondolemar when this was over

They reached a strange circular room with braziers placed around a central one, it was a puzzle and thanks to Inigo’s curious nature and inability not to push a button if he is presented with one it was solved fairly quickly

“Has your button pushing obsession ever been dangerous?”

Inigo went to answer but Vilkas caught the look on Joshua’s face, Inigo giggled

“Yes my friend, Joshua once got locked in a ‘cell’ in a Dwemer ruin for two hours because I pressed the button to shut the door, I could not find the release”

Joshua was laughing now

“Me and Bran” he corrected “she was not impressed”

Once it was activated the floor dropped to reveal a Sarcophagus, once it was opened Vilkas was shocked to find it contained a woman, she introduced herself as Serana and after a brief talk asked them to accompany her home

“Of course” Vilkas said immediately

Joshua looked at Inigo and rolled his eyes, his husband saw this

“What?” he asked

“Nothing, you just can’t resist a damsel in distress” he teased

Although there was an edge of jealousy to his voice, something which Vilkas failed to notice

“Well, as I once said I am an honourable warrior and it wouldn’t be true if I left the lady here would it”

Leaving proved more difficult than they’d thought, after a couple of gargoyles, they came into a room with Skeletons and a Dragon Priest sitting around the arena, Joshua suddenly changed,

“Take the Skeletons, the priest is mine” he said heading towards it

As he did so it rose into the air and shouted, Joshua shouted back and added a duel shock to it,

Vilkas didn’t see any more of the fight because he had his own problems in the form of Skeletons and although he dispatched them easily by the time he’d finished so had Joshua, he was kneeling over Inigo, telling him to brace, he rushed over and took the Khajiit’s hand, he nodded at Inigo’s unspoken question, the Khajiit squeezed his hand as Joshua removed the arrow protruding from his shoulder, his hand glowed and the wound healed cleanly

“Thank you my friends” he said to them, rolling his shoulder and wincing

“I’ve told you before at least an hour” Joshua scolded

They continued on through and out, a bemused Serana following them.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

That night at camp, they’d decided that considering they had a Vampire travelling with them it would be best to avoid the inns, Vilkas was sat watching Joshua play stick with the dogs, they both adored him, probably because he always had time for them, he was interrupted by Serana

“I’m getting the feeling that you and Joshua are intimate” she said looking at him laughing as the dogs mobbed him because he’d made the stick seemingly vanish

Vilkas smiled

“We’re married” he said

Serana nodded

“Thought so, hence the cold shoulder you’ve been getting ever since you agreed to escort me home” she grinned

Vilkas smiled

“No that’s just his way, he can be a little like that on missions with strangers”

He looked at Inigo for confirmation, the Khajiit shook his head

“I am sorry my friend, the temperature dropped as soon as you opened your mouth, cold even for Skyrim yes?” he grinned

Vilkas looked over and Joshua was sat staring into the woods with the dogs demanding to be stroked, quite vocally at times. He walked over to his lover and sat with him, Bran immediately took advantage of his presence

“Are you cross with me, Serana and Inigo seem to think you are?” he said

Joshua didn’t look at him

“Well, if Serana thinks so then it must be true huh” he snapped

Vilkas grinned widely

“You’re jealous” he said

He felt a little guilty at the amount of joy that gave him, Joshua was never jealous, he didn’t even think he was capable of that emotion, it would seem he was

“A little, you’ve fussed over her since....”

Vilkas cut him off with a passionate kiss, when they parted he said

“You have no reason to be, I only have eyes for you. That said, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me happy, you’ve never been jealous before”

Joshua grinned and rolled his eyes

“I have, I hated your friendship with Belethor, I just kept my horrible feelings to myself, why burden you with them as well” he said “and there was Laette”

Vilkas shuddered, the whelps attentions had moved to Torvar where they were very welcome, he was just glad it was over and she no longer bothered him when he visited without Joshua. He pulled his husband into a hug

“You have nothing to worry about, ever. I would never be unfaithful to you, remember Fenrir mates for life” he cuddled him a little tighter

Joshua smiled

“I’m surprised you thought I wouldn’t be jealous, to be fair though I’ve only had it with you and Mar and....” he stopped

“What?” grinned Vilkas “What is it baby?”

Joshua sighed

“And I’ve had it with you and Mar” he admitted

Vilkas was still a little confused, he’d simply repeated himself, then he realised what he was saying

“You thought me and Ondolemar....” he left the rest unsaid, “where did you get that idea?” he asked, he really couldn’t fathom, he wasn’t any closer to him than Inigo

“You two were very close when I came back from Sovenguard, I thought for a while I’d lost you” he admitted

“In future, don’t torture yourself over silly thoughts and tell me so I can put them to rest okay?” he said gently kissing his husband

Joshua smiled at him

“I would stop if I were you, it’s been a few days and all this affection is having a, at present, unwanted effect” he indicated his trousers which were becoming a little tight

Vilkas chuckled

“That is one advantage to armour” he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they reached the castle the initial welcome was not warm, that was until the Watchman realised that Serana was with them, he ushered them into the castle, an Altmer seemed overjoyed at Serana’s return and announced their arrival loudly, although his speech was cut short by a Nord, Serana’s father it would seem, Vilkas was annoyed by his attitude seemingly only interested in the Elder Scroll she hadn’t let out of her sight since she’d joined them, it seemed that he’d started to question Joshua

“You first” his husband said

Her father introduced himself as Harkon, a Vampire Lord, he offered to turn Joshua as reward for his daughter’s safe return

“Thanks but I’m good, Dovahkiin is enough for me” he said smiling

He walked over to Serana

“It’s been an honour to meet you and I sincerely hope our paths cross again sometime in the future” he said hugging her

Vilkas and Inigo hugged her and said their goodbyes and they were escorted out of the castle


	28. Rescue Repaid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ondolemar and Sinding move their relationship forward

Ondolemar was awaiting his lovers return, he’d gone hunting, it was part of controlling his wolf training and the woods around Lakeside were populated by Deer. He had apparently dozed off because he was awakened by a shriek of pain and then a snarl. He immediately recognised the snarl as Sinding’s and ran down the steps, he got to the other side of the house and realised they had him cornered. Absolute fury flowed through Ondolemar, they were judging him, for something he had no control over, before he knew what he was doing he’d thrown a fireball and it engulfed the Silver Hand killing him. the Elf allowed the anger to consume him and threw an ice spike at the other one but it only wounded her, she flew for Sinding, trying to stab him but the wolf defended, the dagger only grazing his arm, he slashed at her throat with his claws and it was all over

He spotted Ondolemar, anger still burning and recognition came over the wolf’s face and it made its way carefully over, by the time he reached him the anger had disappeared and love had replaced it in the elves eyes

“Are you injured?” Ondolemar asked quietly, the wolf lifted his arm, by the time he’d healed it, Sinding was man again

“I’m sorry, I messed up, I led them here” he said fear evident

“The Silver Hands already knew we were here, they also know not to approach, I’m surprised they were so brazen” he said reassuringly

A sound from behind them made Ondolemar turn sharply the anger reasserting itself, he was surprised to see the Necromancer from the altar. Sinding cowered behind him having fought a Necromancer before

“I heard the screams but you seem to have it all under control” she walked down to the Silver Hand bodies and spat on one of them “kill anything you don’t understand, that’s the Skyrim way I’m afraid” she smiled sadly

“Not just Skyrim, it’s a plague that infects every province” Ondolemar replied looking at her questioningly, she indicated Sinding

“He saved me from that bloody Giant a few weeks ago, when I heard his calls of pain I came to help, wouldn’t have survived if it wasn’t for him, thank you” she said gratefully and returned to her altar

Ondolemar looked at a confused Sinding

“It wasn’t you was it” Ondolemar giggled quietly

Sinding grinned

“No, probably Vilkas” he said

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Ondolemar made tea, whilst Sinding sorted himself a bath, once he was settled enjoying the warm water, Ondolemar tutted as the water revealed the extent of the cuts and grazes on his lover’s body

“You led me to believe that you were uninjured other than the cut on your arm” he scolded smiling, Sinding smiled back

“Just a few minor scrapes, nothing that won’t heal” he said, “Joshua told you about our talk didn’t he”

Ondolemar’s cheeks glowed so it was pointless lying

“Yes, he thought I needed to know, it makes sense now, why didn’t you tell me, I love you, you can tell me anything” he said coming to the side of the bath to take his lovers hand “I thought you knew that” he added quietly

“I was afraid that I’d hurt the one person who looked at me and didn’t see a monster” he said tears forming in his eyes, Ondolemar was about to reply but Sinding hadn’t finished “tonight, when I turned and saw you all I felt was love, my wolf didn’t want to hurt you, all it felt was protective”

Ondolemar leaned over and kissed his lover gently

“I’ll go and make you something to eat” he smiled and left Sinding to bathe in peace

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Ondolemar felt a presence behind him and a moment later arms encircled him

“Mmm, hello” he said the contact stirring him

“Shame you’re busy” came the husky reply

“Nothing I can’t leave, what did you have in mind?” he asked

Sinding took his hand and led him upstairs to the bed they’d been sharing for the last few nights, he quickly removed the mages clothes having not bothered to dress after his bath

“I want you, I can’t fight the urge anymore” Sinding said his voice thick with desire

‘Thank the Divines, Finally’ Ondolemar thought to himself, he pulled Sinding into his arms and kissed him passionately, losing himself in his lovers touch, they sunk down onto the bed, for the moment just enjoying each other although the need was becoming unbearable. Sinding pulled away

“I’m sorry, I don’t have…”

Ondolemar put his finger to his lips

“It’s okay, I have” he said his cheeks brightening a little as he scooted across the bed and opened the drawer

He offered it to Sinding, his way of saying ‘do you want to take charge?’, his lover took the bottle with a sexy smile and proceeded to oil up Ondolemar’s cock, then he put the bottle on the side, and leaned down, nipping at his lovers lips. This drove the Elf crazy, he grabbed the smaller man and laid him down on the bed,

“Fuck me” Sinding’s voice was begging, needy

Ondolemar took the oil bottle off the side and covered his fingers, he found his way to the entrance and slowly eased a finger inside, Sinding spasmed and he groaned with utter pleasure, Ondolemar was pleased to be able to do this as his lover had insisted on doing the pleasuring before, he was soon easing two fingers in and out, the Nord was a gibbering wreck of pleasure and Ondolemar found this very exciting, he needed him

“Do you want me?” he asked his need obvious in his tone

“Yes” Sinding managed

Ondolemar eased his fingers out and replaced them, a loud moan escaping from his throat

“Auri-El baby you feel so good” he groaned as he rocked his hips

He looked into his lovers eyes and they flashed for a second, it didn’t matter, there was no way on Nirn he could stop now, his lover seemed to sense this as he started to push down to meet him

“Gods…I can’t hold on” Sinding gasped

Ondolemar was shocked and very excited by his lover’s unaided release, he felt himself go and he filled him with a loud groan. They laid for a while just holding each other, Sinding was the first to speak

“I don’t know what to say, you are…amazing” he said breathlessly “No one’s ever done that before”

“Happy to please, does that put your worries at rest” he said looking lovingly into his eyes

“Yes, although I did feel it, I understand now what Vilkas was saying about the wolf loving you too” he said not taking his gaze from his lovers

“Does he?” Ondolemar asked nervously “love me I mean, we’ve never discussed it”

“He does, it’s strange, I’ve always felt at war with my wolf, but since meeting you, it’s not as bad, weird” he said “I think he fell for you first, his heart broke seeing you caged”

Ondolemar felt overwhelmed every time Sinding referred to loving him when he was in Markarth, he’d hated what the Thalmor had made him into, but this gentle soul had seen through all that, Sinding moved slightly and he realised he was crying on him

“Sorry, got a little overwhelmed. I always do when you talk about loving me in Markarth. I thought everyone hated me” he said

Sinding stroked his cheek

“No, not everyone” he said quietly

 


	29. Elder Scrolls and Moth Priests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joshua and Vilkas rescue the Moth Priest

They’d been sent on what Joshua referred to as busy work, he was not happy to be sent on such a menial mission, to recruit two warriors who Isran had previously worked with, when they arrived back at headquarters Isran tested the visitors for vampirism, satisfied he told them to find somewhere to call home and get some food, he then indicated Vilkas and Joshua should follow him upstairs

“She turned up while you were away, she’s damn lucky we didn’t just kill her on sight” he explained as they climbed the stairs

Vilkas took his husbands hand just to reassure him, he received a squeeze in return. They’d talked to Serana and she’d explained her father’s plans, ‘why can’t we all just live here, why does someone always have to try to destroy it’ Vilkas thought to himself, she’d also told them they needed a Moth Priest to read the scroll, luckily Isran had heard of an Imperial scholar who’d recently come to Skyrim

“I guess we’ve got to go escort him here then huh” Joshua snapped angrily

Isran grinned

“Would I send anyone else but the Dragonborn on such an important mission?”

‘Trying to stroke his ego is not wise’ Vilkas thought to himself

“Cut the crap Isran it doesn’t suit you, we’ll go find the priest and bring him here, but no more busy work or I swear to Merida....” he snapped and stormed off

Vilkas smiled at Serana

“We just follow in this situation” he said

She grinned and dutifully followed Joshua.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When they were safely outside of the fort Serana spoke

“Where exactly are we going? Isran didn’t exactly give us a lot of information”

Vilkas looked at Joshua

“That’s a good question, we can hardly just wander round Skyrim hoping to bump into him” Vilkas said

Joshua turned to them and grinned

“Vekel” he said, “we’re going to see my old mate Vekel”

Serana looked at Vilkas who shrugged his shoulders

“Seems like we’re heading towards Riften”

Inigo nodded

“Vekel runs a bar of sorts in the city” he said, “Joshua has many friends in many cities” he smiled

When they reached Riften it was getting late, Joshua looked at Inigo

“Go see Keerava, she likes you see what she knows, I’ll go see Vekel, we’ll meet at Honeyside”

Inigo nodded and looked at Serana

“You had better come with me, Vekel’s friends can be a little jumpy” he said to her

Vilkas waited until they were alone before he asked

“Won’t they be a ‘little jumpy’ about me?”

Joshua smiled

“Probably, Del and Bryn at least, it’s okay baby, I’m with you, you’ll be fine, besides you know Cynric”

“So there’s a bar down here, how in Oblivion did you find it?”

Joshua smiled

“Well, the Argonian who owns the Barb doesn’t like me, we had a small disagreement about me being a Thalmor, I torched a chair, nothing serious, I paid for the damage, the males okay, I helped him out, but she’s a bitch, plain and simple, hacking off the inn owner is not a wise idea, so I had to find somewhere new to drink, asked around and found out about the Flagon, they weren’t that happy about me being there till Vekel vouched for me, we’ve been mates ever since, he’d heard about my barney with Keerava and they don’t exactly get on either” they’d reached the door to the underground bar

“Oh probably should mention, this is the thieves guild headquarters” he said and before Vilkas could formulate a response he pushed open the door and was heading towards a large Nord

“Dragonborn, gods it’s been a while, thought you were too good for us Ratway folk now” he grinned

Joshua grinned back

“Nah Dirge, you know I always come to see my man Vekel when I’m in town, been busy is all, Dirge this is my husband Vilkas, Vilkas this is Dirge”

The two men nodded their greeting and Joshua wandered into the strange bar

“About bloody time you showed your face, you owe me a rematch” a balding Breton grinned

“No, I told you not until you snog Bryn” he said, “and you won’t beat me then either” he said

The barman who Vilkas presumed was Vekel grinned at him

“Not a fair fight Dragonborn and you know it” he said

“Don’t know what you’re talking about Kel, I didn’t cheat” he said innocently

“No, but you didn’t tell him you weren’t just some Altmer lost in Riften either did you?”

Joshua smiled leaning on the bar

“No, but in my defence he didn’t ask” he grinned, “two meads and not that Black Brier crap either” he said putting money on the bar

He shook his head and opened a cupboard behind the bar and produced two Honningbrew meads out and took the money

“Kel, I need some information what’s it gonna cost me?” he said

The Nord raised his eyebrows

“Depends, what you wanna know?” he said

“Moth Priest, what you heard?” he asked

“Is that all, free my friend, your favourite Argonian and mine had a Imperial Scholar pass through, going to Dragon Bridge, gods know why” he said

Joshua got his pack out and dug into it

‘Inigo’s right, you should pack more carefully’ Vilkas thought to himself as his husband virtually tipped everything out

“Why is what you want always at the bottom?” he asked pulling a linen package out and giving it to Vekel, “here you go mate, for the info”

Vekel grinned and put the package in his pocket

“Thanks Josh you’re a Gent” he said

A Red haired Nord entered and rushed up to Joshua giving him an enthusiastic hug

“Didn’t know you were in town lad, why didn’t you pop by the stall”

Joshua hugged back just as enthusiastically, Fenrir growled possessively

“Only just arrived, Vil come here” he called and took Vilkas’s hand as he reached them

“Vilkas this is my good friend Brynjolf, Bryn this is Vilkas, my husband”

Brynjolf smiled at him,

“Nice to meet you lad” he said

“Aye” Vilkas said suspiciously, he didn’t like the way he was pawing Joshua, he’d turned his attention back

“I know you won’t hear it, but we all really appreciate all you’ve done for Etienne”

Joshua waved his hand

“It was nothing Bryn, I had to have somewhere to sleep when I was in Riften, especially after my run in with Keerava and this way I know the place is looked after” he smiled

Brynjolf shook his head

“You here for business or pleasure?” he asked as they sat with the Breton

“Both, I’m on the lookout for a Moth Priest” he said

Bryn narrowed his eyes

“Why?” he asked suspiciously

Joshua grinned

“Elder Scroll, why else?” he said

Brynjolf sagged

“They’re dangerous things Josh, you shouldn’t be playing with them as often as you do” he scolded

“We’ve all got to go sometime” he grinned in his usual blaze fashion

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They were walking through Riften later that night, Vilkas stopped him

“You own a house in Riften?” he said

Joshua nodded

“Yeah, most of the major cities in fact, the only one I haven’t is Solitude, can’t stand that place and Windhelm, although I am thinking of buying one” he said “you knew that though, didn’t you? I guess not” he said looking at Vilkas’s surprised expression “I let Etienne live in Honeyside” he sighed

“What, what is it?” Vilkas was concerned, was there something else

“Etienne is a little jumpy around strangers, just be patient” he said as he opened the door, they were greeted by Cynric

“Hi Vil, long time no see” he grinned taking the kettle off the heat, “tea?” he offered

Joshua smiled gratefully

“Love one, where is he?” he asked

“Downstairs, he’ll be up in a minute”

“How is he?” Joshua asked

“Better, I’ve been staying, he’s sleeping again now”

They heard footfalls on the stairs and a Breton came in

“Hi Joshua” he smiled

“Hi yourself, you’re looking better” he grinned

“Much, thanks to you. Anytime you want anything, you call okay” he said earnestly

“I’ll keep that in mind” Joshua grinned warmly

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

They left Riften the following day to travel to Dragon Bridge, as they entered Inigo giggled and Joshua rolled his eyes, Serana and Vilkas looked at each other

“And here is another Innkeeper Joshua is not all that popular with” Inigo grinned

Joshua looked at Vilkas

“I let Etienne have the bed remember, he wasn’t very clean” he said smiling, “she’s okay, I paid for the bedding”

They went into the Inn and Joshua went straight up to the bar, she had a suspicious smile on her face

“Joshua” she said by way of greeting

“Hello Faida, how’s things been?” he smiled

“Good thanks, yourself. I heard you defeated Alduin” she smiled

“Yeah, pretty good, Faida I’ve been told there’s an Imperial Scholar in the area, really would like to talk to him” she shook her head

“Not seen one love” she said, “I’d ask around town though, you know I never get out of this place”

They went out into town and saw a small child and a goat walking briskly towards them

“Joshua, you’ve finally come back” he called and ran up and hugged him

Joshua knelt so he was eye to eye

“Hi Clinton, say you might be able to help me. When you’ve been on patrol have you seen any Imperial strangers in robes coming through town?”

The boy grinned widely

“Yes, a man like that went across the bridge, it wasn’t long ago, if you’re quick you’ll catch him, hi Inigo” he said

The Khajiit smiled warmly

“Thanks bud, but I’m keeping you from your patrols” he leaned in conspiratorially “and we both know it’s the only reason Dragon Bridge is safe” he whispered and left the child to play.

As they walked across the bridge Serana jogged to catch up with him

“You’re amazing with kids, you haven’t thought of having any?” she asked

He shook his head

“Bit difficult love, given my preference” he grinned

“You could adopt, there must be children in need” she grinned back

He shook his head

“No, not really that parental, Vilkas either, we discussed it before we were married”

“You two really love each other don’t you” she said wistfully

Joshua took her hand

“You’ll find your Vilkas, he’s out there babe” he said, “trust me”

They saw the ambushed carriage and ran to it, the vampire’s corpse was laid a small way away and Inigo went over to search it, he found a note which indicated they had kidnapped the priest and taken him to Forebears’ Hideout, Joshua turned to Inigo

“It’s never bloody simple is it?” he asked

His Khajiit companion smiled

“You would hate it if it was my friend” he said wisely

They entered the cave and quickly dispatched the Death Hounds and their Vampire masters, they found the priest being held in a magical barrier, Serana found what they needed to drop it and deactivated it, the man was still partially enthralled, Inigo and Serana tried talking to him but it was no good, Joshua sighed

“I haven’t got time for this” he stated and walked up to the Imperial and knocked him out with one punch, when he regained consciousness the spell seemed to have been broken and he was himself again

“I am grateful to you for your timely rescue” he said smiling

“No thanks necessary, we need your help to read an Elder Scroll”

The Moth Priest’s smile widened

“Wonderful, so I will have an opportunity to repay your kindness, lead on” he said and they accompanied him to Fort Dawnguard.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Joshua was sat fussing the dogs outside, Vilkas walked down and sat with him

“You okay, you’ve seemed a little distracted since the priest read the scroll” he asked putting his arm round him and pulling him towards him

“The Dragon Scroll is at the college” he stated

“And I’m guessing you don’t want to go there” he said, kissing his head

“Not really, Vil if I tell you why you have to promise not to be angry” he said looking up at him

“I’ll try, no promises for Fenrir mind” he grinned and became worried when Joshua didn’t return it

“My last visit almost killed me” he stated

Vilkas kept the anger he felt from his face

“How?” he asked intentionally keeping his question short to disguise his feelings, it didn’t work, Joshua sensed it

“I knew I shouldn’t have told you” he said, finally smiling, “you have this irrational anger when it comes to me, they found an artefact they couldn’t control, it cost the Arch Mage his life and almost killed an acquaintance, the place isn’t exactly filled with happy memories”

Vilkas sighed

“It’s okay baby, me and Inigo will be with you and we don’t have to stay”

“Let’s get this over with then” he stated unenthusiastically


	30. Revelations - Arch Mage

Winterhold had pretty much been as Vilkas had expected, the college however, looming over the town almost menacingly was a different story, he could understand how the inhabitants of the town believed that the residents had something to do with the collapse

“I have quarters at the college, we don’t need to stay in the inn” Joshua said as they walked straight through the destroyed town

“Why didn’t Inigo join us this time?” Vilkas asked, although looking at the foreboding building on the horizon he had an idea

“He hates the college, he says they treat him like an idiot, he always waits for me at the inn when we have to visit” Joshua explained, “don’t worry, I’ll be fine, we’re only going to stay the night and collect the scroll from Urag, then we’ll leave like you said” he took his lovers hand and walked up the slope to the college.

They were met outside by a Khajiit and a Nord

“Joshua, it warms this one’s heart to see you safe and well” the Khajiit said, he gave them a beaming smile

“What mischief are you two up to?” he said

The Nord replied

“None, just avoiding Urag’s lecture on Shalidor’s writings” he grinned, “don’t tell him we’re out here”

“Your secret is safe with me, J’zargo, Onmund this is my husband Vilkas, Vilkas these are some of my college mates”, the Khajiit stepped forward

“Honoured” said Vilkas

“It is good to meet you” Onmund said although would not meet his eye

Vilkas got the feeling that his husband had enjoyed this young Nords company in the past. They bid farewell to the two students and ventured into the college, they were just about to go upstairs to Joshua’s quarters when they heard a call from behind them

“Sindill” Joshua sighed and turned

“Hi Ancano and I’ve told you, it’s Joshua now”

“Sorry, Joshua, I wanted to express my condolences, terrible, Ondolemar being taken from us so soon after Ilianna, what you must be going through”

He looked pointedly at Vilkas as if it was somehow his fault , he took Joshua slightly to the side, possibly thinking Vilkas couldn’t hear them, he could

“Thank you, yes it’s been hard but I’ve had Vilkas to lean on” he said the grief for Ilianna still raw

“Yes” Ancano sneered “we’d heard about your relationship with this Nord, do you really think this is a good idea so soon after Ondolemar, it could be grief, why don’t you go home to rest and grieve, your father has been trying contact you, he’s sent several letters, perhaps you haven’t received them”

Vilkas knew what he was insinuating and Fenrir growled angrily, Joshua’s reply surprised him

“I know, I received them, my marriage to Vilkas is not a reaction to Ondolemar’s death, we were over a long time ago, as for going home, it doesn’t matter how many well thought out letters my father sends me, the only words which mean anything are the last ones he spoke to me, now if you’ll excuse me it’s been a long trip and I really need to bathe and rest” he smiled and turned

“He regrets them” Ancano said quietly, “he told my mother, he hoped either I or Ondolemar could persuade you to see him”

Joshua sagged but didn’t turn

“It’s too late” he said and started up towards his quarters

Vilkas smiled sympathetically at the mage and followed

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

He found his love drawing water into a bathtub, he stood in the doorway just appreciating watching his body move, he cast a fireball into the cold water and steam started to float off it

“You led me to believe your parents hate you” he said quietly

“He only wants me to come home so I won’t embarrass him anymore than I have” Joshua answered with a snippiness to his tone

“I don’t think so, that’s not what Ancano was saying”

Joshua spun round anger flared in his eyes

“You disappoint me in fact you disgust me, why can’t you find a nice Altmer girl instead of doing those things with Ondolemar” he said snappiness changing to venom, “those are the last words he said to me, a thought out letter can’t erase those Vil”.

Vilkas thought of Jergen and Kodlak the two men who’d raised him, always supportive, never passing judgement, he couldn’t imagine what Joshua had gone through as a child and he went over and wrapped his arms around his love and was surprised to find he was shaking, as he held him he looked around where they were

“Will the Arch Mage mind you just using his bath?” he asked

Joshua looked at him confused, then he smiled

“Baby, I am Arch Mage” he said “I thought you knew”

“I do now” Vilkas said grinning proudly

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

The following morning they walked into the college library and headed for an Orc sat at a desk, he raised his head as they approached

“Arch Mage or not…” he began grinning widely

“I know, your rules about books still stand” Joshua returned the grin and pulled a chair closer to the old Orc’s desk “Shalidor’s writings?” he asked gesturing the book open in front of him

“Yes, the last volume you collected me, I’ve got some translations for you, but I’m guessing that’s not why you’re here” he said

“No unfortunately not, the Elder Scroll you’re holding for me, I need it” he said seriously

“You are chancing your luck, my dear friend” the Orc said concern evident

“Haven’t got a choice, people just keep trying to destroy the world and I live here, Vilkas has built us a house and everything so what am I supposed to do” he grinned widely

“Yes, well maybe it’s someone else’s turn huh?” he said

He walked up to one of the bookcases, he took a couple of books off and put them on his desk, he pushed the back and Vilkas heard a click, the bookshelf slid out from the wall slightly. The Orc pulled it out and opened a panel fitted into the wall, inside Vilkas saw books and papers. He produced the Scroll Tube that he’d seen poking out of Joshua’s pack a while ago

“Here, please be careful with it, they are dangerous things you know” he said as he handed it over as if it would explode if jolted

Joshua took it and put it in his bag

“You still okay to keep it once I’m finished” he asked

“Of course, it’s far too dangerous to be where the Thalmor can get their hands on it” he said looking around for their resident one, he didn’t see him so continued “I saw him talking to you yesterday, what did he want?”

“To offer condolences for Ondolemar” Joshua said quietly

“I heard about that, I’m sorry. I know you two were close” the old Orc said putting his hand over Joshua’s

He nodded

“Thank you, yes we were” his face changed to one of anger “and one day, Ulfric Stormcloak is going to pay”

The Orc grinned

“If anyone else had told me that I would have laughed at them, but coming from you I believe it” he said


	31. Father Visits

It was a good day, they’d returned to Lakeview for a few days relaxation. Ondolemar was bedding plants in the greenhouse, Vilkas was cooking dinner with Sinding helping and Joshua was playing his Lute with Inigo singing

“You know, I wouldn’t have thought a Khajiit would have such a enchanting singing voice” Vilkas said quietly

“I know, cat, you wouldn’t think it would you” he poked his head out when there was a knock at the door

“Don’t worry, I’ll answer it” Ondolemar said walking out from the greenhouse, “I need to stand straight anyway”

He went to the door, the sound of his trowel dropping brought the others running

“Hello Sindill, you have ignored my previous attempts at communication and as I was in the province to allow Elenwen to explain her recent behaviour and failures I thought I would come here in person” Joshua started to shake

“We have nothing to say to each other, you said all you needed to say you made your feelings very clear, I disgust you” tears evident in his voice he ran upstairs and out of the top door, Ondolemar looked desperately at Vilkas

“Go after him please Bethrys, you seem to be able to calm him, probably because you remind him of Ondolemar” he said, the elf looked at him gratefully

“Sera” he said to the Justicar and passed him to go look for his friend, Vilkas turned to Sinding

“Could you go and make our guest some tea please Sin and check if dinner is okay?” he said

“Of course” he turned and left them alone

“Please come in” he said but his tone was far from welcoming

“Thank you” he said looking at the house as if he was sure it would fall down around his ears any moment “my people inform me this was some sort of mating gift for my son” he said as they walked through

“Not really, we had land and needed somewhere to live” Vilkas said simply, he gestured the Justicar to sit and Inigo brought their tea through

“Thank you Inigo isn’t it?” he said “You look surprised, surely you don’t think I wouldn’t have checked the creature travelling with Sindill”, Inigo just scowled and returned to the kitchen, Vilkas heard him quietly venting to Sinding. The Altmer turned his razor sharp gaze on Vilkas

“I have also had you thoroughly checked, Vilkas, Parents both deceased, Brother, Farkas, twin, member and as of recently Harbinger of the Companions, Werewolf, yes we know about that, it was actually the one thing I tasked Elenwen with and she didn’t fail me completely. I keep an eye on the people who infect my son’s life, he may not believe it but I do love him very much and I just want to protect him” he said

Vilkas stood angrily, Fenrir’s anger was boiling looking at this man who dared to say he loved Joshua after all he’d done and he could stay silent no longer

“My husband is a kind, generous, loving person who is greatly loved in return by many people, despite what you have done to him he faces the world with an enviable optimism and takes what fate throws at him with a smile that has made me melt from the first moment we met. You took this wonderful, gentle soul and you tortured him, both mentally and physically. I can think of nothing crueller that what you subjected him to. I know what you’re thinking and I agree, I’m not good enough for him, thing is he doesn’t and I thank whichever of the gods decided that he would fall in love with me every single day. Now please leave my home and I would prefer that you didn’t return, unless Joshua invites you.” He turned and went upstairs and through the back door looking for his absent love.

He found him sat with Ondolemar on the Necromancers altar looking out at the lake,

“I’ve asked him to leave” he said quietly sitting next to him and holding him, “he won’t bother you anymore” he looked at Ondolemar “I don’t think he recognised you” he said

Joshua was uncharacteristically quiet and shrugged them off and walked down to the lake to throw the stick for the dogs, Vilkas looked at Ondolemar desperately, he sighed

“This is the effect his father has on him, just hold him and he’ll be fine, take him down to your spot by the lake and…” he trailed off leaving the rest unsaid looking down at his friend fussing with the dogs. Vilkas sensed someone behind them and spun round his eyes flashing, he was relieved to see it was Sinding

“He’s gone” he said simply “he’s left a couple of letters one is for you” he said to Ondolemar, he looked horrified and ran up to the house to check its contents. Sinding looked at Vilkas

“He told me to tell you you’re wrong, you are worthy of him, do you really believe you’re not worthy of his love?” he asked, Vilkas turned to him

“Dragonborn, Arch Mage, Champion of Ulfric Stormcloak, High King of Skyrim, what do you think” he said smiling

“Harbinger, Alpha and I don’t think he’s Ulfric’s champion by choice” he smiled back, Vilkas was amazed at the change in this small Nord, Ondolemar joined them, he was pale and shaking. He sat leaning on the altar holding a piece of parchment in his hand

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Sinding asked going to his lover’s side

“Vilkas was wrong, he knows exactly who I am” he said handing the paper to him, Sinding turned his lovers face to look at him ignoring the paper

“Then we’ll run, we’ll go to Morrowind, they don’t have a presence there and we’ll keep running, they’ll not take you my love, I’ll die before I’ll allow you to be caged again” Vilkas took the parchment from his hand and read it

“Is he serious?” he asked the shock evident

“I’ve never known my father to say or do anything he wasn’t serious about” Joshua said walking past them and back to the house, Vilkas turned to look at him and was shocked to see defeat in his eyes, he’d never seen that before, with all they’d faced together he never let it beat him, his anger started to boil again, Fenrir wanted to rip the man apart so he’d never hurt him again, he was jolted by Ondolemar jumping up and dancing round the altar in a most uncharacteristic way, Sinding thought his love had lost his mind, Morrowind wasn’t that exciting

“I’m free” he grinned at him and started dancing again, Sinding took the paper from Vilkas and read it

 

     Ondolemar

          You have gone to extreme lengths to leave us and it saddens me, however you are  
          important to Sindill and one day I hope to repair my damaged relationship with  
          beloved son, you being held in a detention centre is not a wonderful way to start  
          that process, so I have arranged for a new identity for you, simply present these  
          documents if you are challenged

          Please take care of my Sindill, ensure no harm comes to him and I hope you can  
          believe that I love him

     Raviss Caemius

 

“Can he do that?” Sinding asked

Ondolemar grinned

“He is the First Justicar of the Dominion, he can do anything he likes” he continued to perform his strange dance “I’m free Sin, did you hear?” he called and Vilkas turned to see Joshua smiling at him from the balcony

“Dancing huh Mar?” he grinned “not your strongest skill”

Vilkas jumped off the alter and took the steps two at a time, he pulled Joshua into his arms and gazed into his eyes

“You are amazing, you stood up to my father for me, I love you so much” he said quietly

“You’re worth it” he said kissing him gently

-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Vilkas woke later that night and immediately he knew his love was not beside him and Joshua’s side of the bed was cold. Panicked he jumped out of bed and ran downstairs, he was in none of the rooms, when he checked the back porch and found it empty full blown fear set in, he glanced up to the alchemy tower and saw a candle lit on the top, he rushed through up to the tower, Vilkas had not been quiet in his panicked search and was joined by Sinding and Ondolemar

Vilkas climbed the ladder and went onto the tower roof garden, he saw Joshua slumped against the chest staring out at the lake, he went over to him and took his hand, it was cold, very cold and tears filled Vilkas’ eyes, Gods not after all they’d been through, he couldn’t lose him now, he felt himself being moved away, the tears falling, he stared at Ondolemar trying to get some sense out of the lifeless Altmer, he was aware of someone talking

“He’s alive, he’s just cold from being out here too long, Sin what possessed you to come up here? Oh I see, yes, well...”

He was interrupted by a now growing angry Vilkas

“What? What do you see?” he barked at him roughly wiping his eyes

He saw Sinding hide something and Ondolemar pick up his unconscious friend, Vilkas tried to snatch him from his arms, jealousy rearing its head in a wash of negative emotions

“Go down the ladder first then I’ll hand him to you, you won’t climb down the ladder with him Vil”

Ondolemar’s eyes were pleading, so he did as he was asked and gently took his lover, he felt so dreadfully cold, Vilkas carried him to their bed, undressed him and gently laid him in it, Joshua started to mumble, most of it was incoherent, but he did make out one word ‘Ondolemar’, Vilkas looked round for the elf, Joshua’s terrified voice made him come back, although as he looked at him he realised he was still out

“Mar, don’t let him hurt me, please”

Ondolemar was at his side in seconds, stroking his hair

“Never again Sin, I promised didn’t I?” he said gently

Sinding tried to take Vilkas downstairs, they didn’t need to watch this, but he wouldn’t go, wouldn’t leave him, the movement made Ondolemar turn

“Get in with him Vilkas, naked, it won’t be a pleasant experience but it will warm him up, Sinding in the Kitchen, Joshua keeps sealed bottles, fill all of them with hot water, not boiling and bring them up, quickly please and trust me he will be fine”

Sinding looked at Ondolemar and Vilkas knew exactly how he felt, because he was feeling it, but they both followed his instructions

An hour or so later Ondolemar came into the bedroom with tea, Sinding was sat on the chair chatting quietly to Vilkas, he passed out the drinks and sat with his head resting on Sinding’s lap, Vilkas could keep his silence no longer

“So what exactly is going on with you and Josh then? Because I think we deserve to know” he said quietly, but his voice was still cross, Ondolemar sighed

“The last night he spent in the Isles I made him a promise, he was in a state very much like this and I promised him his father would never hurt him again, you have no idea, he won’t let me tell you, he was  angry about the little I did tell you. Vil you have no idea how much it meant to him that you stood up to his father for him, no one has ever done that before”

“That’s not what Vil was asking and you know it” Sinding mumbled

“No I know what Vilkas is asking baby and you also know why I can’t answer it”

He stood and pulled his arm angrily away when Sinding tried to stop him, he looked up and Vilkas was looking at him pointedly, but it was Ondolemar who spoke

“He, as they charmingly put it is ‘stoned’, he’s ‘riding a Skooma wave’ and as if that wasn’t bad enough he’s also smoked some tree bugs, he only does drugs when it gets bad, which since meeting you it hasn’t” he said

As Ondolemar spoke he felt Joshua cringing in his arms

“Give us the room please guys” he croaked, he refused to look at his lover, choosing instead to leave his back turned to him, Vilkas just pulled him in closer “I didn’t want you to find out, Gods, I am disgusting, I find an amazing guy and I screw him around and go on a drug bender, I know how you feel about drugs, I’ll understand completely if you want to leave

Vilkas sighed

“I want an answer to one question” he said tears falling

“I’ve never lied to you, not once and I don’t intend to start now” he said

“Do you want to be with Ondolemar, deep down in your heart, who resides there?” he asked

Joshua was silent for a moment, he turned to face the man he loved

“I can’t believe you would even feel the need to ask me that, You! You’re the only man I ever want to hold me, love me, does that mean you forgive me for the...”

He didn’t finish, looking up hopefully, Vilkas smiled at him

“Yes, I forgive you, can I ask something?” he said grinning

“What?” he smiled

“Is this what these bottles are for?” he said moving one and putting it on the floor

“Yeah, it’s for when you and Sinding are away for the night, we get cold without you” he smiled “we thought you’d prefer that to the alternative”

**Author's Note:**

> Inigo is a modded companion, heres a link to his page where there is a video showing him in all his crazy glory http://www.nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/40960/.


End file.
